The Student Room Group

Calling all Aspies! and Auties and PDDNOS

Scroll to see replies

Original post by HpFreak_Amy7192
Ah, see where I am, we don't have a communal area as such, there is a bar and gym on the bottom floor but I hardly ever go down there so it's not a problem for me. Plus, we have 2 bathrooms and 2 kitchens in our flat, so there's hardly ever a time where someone will be in the kitchen (a couple of freezers and ovens in each kitchen, so even if there is someone in there at the same time, it's not a problem).

If we ever invite anyone back we usually just stay in our rooms with them. Only problem for me is that with where my room is (and where the actual place is), I can hear everyone coming back from the nightclub round by us, and the pipes go through my room so it's a little annoying sometimes.

It depends on the person. If they're like me where they're more independent as such and are happy to do stuff for themselves and spend time on their own, then they might be more suited to somewhere like where I am at, whereas if they want a nice, close unit, then somewhere like where I was before might be better.


Ah, I think perhaps it comes down to what kind of people you get stuck with. I would love to live in that kind of an "independent" environment where everyone just minds their own business (like the one you describe... although the fewer people, the better for me). However, I got put in with a group of typical hyper-social teenagers who would always hang out in the kitchen (which unfortunately also doubles as a social space due to the TV/couch setting), cook together, watch TV together, make big bright posters together, etc. They would have their room doors propped open so they could talk to each other without leaving their own rooms, they would sing along to the radio in the corridor and discuss what to wear to the night's party. And then sometimes they would invite the neighboring boys over, doubling the crowd and the social madness.

I think your case is probably the odd one out, as unfortunate as it is. From what I've seen (and read on TSR) I think most freshmen tend to be the hyper-social type. Maybe a solution would be to room with second and third year students or graduate students instead (if it's allowed).
I know of two people (one boy, one girl) at my uni with ASD; and also know that they have just as good a time, and are just as integrated, as anyone else on the course :-) You'll find that people at university are a lot more accepting and less judgemental than they might have been at high school, so please don't worry. Most unis have excellent support centres for any learning difficulties, too :-)
Original post by Gemma :)!
I know of two people (one boy, one girl) at my uni with ASD; and also know that they have just as good a time, and are just as integrated, as anyone else on the course :-) You'll find that people at university are a lot more accepting and less judgemental than they might have been at high school, so please don't worry. Most unis have excellent support centres for any learning difficulties, too :-)


Well, some people just get lucky (both in terms of the extent of their difficulties and the surrounding environment; plus I bet one affects the other).

I heard a lot of the "less judgemental" stuff before I left... then got called 'weird' the very first night there (their first night there, I arrived a few days earlier).
Reply 23
Original post by A Mysterious Lord
Urgh, you can't self-diagnose Asperger's :mad:


To an extent you can, and to an extent you need to.
It seems so many people/professionals/teachers/doctors fail to spot it, it takes the patient to raise the potensial of having AS...then the next step can be made, getting assessment etc. =)

EDIT: OP, over the next week or so i'm hoping to get my website finally together which will provide open-minded advice/information by people with AS, for people with AS (and other conditions too). One of my friends has written a smallish amount about being at University and having AS :smile:. He was one of the most nervous and typical AS people you will ever meet, and he did extremely well.

I do advice though if you can, to choose smaller halls - aka where you get 8 people who tend to socialise/cook together etc...a big hall like at my Uni where you socialised in groups of 20 may not be great. Infact one guy i know has AS moved out after 2 months as he really couldnt take the noise.
(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 24
Original post by Kerny
Go and get formally diagnosed. I'm pretty sure people who actually have the aspergers are tired of people like you running around saying you are an aspie whilst in reality you are simply seeking to blame all your social problems on a disorder which you don't have.


If he does or doesn't have it, does it really matter?
There's many social techniques and tactics AS people have picked up and use that could help someone with social anxiety/social problems (who do not have AS) :smile:.
For example with small talk, eye contact or w.e.

Nothing wrong with sharing or asking for a bit of info :smile:.
Reply 25
Original post by Peregrinum
I have no idea how they grade tutorials. Sheffield has Programme Specifications on their website, maybe Birmingham has something similar as well. Anyhow, it says that there are data analysis sessions (same as tutorials?) which consist of instruction, discussion, and practice; and then there are tutorials mentioned separately, but both type of classes are assessed and supervisors will provide oral and written feedback (which counts toward the practical module grade).

A doctor can help you in terms of diagnosing you. Mine is good, scientifically-oriented and not too touchy-feely. She works with both kids and adults and the center provides numerous therapies for kids with autism spectrum disorders so I knew she'd be familiar with the condition (many unfortunately aren't). If you choose to go to a doctor then pick a young one - Asperger's only came to exist as a formal diagnosis in 1994 (in the DSM) so going to someone who has completed their residency in the late 1980s or earlier is probably a waste of time.

