How close would you let your girl/boyfriend get to a friend of the opposite sex...?

Right well I'm a girl, and some of my best friends are guys, but lately I've noticed one of them is acting really strange, maybe flirting a bit and maybe getting a bit too close? All my close male friends have girlfriends, and while I personally don't have a boyfriend, I'm not really interested in anyone at the minute so it's not as if I'm encouraging him or trying to make him cheat or anything. But anyway, this guy. He's been texting me a lot lately, wants to meet up, that's fine because we're good friends but the other day when I was sat next to him, he started holding my hand. I didn't really mind because I really like him but I felt really disloyal to his girlfriend? I've never met her but I think I'd hate to have a boyfriend that acted like this and got really close to another girl behind my back.

So my question is, how close do you think a girl and guy can get (if one or both are in a relationship) before it's going a bit too far? What do you think about flirty texts, hugs, holding hands etc? I really like being close to my male friends but I don't want to ruin their relationships by upsetting their girlfriends just by not drawing the line between friends and getting too personal :/ and if you read the bit above, do you think this guy is acting too 'intimate', as if he likes me, or he's just being friendly? Thanks in advance :smile:

Reply 1

popdrops

Hugs are universal IMO. Flirty texts, holding hands= past the friendship territory..ish

Reply 2

nicatre

Depends a lot on the individuals.

For example, if a a girl and guy have been friends since childhood and thus help each other with problems and hug like any other close friends, you can't really say anything against it, it'd be like siblings or long term same sex friends etc.

I think it's only a problem is any actual feelings are present, most people say random things or joke flirt or what ever anyway.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by nicatre

Depends a lot on the individuals.

I think it's only a problem is any actual feelings are present, most people say random things or joke flirt or what ever anyway.

Yeah I think I agree with you, and there's definitely no feelings present, on my side at least, and I really doubt he has any feelings at all for me. Nothing has happened and nothing ever will, but I can't help but think what I'd be feeling like if I was the girlfriend... I'd hate me!

Reply 4

converselove

I'd say the holding hands part is going too far. And perhaps the flirting unless it was in a jokey way. My boyfriend used to flirt with his female friends and I used to flirt with my male friends but we weren't serious about it, we were just messing around and neither of us were left out. I think that's okay but if it starts to get serious flirting and holding hands, I'd draw the line.

Reply 5

LadyRowena

Hugs aren't a problem. If I found out my boyfriend had been sending another girl overtly flirtatious texts I would be annoyed, though.

If you don't respond in a flirty way then no girlfriend can rightly have a go at you, especially if you've always been friendly and welcoming towards your friends' girlfriends.

Reply 6

joey11223

Original post by popdrops

Hugs are universal IMO. Flirty texts, holding hands= past the friendship territory..ish

Yeah I agree. I'll still hug females friends although I suppose I do behave a little differently now I have a girlfriend.

4m radius

WHY DID sHE SLAP?

Original post by Anonymous

As long as YOU aren't doing anything or suggesting anything etc then you're not a guilty party. If you feel he crosses a line tell him, but as long as you're not doing anything you don't think is fine then all is well.