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Asians, are you allowed to marry a girl/guy of your choice?

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Reply 320
Original post by lastmanstanding
Sorry, I have to disagree. The majority of scholars are agreed on the fact their must be no pictures (with eyes) as you cannot breath life into the picture, although there is indeed ikhtilaaf in this matter

I totally agree with everything else though


Personally I have never heard of this idea that you can't have pictures because you can't breath life into it. If it is an idea I would have to disagree and say that it is no humans job to breath life into anything, it is God's, therefore the presence of an image/photograph showing eyes shouldn't be an issue. As long as you are not facing the picture during your prayers and/or are not worshiping it, there shouldn't be a problem.
Original post by catty khan
yeah some of them are quite weird, but i aint :biggrin: x


haha, i'm half pathan - and that side are defo more 'hardcore'. Very, very cultural people (not always a bad thing though:smile:)
Original post by lastmanstanding
Wow man, it seems like there are so many restrictions for many of you :frown:

I can marry anyone I want (providing they're muslim) - and it'd be my preferance that she'd be a practicing muslim too anyway, so it's all cool.

Prob is that most of the girls that go out with guys have had sex of some sort - so it's like finding a needle in a haystack :crossedf:


:biggrin:

Excactly. Which is why I find it baffling when silly young muslims go on about how they can't have a boyfriend/girlfriend. Their so naive into thinking that nothing will happen. As if a lad will stay with you and have a relationship, without the sexual part. Please, do me a favour :rolleyes:
Original post by Deema
Personally I have never heard of this idea that you can't have pictures because you can't breath life into it. If it is an idea I would have to disagree and say that it is no humans job to breath life into anything, it is God's, therefore the presence of an image/photograph showing eyes shouldn't be an issue. As long as you are not facing the picture during your prayers and/or are not worshiping it, there shouldn't be a problem.


Bukhari:Narrated Abu Talha: Allah's Apostle (SAWS) said, "Angels (of mercy) do not enter a house where there are pictures.'"

Bukhari:Narrated Said bin Abu Al-Hasan:While I was with Ibn 'Abbas a man came and said, "O father of 'Abbas! My sustenance is from my manual profession and I make these pictures." Ibn 'Abbas said, "I will tell you only what I heard from Allah's Apostle (SAWS) . I heard him saying, 'Whoever makes a picture will be punished by Allah till he puts life in it, and he will never be able to put life in it.' " Hearing this, that man heaved a sigh and his face turned pale. Ibn 'Abbas said to him, "What a pity! If you insist on making pictures I advise you to make pictures of trees and any other unanimated objects."

Bukhari:Narrated Aisha: (the wife of the Prophet) I bought a cushion having on it pictures (of animals). When Allah's Apostle (SA saw it, he stood at the door and did not enter. I noticed the sign of disapproval on his face and said, "O Allah's Apostle! I repent to Allah and His Apostle. What sin have I committed?' Allah's Apostle (SAW) said. "What is this cushion?" I said, "I have bought it for you so that you may sit on it and recline on it." Allah's Apostle said, "The makers of these pictures will be punished on the Day of Resurrection, and it will be said to them, 'Give life to what you have created (i.e., these pictures).' " The Prophet added, "The Angels of (Mercy) do not enter a house in which there are pictures (of animals)."

But like I said, there is ikhtilaaf
Original post by Cesar Lecat
:biggrin:

Excactly. Which is why I find it baffling when silly young muslims go on about how they can't have a boyfriend/girlfriend. Their so naive into thinking that nothing will happen. As if a lad will stay with you and have a relationship, without the sexual part. Please, do me a favour :rolleyes:


Exactly! that seems to be the main reason for a 'relationship'

Some people are just deluded, lol
Reply 325
Original post by lastmanstanding
Bukhari:Narrated Abu Talha: Allah's Apostle (SAWS) said, "Angels (of mercy) do not enter a house where there are pictures.'"

Bukhari:Narrated Said bin Abu Al-Hasan:While I was with Ibn 'Abbas a man came and said, "O father of 'Abbas! My sustenance is from my manual profession and I make these pictures." Ibn 'Abbas said, "I will tell you only what I heard from Allah's Apostle (SAWS) . I heard him saying, 'Whoever makes a picture will be punished by Allah till he puts life in it, and he will never be able to put life in it.' " Hearing this, that man heaved a sigh and his face turned pale. Ibn 'Abbas said to him, "What a pity! If you insist on making pictures I advise you to make pictures of trees and any other unanimated objects."