I decided to change course because the original one wasn't what it was made out to be. All the brochures say that you can take up to a third of your modules from the other two biology departments (Sheffield has three) and I counted on it, I made my choice to go there because of that, but when I got there it turned out that it's not possible (all the classes are completely full, etc.). I intend to go all the way to a PhD so I thought it'd be best not to specialize too heavily too early on and decided to do a broad biology degree. But then I was forced to rethink my plans and since I'm certain that my future lies in the molecular biosciences I might as well go into it right away. Almost all straight biology degrees are focused on organismal biology anyway, and that's just boring. Sheffield's biochem program is broad enough, specific enough, without the ubiquitous biomedicine slant, and in the top 5 for biosciences, and all that is exactly what I want. I just wish I had realized that a little bit sooner. Oh well, there are dozens of reason why it's better this way anyway. By the way, I just received my very own Molecular Cell Biology by Lodish (basically this subject's bible) and now I spend all my days reading and memorizing that (yeah, special interest transformed into an obsession) so that when I get there in 9 months I can show them that no "disability" is going to hold me back. :smile:

Heh, I might not be as "your age" as you might think. It took me two extra years to get through high school because I had some serious problems before being diagnosed, and now I'm missing another year. If everything had gone according to "the schedule" then I'd be graduating from a BSc program this spring. However, I'm not, I'll be starting my MSci just a few months after turning 22. Mentally and experientially, however, I'm not over 13 or 14. :redface:


Wow, a congratulations on persevering for your degree!
Original post by AshleyT
If he does or doesn't have it, does it really matter?
There's many social techniques and tactics AS people have picked up and use that could help someone with social anxiety/social problems (who do not have AS) :smile:.
For example with small talk, eye contact or w.e.

Nothing wrong with sharing or asking for a bit of info :smile:.


She* Thankyou. :smile:
Original post by AshleyT
Wow, a congratulations on persevering for your degree!


Thank you. :smile: Although for me it's kind of like being congratulated on being able to breathe. If I don't have some sort of educational goal to strive for then I might as well not exist (because I lack the skills and desire to do anything else).

By the way, will your website have anything on dealing with change (in daily routine, environment, expectations; you know, the usual stuff) and meltdowns? Those are probably my biggest problem areas and I haven't found anything useful yet.

PS. Everyone who has noise issues (I do, too) should apply to Sheffield. The rooms in Ranmoor and Endcliffe villages are amazingly soundproof. :biggrin:
Original post by Peregrinum
Thank you. :smile: Although for me it's kind of like being congratulated on being able to breathe. If I don't have some sort of educational goal to strive for then I might as well not exist (because I lack the skills and desire to do anything else).

By the way, will your website have anything on dealing with change (in daily routine, environment, expectations; you know, the usual stuff) and meltdowns? Those are probably my biggest problem areas and I haven't found anything useful yet.

PS. Everyone who has noise issues (I do, too) should apply to Sheffield. The rooms in Ranmoor and Endcliffe villages are amazingly soundproof. :biggrin:


HELLO!
Reply 29
Original post by Peregrinum
Thank you. :smile: Although for me it's kind of like being congratulated on being able to breathe. If I don't have some sort of educational goal to strive for then I might as well not exist (because I lack the skills and desire to do anything else).

By the way, will your website have anything on dealing with change (in daily routine, environment, expectations; you know, the usual stuff) and meltdowns? Those are probably my biggest problem areas and I haven't found anything useful yet.

PS. Everyone who has noise issues (I do, too) should apply to Sheffield. The rooms in Ranmoor and Endcliffe villages are amazingly soundproof. :biggrin:


I suppose so :wink:. But still, a big congratulations on not giving up :smile:.

Yep, im planning to cover everything possible. And it will be community based so everyone can comment and give their own hints, tips and advice on situations.

My mum's already written about 20 pages on social tact, understanding nerotypicals, and giving eye contact(or making people think you are giving eye contact when infact you are not :wink: )

That's the main reason i'm doing the site btw - there's lots of information on symptoms and problems...but no information on solutions!
Original post by AshleyT
I suppose so :wink:. But still, a big congratulations on not giving up :smile:.

Yep, im planning to cover everything possible. And it will be community based so everyone can comment and give their own hints, tips and advice on situations.

My mum's already written about 20 pages on social tact, understanding nerotypicals, and giving eye contact(or making people think you are giving eye contact when infact you are not :wink: )

That's the main reason i'm doing the site btw - there's lots of information on symptoms and problems...but no information on solutions!


Aw, thankyou very much for making that website. Could you give me the url when its ready? :smile:
Original post by Destroyviruses
HELLO!


