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How to convince parents to let you live away at university.

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Went through the same situation in my first year. I have strict asian parents as well. It wasn't that bad, but I realised I couldn't be bothered making the effort to go home every weekend, so I just told them stuff like I had work to do and it wasn't benefiting my education in any way to come home every weekend. This was actually true in most instances, because I got really tired from the train journey and I would sleep most weekends having done none of my tutorials for that week. So we came to the compromise that I would visit every month instead.

Essentially just tell them what they want to hear. If their main concern is you getting an education, go with that line. If money is tight at home, use that. You'll be surprised about how many people do go home in halls though. I was quite shocked, but staying in halls every day can just mess with your head. Good luck!

Reply 21

Anonymous #2

Also, I forgot to mention, I wouldn't bother pressuring them too much now. Wait till your at university. Even though it may seem like a huge problem at the moment, they might just agree to placate you (this is what my parents did). Just wait till your actually there, then at least you can justify it. Start telling them how tired you are from the journeys etc, how you haven't had the time to do any work. Just agree with them for now. Things can be sorted out later.

Reply 22

Anonymous #1

Original post by gm15

Apparently this deserved 2 negs? All i said was that it was his choice not theirs.
And somebody else told him to get a restraining order out against his parents and got no negs
(not saying the OP neged)

That is exactly the kind of point that I needed! Thank you! A few more points and I should have this all in the bag, hopefully. I reckon that they think that I'll still be able to find a group of people to live with or something...

Original post by teshnit

Tell them if you cant socialise at the weekends and make new friends, it will cause you detrimental affect towards your degree, for example who will want to share a house with you if you don't socialise in first year, you'll have to end up renting with randomers, which by the sounds of it is a problem for your parents with you being around "new people"

I didn't give a negative rep to anybody, only a retard would give negative reputation. Come on, you're all here giving me amazing advice, something that should be appreciated, not looked down upon, or something like that

Reply 23

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

I want to apply for student finance soon as well, I like to get things done with quickly, I've convinced them to let me go study far, having Asian parents this is an achievement in itself! I just need to get over the final hurdle really :smile:

If you don't mind me asking, how long was your journey from Train->Home.

Reply 24

teshnit

Mate your very welcome, lying and making stuff up quickly that passes as truthful is just years of experience of having my parents, I'm Indian so i understand what you're talking about, and not going to lying there will be no big group of people to live with unless you return to halls but that does go against the major norm.. tell them ruining the experience of uni and disrupting that social aspect could possibly drive you to ends and flunk those exams with all the heated tension/pressure to satisfy all the components you and your parents want

Reply 25

Planar

It goes like this, "Yes I will stay at home with all of you. I love you very much, I am sorry for ever doubting you."
Then when the time comes you say, "Oops. I lied."

Reply 26

The Maestro

Original post by gm15

"Let" you? You are an adult; its your choice.

when you have asian parents, the word 'choice' is non-existent...i say this from experience, haha

Reply 27

the maths guy

tell them you can whipe your own ass after a sh;t

Reply 28

Panda Bear

They're not exactly going to come to your uni and drag you home every weekend. **** 'em.

Reply 29

the maths guy

Original post by The Maestro

when you have asian parents, the word 'choice' is non-existent...i say this from experience, haha

it's your choice whether you wanna be a pussy or a man, don't blame it on your bangooliness

Reply 30

Lozza_00

ween them off gently....

ie. go every week for a couple of weeks then every 2 then once a month etc etc.

Reply 31

Anonymous #1

OMG! Holy ... Wait, I don't think I'm allowed to curse on this forum. They actually said yes! We was just "casually" talking about train fares, my Dad doesn't want to pay £70 a week. He said "F... it, go there, you'll grow up". Mum's a little bit upset though, but there's no progress without struggle :smile:

Honestly, I can't believe I relied on you guys to get through this. It feels like it's been weeks, it was only a few hours ago. :biggrin:

I'm just shell-shocked that they said yes, hopefully revision will go well for me. I don't even know how I'm feeling at the moment, but honestly, thank you. I read every single post, and there wasn't even one retarded reply, I think I'll stick around on this forum and help others now :smile:

I've officially got "cool Asian parents" now :smile:

Peace and Love.