Bukhari:Narrated Aisha: (the wife of the Prophet) I bought a cushion having on it pictures (of animals). When Allah's Apostle (SA saw it, he stood at the door and did not enter. I noticed the sign of disapproval on his face and said, "O Allah's Apostle! I repent to Allah and His Apostle. What sin have I committed?' Allah's Apostle (SAW) said. "What is this cushion?" I said, "I have bought it for you so that you may sit on it and recline on it." Allah's Apostle said, "The makers of these pictures will be punished on the Day of Resurrection, and it will be said to them, 'Give life to what you have created (i.e., these pictures).' " The Prophet added, "The Angels of (Mercy) do not enter a house in which there are pictures (of animals)."

But like I said, there is ikhtilaaf




Unfortunately the English translation makes it sound like the Quran is referring to ANY picture. The specific meaning of the word "picture" in the passages you have quoted about is the pictures people used to worship instead of worshiping Allah! People used to worship images of animals, the sun etc as though it had the power to save them or help them in some way. I'm sorry if I am being unclear. The presence of a picture for the sole purpose of decoration is not haram.
Original post by Deema
Unfortunately the English translation makes it sound like the Quran is referring to ANY picture. The specific meaning of the word "picture" in the passages you have quoted about is the pictures people used to worship instead of worshiping Allah! People used to worship images of animals, the sun etc as though it had the power to save them or help them in some way. I'm sorry if I am being unclear. The presence of a picture for the sole purpose of decoration is not haram.


As I have been taught, just pictures of animated objects are forbidden, any other picture (for decoration or otherwise) is permissable - I think we're both on the same wavelength?
Reply 327
Original post by lastmanstanding
As I have been taught, just pictures of animated objects are forbidden, any other picture (for decoration or otherwise) is permissable - I think we're both on the same wavelength?


You may have to further explain the pictures of animated objects? Do you mean pictures of living things? Animations like mickey mouse? This could mean anything so being on the same wavelength is unfortunately only a possibility right now! :smile:
You can easily get away with it if you're a boy IMO and this is true for most cases. My cousins have had white gfs around my nan's house and everything since he was 15/16? and everyone was totally cool with it, if I dare bring a boy, even if it was a friend my nan would be pretty pissed off.

I don't think my parents care who I marry and I don't care if they care.

I didn't have a say in their marriage so why should they have a say in mine? :tongue:
(edited 13 years ago)
Original post by Deema
You may have to further explain the pictures of animated objects? Do you mean pictures of living things? Animations like mickey mouse? This could mean anything so being on the same wavelength is unfortunately only a possibility right now! :smile:


Yep, living things such as animals etc.. not 100% sure where animations would fit in but i'd imagine they'd fall under the same ruling. I covered this topic like 4 odd years ago so i'm not as sharp on the matter as perhaps I should be, khair - never mind....this can be my refresher
Reply 330
Original post by lastmanstanding
Yep, living things such as animals etc.. not 100% sure where animations would fit in but i'd imagine they'd fall under the same ruling. I covered this topic like 4 odd years ago so i'm not as sharp on the matter as perhaps I should be, khair - never mind....this can be my refresher


We never know what we could learn speaking to other Muslims (as I assume you are), as only few of us have actually read AND understood the Quran, and even then nobody's understanding is perfect. Anyway, with regards to the living animal thing, I think this fits into the criteria that as long as the picture of that living animal is simply for decorative purposes it isn't an issue. As far as I am aware, anything goes in terms of images as long as it is not of Allah/ Angels/ the Prophets or something pornographic. People condemned for the presence of images in their houses are condemned because they worship the images. I guess the way you could apply this to todays society is the way in which some people idolise celebrities. I don't think there's a problem with having a poster of them to show that you support them, but some people go over the top by going as far as trying to copy them and that is definitely haram.
I'm not asian, but the day my parents tell me I need to marry a 'certain' someone so as not to make the 'family' or them look bad is the day I lose respect for them.

Lol at the spineless noobs who are scared of getting disowned, any parent who actually disowns their child on the basis of such matters need shooting.
Original post by Deema
We never know what we could learn speaking to other Muslims (as I assume you are), as only few of us have actually read AND understood the Quran, and even then nobody's understanding is perfect. Anyway, with regards to the living animal thing, I think this fits into the criteria that as long as the picture of that living animal is simply for decorative purposes it isn't an issue. As far as I am aware, anything goes in terms of images as long as it is not of Allah/ Angels/ the Prophets or something pornographic. People condemned for the presence of images in their houses are condemned because they worship the images. I guess the way you could apply this to todays society is the way in which some people idolise celebrities. I don't think there's a problem with having a poster of them to show that you support them, but some people go over the top by going as far as trying to copy them and that is definitely haram.


