Feeling Lonely....

I know it seems a bit silly but me and my partner moved in together this year and tonight hes out on his work christmas party I realised just how lonely I am....
Last year I was living in a shared house, likewise so was OH, I got on really well with his house-mates and we always used to go out together etc, they've all left uni now and none of them live here anymore and Im pretty much left with no-one. The girls from my uni course are lovely but they are all considerably older than me, the majority all have children so nights out are never an option - our times together are usually out for lunch now and again rather than big nights out which we only do once a year at the end of uni. Now uni has been over for a few weeks and Ive realised other than my OH Ive not really seen anyone else, to be fair, he hasn't really seen anyone else other than me either but at least he has his work colleagues too.
Im meant to be going back to my parents tomorrow and everyone from back in school etc is meant to be meeting up for some drinks - I don't really feel like I can even do that; the group I used to hang out with somewhat sided with my ex when we split and Ive never really spoken to them since and my two best friends and I have really grown apart - they've both really changed since school times...As terrible as it sounds Im jealous of my OH because I know he'll be going out with his mates tomorrow night, and I actually get on really well with them. I just don't seem to have any of my own friends....
Id like to be able to meet people my age who I could enjoy having some time with but to be honest I just don't know where to begin, Ive been with my OH before my first year of uni so I never truly had the student lifestyle - majority of the time I was with him rather than out with other students, Ive never lived on campus either so I always feel like Ive missed out a bit there. If I had the money Id love to join the gym or some other activity but I can't afford it and there just doesn't seem to be anything else in my area....

Reply 1

shygirl92

7

That sounds crap. I have no decent advice, other than: man,up, make new friends. I kmow traditionally it seems our closest friendships were formed at Uni and School but that's silly. School (if you went to a state on like me) is just a post-code lottery, your stuck with these people and think you've made good friends when really it's a closed instituation. There is no stage in your life when you stop building friendships. Do you have a PT job? Or hobby that puts you in contact with other folk??

I have small circles of friendship built independantly of one another but no real close close friends. I have a set of friends from school, uni, volunteering, work, a summer project i did, my old work, football team etc etc. None of them intermingle but i'm a happy and social member of each group and go out with them regularly. I think you ought to get more involved in social hobbies etc and forge friendships with like minded souls.

All else fails...try the internet :s :/

Good luck xxx

Reply 2

Roo Bix

11

Investing in a gym membership is probably a good idea. You'll be able to meet people and stay fit at the same time.

Reply 3

Lamps08

14

Original post by Roo Bix

Investing in a gym membership is probably a good idea. You'll be able to meet people and stay fit at the same time.

How can you make friends in a gym exactly. Most ppl go in pairs anyway. I just let my guns do the talking :tongue:

Reply 4

Roo Bix

11

Original post by Lamps08

How can you make friends in a gym exactly. Most ppl go in pairs anyway. I just let my guns do the talking :tongue:

How can you make friends anywhere? If you're using the treadmill alot, and notice a regular that uses the treadmill too, just make some on the spot conversation, say hi.

Friendships are something that has to be developed. It's never really about the setting, it's more about connections and similarities you and that person share.

Reply 5

Lamps08

14

Original post by Roo Bix

How can you make friends anywhere? If you're using the treadmill alot, and notice a regular that uses the treadmill too, just make some on the spot conversation, say hi.

Friendships are something that has to be developed. It's never really about the setting, it's more about connections and similarities you and that person share.

Oh right, seems a bit hit and miss to me but I may think about trying it out someday. Wana shag this bird there innit. Guna wait till my guns get bigger to approach.

Reply 6

Roo Bix

11

Original post by Lamps08

Oh right, seems a bit hit and miss to me but I may think about trying it out someday. Wana shag this bird there innit. Guna wait till my guns get bigger to approach.

For some reason, Lamps, I thought you were the OP for a second. So my advice has changed:

Don't go to a gym ever looking to hit on girls. The largest majority are there because they want to work out, plain and simple. Another majority just repel against men at gyms because they use their muscles instead of their brain to think. The slimmest majority, enjoy the idea of a man approaching them with their muscles.

Reply 7

Lamps08

14

Original post by Roo Bix

For some reason, Lamps, I thought you were the OP for a second. So my advice has changed:

Don't go to a gym ever looking to hit on girls. The largest majority are there because they want to work out, plain and simple. Another majority just repel against men at gyms because they use their muscles instead of their brain to think. The slimmest majority, enjoy the idea of a man approaching them with their muscles.