Hi! Don't worry, I haven't forgotten your PM. I've had a couple of lousy Aspie days and as a result no desire for communication, but I will get to it, I promise. :smile:
Original post by AshleyT
I suppose so :wink:. But still, a big congratulations on not giving up :smile:.

Yep, im planning to cover everything possible. And it will be community based so everyone can comment and give their own hints, tips and advice on situations.

My mum's already written about 20 pages on social tact, understanding nerotypicals, and giving eye contact(or making people think you are giving eye contact when infact you are not :wink: )

That's the main reason i'm doing the site btw - there's lots of information on symptoms and problems...but no information on solutions!


Seems like the eye contact topic is a big rage on autism-centered websites. Most social skills therapies I've looked into also seem to be big on that. But I don't get the importance... :s-smilie: You're "normal", right? So tell me, why is it so important that I stare at my conversation partner's corneas while talking to her about the weather?
Original post by Peregrinum
In order to have a "real" diagnosable ASD you must present difficulties in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning. If you have some autistic traits, but no clinically significant difficulties then you'd probably be described as being on the broader autism phenotype. If you do have difficulties with functioning then I suggest you seek a diagnosis - social situations aren't the only trap once you're at university. For example, I have articulation difficulties (both in oral and written communication) and sensory issues and they can really affect my ability to do well academically (even though otherwise I'm more than capable). For example, trying to concentrate in lectures can be really difficult due to inability to filter out background noise. Tutorials can be really uncomfortable because they allow a mix of social and communication difficulties (like I may not know what is expected of me unless it's clearly spelled out).
I did my high school diploma via a distance learning course and because this path lacks the elements of normal classroom discussion and all that, the switch to university was that much more difficult for me (as it probably is for most students who don't follow the traditional path) because the gap was way more obvious. It's easier for those who go from high school classes to university lectures, but if you've "missed out" on traditional secondary education then it may be much more difficult to reorient yourself and adjust in the new environment. And having Asperger's really doesn't help. But having a formal diagnosis allows you to access certain types of help.


I need/want a formal diagnoses. Reading symptoms and traits, I can relate to 90% of them. I visited the autism centre website (based in Cambridge), I have taken the AQ several times and I got around the 40 mark, my EQ is 24. As for the AAA (adult aspergers assessment), I ticked 21 boxes out of 23.
Original post by King-Panther
I need/want a formal diagnoses. Reading symptoms and traits, I can relate to 90% of them. I visited the autism centre website (based in Cambridge), I have taken the AQ several times and I got around the 40 mark, my EQ is 24. As for the AAA (adult aspergers assessment), I ticked 21 boxes out of 23.


Well, if you want and need a formal diagnosis then you should take the necessary steps to make it happen. :smile: Just going by the numbers you do seem to have AS. But don't rely too heavily on the numbers, a lot of the traits and general statements can be interpreted in a myriad of ways, making yourself believe you have symptoms that you don't really have (or the reverse - downplaying actual problem areas). I found the diagnostic process quite surprising - I thought I did really well on the EQ, but I actually scored an extremely pathetic 6 points (which is way low even for someone with AS), I thought I aced the neuropsychological stuff, but the result was that I may as well have brain damage because the scores were so lousy, and at the same time I performed quite well on a non-verbal intelligence test (although I had kinda studied for it so I don't know if that counts). Anyhow, all I'm saying is be prepared for surprises and don't think the AQ is the "be-all end-all". And if you're certain of yourself (of having it), don't give up. :smile:
Original post by Peregrinum
Well, if you want and need a formal diagnosis then you should take the necessary steps to make it happen. :smile: Just going by the numbers you do seem to have AS. But don't rely too heavily on the numbers, a lot of the traits and general statements can be interpreted in a myriad of ways, making yourself believe you have symptoms that you don't really have (or the reverse - downplaying actual problem areas). I found the diagnostic process quite surprising - I thought I did really well on the EQ, but I actually scored an extremely pathetic 6 points (which is way low even for someone with AS), I thought I aced the neuropsychological stuff, but the result was that I may as well have brain damage because the scores were so lousy, and at the same time I performed quite well on a non-verbal intelligence test (although I had kinda studied for it so I don't know if that counts). Anyhow, all I'm saying is be prepared for surprises and don't think the AQ is the "be-all end-all". And if you're certain of yourself (of having it), don't give up. :smile:


I don't view it as a negative thing, as it has its positives. I'm sure of the symptoms, I have the vast majority.. A diagnosis will help clear up and explain a lot of things.
Reply 36
Original post by Peregrinum
Seems like the eye contact topic is a big rage on autism-centered websites. Most social skills therapies I've looked into also seem to be big on that. But I don't get the importance... :s-smilie: You're "normal", right? So tell me, why is it so important that I stare at my conversation partner's corneas while talking to her about the weather?


