Asians, are you allowed to marry a girl/guy of your choice?

You commented about being more flexible when you have your own children.
I assume this transcends race and you would allow(or at least accept the possibility of) your children to date/marry outside of Islam, or even disassociate from the religion completely?

Maaan I feel for you, did you know how strict she (or her parents) were about this before you began seeing her? - or did you think possibly she'll see the light and possibly change.

Can I ask you what would your parents say if you brought home a white/black/latino whatever girl home and you ENSURED them that they're perfect in every way, they're kind, generous, warm and basically makes you the happiest guy in the world and on top of this made sure to them that your culture or religion will in no way be subsidised - and that your kids will be Hindu and go to a Temple regularly?

Not quite. A Muslim man can marry a Muslim, a Jew or a Christian (if the Christian is a Unitarian and therefore doesn't accept Trinitarianism), whereas a female must marry a Muslim man.

Boooooo for the parents if Asian parents wanted to keep the caste system and hold on who you marry they should of stayed in Asia and not come here.

I would be flexible about race, but not religion. I would be devastated if my kids disassociated themselves from something I believe so strongly in - that's why I want to raise them in a way that encourages them to see the flaws in the way Islam is practised in messed up ways around the world and encourage them to believe in the core message of Islam, of just being a good person - the message that nobody who actually knows can possibly disagree with.

That said and done, if they still chose to disassociate themselves, I would never disown my child.

Yes, I'm allowed to choose who I want to get married to, as long as he's Muslim.
I think my parents would prefer it if he was Pakistani, as well, though.

Yeah I did. I was ready to make sacrifices to make it work for her (dropping alcohol, meat and persuading her side of the family). But I cocked up in the relationship and she lost trust in me.

wrt my parents - IF I brought home a different race then they would disagree.. but if I persuaded like you said, I believe they would come around because they'd realise it what makes me happy. However, this would not make them entirely happy, and so I wouldn't want to put them through that. Thats why, at the back of our minds, us indians lock out different races as potentials... unless someone too perfect comes along to block out.

Boooooo for the parents if Asian parents wanted to keep the caste system and hold on who you marry they should of stayed in Asia and not come here.

They came here for a better life though.

doesn't your religion say that your god is more important than your father/mother/brother etc?

so if your children disassociated themselves from the religion and went against the fundamental beliefs, isn't it your "duty" to disassociate yourself from your kids (I know it sounds really harsh from our western liberal stance, but from an islamic one (extremist).....

I've never looked at it as unusual

Where are your parents from? And I'd like to know your opinion on this thread.

You're lucky.

I believe he can marry a non-Muslims women but the expectation is she'd convert quite swiftly. Where as a female must marry a Muslim man.

Apologies if this is wrong Muslims.

Well, strictly speaking, God is more important but my 'duty' would in that case be to care for my child no matter what and try to guide them back to believing in God. After all, no kid has ever come back 'to the fold' because their parents froze them out.

(If you're muslim) why is that lucky? The Qur'an doesn't discriminates on race.

Muslim men are allowed to marry a person 'by the book' - this includes a Christian, Muslim or a Jew.

I'd only ever marry somebody that does believe that there is a creator and in the idea that there is only one creator.(so couldn't marry a practising Hindu or an Atheist)

My opinion - I'm not sure tbh as my parents never made it really clear. Though my older brother is engaged to a girl chosen by my parents (she is my distant uncle's daughter). Though they were already in love before that.

I think my parents would prefer it if I got married to someone from our extended family, but I wouldn't marry to a girl without knowing her first.

And my parents are South Asians who were born in UAE. So was I.

You're lucky.

.. How've you been? What happened to the ODC? lol