A muslim I am, alhumdulillah.

yep, copying a celeb is indeed haraam - it's also quite sad how far some people go!
Original post by Cesar Lecat
Okay then, if you put it like that. The marriage was fine then. Your mum believed him when he said he was a muslim. Kind of sick of your dad to do that to be honest. What kind of man lies t the woman he loves and comprimise the religion she believes in? That's just horrible :s-smilie:
aha lying was a big problem in their relationship causing divorce.


There isn't a split. I honestly don't know where you have been researching, but even your average muslim would know this. I can if you want, provide the quotes from the Quran?

The fact is, there is no debate or discussion on the issue. I mean look at this article to show you the proof....

http://www.oxfordtimes.co.uk/news/4423688.Imam_bridges_a_wedding_divide/

Only one imam is doing it out of the thousands that are in Europe. Marrying a non muslim is a sin if you are a woman. Only a muslim man can marry a non muslim, but not just any non muslims, but only the people of the books. They are Jews and Christans. Anybody else is a massive no. Furthermore, they have to be practising Jews and Christians and must be virgins. (if they are practising, they wouldn't have sex before marriage) and then finally, there must be an agreement that the child will be raised as a muslim.

Do you want me to provide you the evidence? I mean, it really isn't that hard. Just google it :s-smilie:



Not wearing a headscarf does not mean you are not a muslim :biggrin:

So wait, you won't choose your partner based on religion? :s-smilie: You have to if you believe in the religion. Because if you want to be with your partner and he doesn't meet the requirements set in Islam, your marriage is illegitimate accoring to Islam.



Basic? No, your a muslim.



Hang on, are you serious? Breast/lip/nose surgery is nowhere near having braces put? Good lord. How many 13 year olds do you know who have undergone plastic surgery? The religion states you should not change your body for certain reasons. Having a breast surgery is shallow and not allowed. Lip and nose surgery is different and might be allowed. but for example if you have lip surgery to make your lip more "sexy" and pouty, then no. If it's because it looks weird and a bit odd, then fine.

Islam expects women and men to be modest. I agree with the last point. However if you wear tight jeans, don't expect a bloke to check you out. You're wearing it for a reason. To make you look good :s-smilie:



Hopefully you'll find the time and money to go to Mecca. Millions of muslims have never been and never will go due to financial or health reasons. Just becuse you haven't been to mecca, doesn't mean you're a bad muslim. Just as long as you plan to go in the future :biggrin:


I dnt know why he lied either..maybe he got scared my mum woudn't accept a hindu..no idea

actually i listened to the professors in like muslim countries..you see my mums aunts are terribly religous and when i go over to them there's always these religous channels open so yh i just listened there as research..and i agree with you..it's very strict with who you marry other than a non-muslim but there are exceptions like people of the books christians&Jews.
Thats what i mean..
like if you marry a Jewish or christian it's still a massive sin but better than a hindu or Buddhist.
as we dont count them as true religions.
i'm not sure if they have to be virgins though so i cant comment on that.
and yh deffo child has to be raised muslim.
sure go ahead provide me evidence i like to learn :smile:
unfortunately i cant proivde evidence as i've been learning from peole and T.v and stuff..like i said My Mums aunt is SUPER religous..she's been living in Saudia arabia for i dunno how many years now and she knows the Quran inside out so i just rely on her..but she's REALLY extreme in cases.

yh i agree not wearing a headscraf is just a sin it doens't make menot muslim :tongue:

yh i won't choose my partner on religion.
I do believe in the religon but it's not part of the 5 pillars.like i say i'm like the basic type.

and yes there is basic types.
ANYONE who does the 5 pillars is muslim.
that is something noone can argue..the rest is part of the religion..
if i marry someone who isnt jewish or Christian my marriage will be illegitimate BUT it'll still make me muslim.other good followers however will only pick according to religion.

and yes unfortunatly I am serious.. I'm not exactly sure of this but my extremely religous mums aunt tells this and ive heard from other places.
Basically making changes to your appearance artificialy is not acceptable..
I think you got that wrong..no iam 100% sure that nose,lip,breast surger isn't allowed even if it looks weird.
Teeth i'm not sure about..I definitely know that your not allowed to have your teeth like pulled out and put fake teeth instead but braces i dunno..
some say braces are artificial too others say it's still the original teeth just putting it in shape with no operation involved..
personally i in no way agree that having braces is a sin.
no i'm not wearing tight jeans to make me look good..i'm really used to it.
plus the point isn't even about tight jeans..
even wearing Tracksuits is unacceptable because it outlines your legs..
to me this idea^^ is nonsense..
the best way a women should dress is cover up head to toe according apparently..
yh i plan to do so in the future :biggrin:
the thing with to going mecca is that after going there you HAVE to cover up..at least your head..i'm already sinning now not wearing a headscraf but if i dress openly after going there it's like so much badder than now..
plus you have to be a much more respectful,sensible person.
bad things you do now will be much more sin after visiting mecca
and i dont think i'm ready to cover up right now as i'm only 17 so i plan to go after a few decades :wink:
Original post by Deema
1) Some of the things you say here are completely irrelevant to Islam. The whole thing about people not putting up pictures in their houses- this is NOT part of Islam and therefore CANNOT be an aspect of the religion you disagree with because it simply isn't an aspect. This sort of behavior is a result of the misinterpretation of the rule that Muslims must not idolise or worship an image/statue.