I'm about to get an assessment for ADHD :wink:.

But as for eye contact i suppose they'res a variety of reasons. I think one of the big ones is that people may assume a lack of respect - if you're not looking them in the eye, it can look like you're not paying attension to what they are saying, therefore they may find it disrespectful.

In addition it allows neurotypicals to read a person, and by not giving eye contact it's hard for a nerotypical to interpret their body language/facial expressions, so they get aggrivated.

We also have the fact that psychology of neurotypicals it states that lack of eye contact shows nerves, insecurities and other things. So it's common neruotypicals interpret lac of eye contact as such and can unnerve them.


And i think it's a lot of rage on autism websites because as it's one of the biggest giveaways to the condition? Aka, lack of eye contact could show 'something's not quite right' and those with AS/Autism can often strive to appear 'normal'.

That's a few possibilities. Of course it's theory on my behalf.
(edited 13 years ago)
Original post by Peregrinum
Hi! Don't worry, I haven't forgotten your PM. I've had a couple of lousy Aspie days and as a result no desire for communication, but I will get to it, I promise. :smile:


Oh ,no pressure! I like seeing your posts :smile:.

I'm very familiar with lousy aspie days. Take as long as you need. You don't have to reply! :smile: xx:smile:
Original post by AshleyT
I'm about to get an assessment for ADHD :wink:.

But as for eye contact i suppose they'res a variety of reasons. I think one of the big ones is that people may assume a lack of respect - if you're not looking them in the eye, it can look like you're not paying attension to what they are saying, therefore they may find it disrespectful.

In addition it allows neurotypicals to read a person, and by not giving eye contact it's hard for a nerotypical to interpret their body language/facial expressions, so they get aggrivated.

We also have the fact that psychology of neurotypicals it states that lack of eye contact shows nerves, insecurities and other things. So it's common neruotypicals interpret lac of eye contact as such and can unnerve them.


And i think it's a lot of rage on autism websites because as it's one of the biggest giveaways to the condition? Aka, lack of eye contact could show 'something's not quite right' and those with AS/Autism can often strive to appear 'normal'.

That's a few possibilities. Of course it's theory on my behalf.


My gosh, life would be so much easier if we were all on the spectrum. I'm almost glad I don't understand all those social rules and behaviors and whatnot; not being literal can only cause problems.
At this point (in my blissful solitude) I also have no desire to conform and appear normal. Besides, the whole syndrome is centered around the lack of innate social abilities plus the inability to learn these things well, so why should I be the one "training" to be normal? They should be the ones making effort since they're so damn good and natural at it.

I also think that not making eye contact is one of the biggest "false indicators" of ASDs. Lack of eye contact is also a symptom of social anxiety/social phobia, avoidant personality disorder, and plain old shyness (just to name a few). There are too many people thinking "I'm not good at making eye contact and I'm not very social, hence I must have Asperger's". Not many people realize it's just one tiny symptom (which by itself doesn't even satisfy a single AS criterion).
Reply 39
Original post by Peregrinum
My gosh, life would be so much easier if we were all on the spectrum. I'm almost glad I don't understand all those social rules and behaviors and whatnot; not being literal can only cause problems.
At this point (in my blissful solitude) I also have no desire to conform and appear normal. Besides, the whole syndrome is centered around the lack of innate social abilities plus the inability to learn these things well, so why should I be the one "training" to be normal? They should be the ones making effort since they're so damn good and natural at it.

I also think that not making eye contact is one of the biggest "false indicators" of ASDs. Lack of eye contact is also a symptom of social anxiety/social phobia, avoidant personality disorder, and plain old shyness (just to name a few). There are too many people thinking "I'm not good at making eye contact and I'm not very social, hence I must have Asperger's". Not many people realize it's just one tiny symptom (which by itself doesn't even satisfy a single AS criterion).


I think it has to be both.
It can be hard for neruotypicals at times to accomodate those with Aspergers, for example trying not to make changes, or perhaps if you're with a friend avoiding busy areas as you know your friend with AS can't handle them.

Neurotypicals definitely need to put out effort in understanding those with AS, being less judgemental etc but that's something in a way that takes learning or comes naturally...but yea, it can be difficult to accomodate everything all the time. Like if i reeeeally want to do something spontaneous and i'm with a friend with AS who hates spontaneous stuff and can't deal with it...i cant do it.

I think this stuff should be taught in schools though tbh, how both can learn and work together - it may also help reduce bullying when the neruotypical children have more understanding of those with Aspergers =).

I agree with eye contact there - one of my close friends, one of the most typical Aspergers you will ever meet - actually doesnt have much problem with eyecontact.

And it's nice you have accepted yourself so well =)
(edited 13 years ago)

Quick Reply

Latest