Asians, are you allowed to marry a girl/guy of your choice?

I wasn't sure if he was actually calling me immoral for giving head to my ex. This is exactly why people of my culture never move forward, because of dumbass dicks who think women should stay virgins until they're married. I agree with you. Firstly, just because you're not married doesn't mean you're not in a stable relationship, and secondly most Indian marriages consist of a faithful woman and a cheating, pathetic drunkard. Real stable, really something i want to wait for and look forward to. So those who continue to oppress women need to **** off back their holes.

I know, right?! She's so deluded!
It's all about how it is back in PK and that's why some old people like her are still attached to this kind of thinking. It's like Prince William marrying a chav basically in her opinion. People should only marry into those with similar status etc. I told her to **** herself and that I'd marry a good muslim boy, whatever his caste shiz is

My parents don't care what race i marry as long as he's muslim.
However i know that most aunty jees out there want their daughters to marry an asian man ONLY as they think ( so i'm told) that it would make the marriage easier if both the people are the same culturally and less chance of it breaking up OH and to prevent shame of their daughter marrying out of culture/race ''GOD FORBID''.

Some asians are pretty backwards!

Lol - I'm aware that you probably don't agree with it at all. And as soon as you are in a financially independent position there is very little they can do. I don't understand why on earth you can't be friends with boys though - what if you have a common interest with them - e.g. a sport, computer game, music choice, holidays etc.? Or what if you need to work with them as part of a group project?

How does it bring shame upon other family members though? I can't understand why they are responsible for your actions anyway. Surely the chances are that if [insert cousins family name] found out about your friendship (Oh MY GODZ!!!!!!) it would be glossed over since it is not exactly as shocking or newsworthy as say, the earthquake in Cumbria recently.

Also, have your auntiyas not heard of gender equality?

I am friends with a few boys lol, i just can't meet up with them in public and stuff. If people see you together they'll tell everyone they saw you with a boy and call you a slut. Then it'll go around the WHOLE community, and get back to your own family. Not that i care, but my parents do, and i don't want to go through the hassle again. It brings "shame" on them because it's like saying that they didn't raise their daughter properly, because she's apparently "promiscuous" and hangs out with loads of boys. It's like the parents responsibility to keep their daughters away from boys and in the house learning to cook! I know it's ridiculous.

Hahaha, these auntiya are stupid bitches. Gender equality is NOT prevalent in the Indian community. And they don't acknowledge that having a friend that's a boy is not a big deal, because their lives consist of gossiping about others. I mean, if they see you out with friends at night, that's another thing to gossip about. "Those parents, letting their daughters go out at all hours of the night, it's disgraceful!"

Firstly, how does she know how it is 'back in PK'? Has she actually visited the whole country (I mean NWFP, Punjab, Multan, Sindh, Waziristan, (Azad) Kashmir, Balochistan etc.).

Also, what if your social status (do you mean earning power?) changes during your lifetime. I was born in a lower-middle class household in South Asia in 1989 but now live in London and work in what is quite a 'middle-class' profession so obviously my relative earning power has increased.

Does she mean that the male and female salarie should be roughly identical?

i rate you!

shall we leave town together?

OMG I love your parents, I wish mine would let me marry anyone who is Muslim I mean why don't they realise that it doesn't matter what colour or race you are being Muslim is the only thing that matters.

My parents are pretty much fine with me and siblings finding someone but it goes without saying that they have to be Pakistani! I once tried the whole mum you know islam doesn't discriminate against race and it was like she could sense exactly what I was saying she was like don't even think about! DAMN!!

I can see where they are coming from you know people from the same race are easier to get along with but seriously people we need to intergrate!

And it sucks for me as I am not attracted to Pakistani or Asian guys they repulse me, so I have no idea what I am going to do :(

Yes please

let's go.

I am friends with a few boys lol, i just can't meet up with them in public and stuff. If people see you together they'll tell everyone they saw you with a boy and call you a slut. Then it'll go around the WHOLE community, and get back to your own family. Not that i care, but my parents do, and i don't want to go through the hassle again. It brings "shame" on them because it's like saying that they didn't raise their daughter properly, because she's apparently "promiscuous" and hangs out with boys. It's just seen as a bad thing to hang out with a boy, boys and girls are kind of supposed to be kept seperate. It's like the parents responsibility to keep their daughters away from boys and in the house learning to cook! I know it's ridiculous.

Hahaha, these auntiya are stupid bitches. Gender equality is NOT prevalent in the Indian community. And they don't acknowledge that having a friend that's a boy is not a big deal, because their lives consist of gossiping about others. I mean, if they see you out with friends at night, that's another thing to gossip about. "Those parents, letting their daughters go out at all hours of the night, it's disgraceful!"

most Indian marriages consist of a faithful woman and a cheating, pathetic drunkard. Real stable, really something i want to wait for and look forward to. So those who continue to oppress women need to **** off back their holes.

Assuming you live in Al-UK, then most males are not of Asian or Pakistani origin. You do have quite alot of choice. Convince your parents of the lack of importance of ethnic origin in finding a partner. Remember that in most workplaces or friendship groups in this country, Pakistani and non-Pakistani people are able to cooperate and work together easily without these massive 'cultural differences' that are cited.

And if your mother does bring up the issue of 'cultural differences', grill her on what exactly these impediments are, and whether they can be extrapolated to an entire ethnic group. Her argument will most probably lie in tatters after that.

Generalize much? If those comments were made by a non Indian they would be considered racist. But, you think you can say stuff like that and get away with it?

You're "allowed" to marry anyone you want to if you're an adult, for God's sake. Unless you're planning on living the life of a child forever.