The Student Room Group

I don't get my ex!

Ok I broke up with my ex getting on to 3 years ago now (together almost 3 years) - I met someone else fairly soon after (who I now live with etc) anyway ex and me didn't really talk for ages, he said he hated me etc -Both went to separate unis and that was that.... Anyway one evening back home for a while a group of us went out and got really drunk I ended up talking to him about stuff and ended up basically apologising for everything that happened between us:s-smilie: - although I personally think everything was his fault - he broke up with me! - Shouldn't have needed to apologies for meeting someone else.... (Basically a few months after we split he wanted to get back with me but didnt like the fact I was with new guy - he said I was only doing it to get back at him etc - very horrible about the whole thing....posted crap about me online etc etc)

Anyway he then started talking to me more after that on MSN and things every now and again, every time he got with a new girl he would tell me all about it - I assume to make me 'jealous' - Im really not....

One weekend we were both back in our hometown (this is like a year and half later) he text me saying him and his then g/f had split and he wanted me to go out for a drink with him - I declined.

Didn't really talk again for ages......

Anyway about a month ago his FB status changed to 'in a relationship' - 2 days later I get a text from him asking if Im back for xmas as we should meet up etc - I think I literally replied with 'maybe'.

Anyway today he text me a few times

Him: 'Hey hun, you still coming back to xxxx over xmas? x'
Me: 'If weather holds out I'll be back christmas eve'
Him: 'Damn, well let me know. Ill be out xmas eve, maybe see you out? x'
Me: 'Honestly unlikely - wont be back till late, might be around for few days after'

I mean I don't get it - He literally hated me for an age because I got with someone else and told me we could never be friends etc and then he's texting me asking me to meet up with him now and again - he's with someone else now and he knows Im with someone else. I'd like to believe he has grown up a bit and maybe just wants to act like an adult but in all honesty I don't see that - at the end of the day I last saw him about a year and a half ago and its not like I would have anything to talk about with him regardless, seeing as I live with my OH pretty much everything I would have to talk about would involve him in some way....
If I did ever meet up with him I cant imagine it would go any differently than him telling me how fantastic his life is in a lame attempt to make me jealous.....
(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 1
Original post by suzie101
Ok I broke up with my ex getting on to 3 years ago now (together almost 3 years) - I met someone else fairly soon after (who I now live with etc) anyway ex and me didn't really talk for ages, he said he hated me etc -Both went to separate unis and that was that.... Anyway one evening back home for a while a group of us went out and got really drunk I ended up talking to him about stuff and ended up basically apologising for everything that happened between us:s-smilie: - although I personally think everything was his fault - he broke up with me! - Shouldn't have needed to apologies for meeting someone else....

Anyway he then started talking to me more after that on MSN and things every now and again, every time he got with a new girl he would tell me all about it - I assume to make me 'jealous' - Im really not....

One weekend we were both back in our hometown (this is like a year and half later) he text me saying him and his then g/f had split and he wanted me to go out for a drink with him - I declined.

Didn't really talk again for ages......

Anyway about a month ago his FB status changed to 'in a relationship' - 2 days later I get a text from him asking if Im back for xmas as we should meet up etc - I think I literally replied with 'maybe'.

Anyway today he text me a few times

Him: 'Hey hun, you still coming back to xxxx over xmas? x'
Me: 'If weather holds out I'll be back christmas eve'
Him: 'Damn, well let me know. Ill be out xmas eve, maybe see you out? x'
Me: 'Honestly unlikely - wont be back till late, might be around for few days after'

I mean I don't get it - He literally hated me for an age because I got with someone else and told me we could never be friends etc and then he's texting me asking me to meet up with him now and again - he's with someone else now and he knows Im with someone else. I'd like to believe he has grown up a bit and maybe just wants to act like an adult but in all honesty I don't see that - at the end of the day I last saw him about a year and a half ago and its not like I would have anything to talk about with him regardless, seeing as I live with my OH pretty much everything I would have to talk about would involve him in some way....
If I did ever meet up with him I cant imagine it would go any differently than him telling me how fantastic his life is in a lame attempt to make me jealous.....



I don't know how to put it in words to be honest, but I think he probably had this 'stubbornness' and 'pride' in him after telling you he hates you etc etc and after you apologized, he now feels as he wouldn't seem 'desperate' or the one who is trying to be friends with you since you made the first move to 'start over again' (as friends, or however he takes it).

Not sure if that makes sense to you, sorry !!
I wouldn't bother meeting up with him, he sounds like a lying two faced idiot. The fact he blames you for the break up when he was the one who dumped you is shocking. Why go and meet this guy when you got someone much better in your life now, your ex lost out and maybe he realised but that's his fault, karma is a bitch.
Reply 3
Original post by Rock Fan
I wouldn't bother meeting up with him, he sounds like a lying two faced idiot. The fact he blames you for the break up when he was the one who dumped you is shocking. Why go and meet this guy when you got someone much better in your life now, your ex lost out and maybe he realised but that's his fault, karma is a bitch.


No to be honest I wont ever meet up with him - I dont really trust him at all, we didnt exactly have a good relationship whilst we were together anyway - he just seems to be so changeable....
I'm sort of in the same boat as you - my (ex)boyfriend broke up with me three weeks ago, and has text me lots since. He always initiates the conversations and even though I try to end it, he continues to text me - I just don't understand why?!

Unless you think having a catch-up with your ex will be nice but there isn't a catch-22, then don't meet up with him.
Reply 5
Maybe he wants closure and to know where you stand? That time where you were apologetic may be something he has latched onto, maybe he feels like you still have feelings for him.

Talk to him and be straight about how you feel.
Reply 6
Original post by littlehobbit
I'm sort of in the same boat as you - my (ex)boyfriend broke up with me three weeks ago, and has text me lots since. He always initiates the conversations and even though I try to end it, he continues to text me - I just don't understand why?


Ive come to the conclusion they just don't know what they have till its gone!

To be fair my ex gave me an ultimatum which back fired on him - we had a stupid argument at his house - he told me to leave so I did, he then started phoning me saying 'come back here now or its over between us' so I just walked away.....pretty shocking relationship really...
Original post by suzie101
No to be honest I wont ever meet up with him - I dont really trust him at all, we didnt exactly have a good relationship whilst we were together anyway - he just seems to be so changeable....


I couldn't be doing with changeable, it's not worth the hassle. You seem much happier with what you have got.

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