2) The rule most Islamic scholars go by is that cosmetic surgery is allowed under one of two circumstances: Firstly, that the defect is causing the person to feel negatively about themselves to the point of severe unhappiness or depression or that surgery will improve the person's health. Secondly, that the defect is a result of an accident and so something is being fixed as opposed to changed. The same applies to braces, many people feel incredibly unhappy about the way they look and most of the time the way their teeth look is a result of environmental changes i.e. thumb sucking moving teeth forward.

3) Yes, Islam demands that women should not try to make themselves desirable to men. This is a point many people pick on especially in the West to try and make out that Islam is being sexist. However, if you take a closer look at the Quran, the male "hijab" is stressed around 3 times as often as the female. Men are to cover themselves from the naval to the knees and should avert their eyes from women they find beautiful or attractive (hence the self control you believe is not demanded from men).


number 1 i think we both agree on so no point discussing much really.
yes exactly what you said ,muslims musn't idolise and worhsip images/statues.some muslims take it too far unfortunately and don't even allow photo's in their house.i'm talking about experiences.

2)no i am sure that having plastic surgery is unnaccptable due to you being unhappy withyourself.like you said if it's a health issue or caused by accident it is no problem at all.
i know that getting your teeth pulled out and replaced with fake one's is unacceptable but braces is a differen matter.it depends on the teeth.
some teeth are VERY dodgy like 11mm apart fom each other..the top teeth and bototm teeh making you "buckteeth" again if it was only appearance that was the problem it's considered wrong but if it stops you from eating and creates difficulty then braces are acceptable.

3.i agree that men are stressed over as well in the Quran however generally it's only women that get stoned to death in islamic countries..
i'm not saying it's right but thats how islamic societies have developed..
Reply 335
course, why not? :smile:
Reply 336
Original post by Menakshelatte
number 1 i think we both agree on so no point discussing much really.
yes exactly what you said ,muslims musn't idolise and worhsip images/statues.some muslims take it too far unfortunately and don't even allow photo's in their house.i'm talking about experiences.

2)no i am sure that having plastic surgery is unnaccptable due to you being unhappy withyourself.like you said if it's a health issue or caused by accident it is no problem at all.
i know that getting your teeth pulled out and replaced with fake one's is unacceptable but braces is a differen matter.it depends on the teeth.
some teeth are VERY dodgy like 11mm apart fom each other..the top teeth and bototm teeh making you "buckteeth" again if it was only appearance that was the problem it's considered wrong but if it stops you from eating and creates difficulty then braces are acceptable.

3.i agree that men are stressed over as well in the Quran however generally it's only women that get stoned to death in islamic countries..
i'm not saying it's right but thats how islamic societies have developed..


2) I specifically said severe unhappiness or depression so that people would understand I mean that the unhappiness has lead to psychological problems which, although you may not regard to be important, do count as health issues. I didn't mention teeth being pulled out and replaced with fake ones but the same principle is there too... If they are pulled out and replaced simply to be more aesthetically pleasing then of course this is wrong, but replacing them because the gum has become diseased and they are full of cavities is not wrong. Many children are bullied for the way their teeth look, leading to severe unhappiness (psychological problems) and therefore braces aren't wrong. People may go so far as to argue that braces aren't wrong in any circumstances because you aren't actually changing the tooth, just it's position, so it is similar to weight gain/loss.

3) I don't see your point here, the dispute was over the Islamic representation of how males and females should act around each other, all you have done is stated that most Islamic societies nowadays do not follow Islam as it should be followed. They are wrong, and their actions don't change the rules.
Original post by aimz08
Even if you're in love? How can you be so sure?

sure about what??
Original post by lastmanstanding
haha, i'm half pathan - and that side are defo more 'hardcore'. Very, very cultural people (not always a bad thing though:smile:)


yeah my grandparents are proper cultural, but no1 cares nemre haha, :wink:
To be fair, now its probably not liked but non-arranged marriages do go ahead. A cousin of mine got married to a guy that she met. Remember, there is still an element of choice, when it comes to arranged though!

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