The Student Room Group

Nee-Naw-Nee-Naw! Food Crimes we Cannot Abide!

'Ello 'ello 'ello! Looks like you're committing a crime towards food and drink so heinous I'll have to nick ya!

This thread is devoted to those things that we believe are the absolute atrocities against food we've ever experienced/witnessed. Whether someone has a habit that ruins perfectly delicious foods in your eyes, or discards the best part of something, everyone has something they regard as a real Food Crime. I'll get the ball rolling with a few examples.

CHUCKING AWAY THE ENDERS/HEELS/KNOBBIES OF A LOAF



These may well be the last pieces eaten in a loaf of bread, but to throw them away is a crime that cannot be tolerated. They are the absolute heroes when it comes to toast (topped or otherwise) and the only beast strong enough to actually be picked up when topped with beans whilst other slices disintegrate, engulfed in the bean-juice of devastation.

PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA/GAMMON



A slightly more controversial addition for me to add, but this to me, is an absolute food crime. Pineapple is one of those fruits which is unarguably very sweet. It's not even like one of those fruits that has a muted flavour... it's sweet. Sweet as a flavour is synonymous with dessert, and to me, a nice juicy gammon steak or cheesy pizza... well, that's just not a dessert. By being so sugary-sweet, the addition of pineapple overpowers the taste of the other ingredients entirely, even whilst cooked; and the mouthfeel of your tongue tearing apart hot pineapple... not cool, man. Not cool. Jail time. No parole.

KETCHUP ON STEAK



Now, I'm not talking about having a little pot on the side as pictured above. I'm talking about something all the more atrocious.

I once went with my family for a meal at a nice restaurant; myself, mum, dad, sister, aunt, uncle, nieces and nephew. My uncle ordered a fairly expensive steak, and ordered it medium-rare. Nobody else had; he quite literally held up all of our other orders whilst his special sizzling platter arrived and everyone created a hubbub about how fancy it all was.

"Do you have ketchup, please?" he asked. They brought him a little silver bowl with a spoon. "No, the bottle, do you have the bottle?"

They returned with the bottle of luminous red elixir and he proceeded to DOUSE his steak, specifically, in ketchup. He started eating it, I almost couldn't SEE this gorgeous piece of premium-cut, perfectly cooked medium rare steak under a bloody blanket of the sweet condiment. My aunt laughed at him and jokingly asked "How does the steak taste?"

His response?

"A bit overcooked... I think".

"He thinks", because he doesn't know - the upmarket, expensive palate-tingling subtle sensations that only a medium-rare steak can provide have been wholeheartedly raped and reduced to the tastes of an eighty-pence McDonalds hamburger!



So name what you regard as your OWN Food Crimes, TSR!

Scroll to see replies

Tomato Ketchup with Mashed Potato or ANY Roast.

WHY ruin such culinary effort!
Steak, anything more than medium-rare.

Super Noodles being microwaved.

Mother refusing to season anything because "salt is bad for you".

Ill think of more later :smile:

Being vegetarian
Going to a chinese and getting fried rice and/or sweet and sour chicken (like going to mcd's for a salad)
Getting a nice juicy meaty burger kebab and covering it with lettuce, tomatoes , cucumbers et cetera
Going to an indian for a korma
Tomato sauce on macaroni - my mums favourite :hmmm:
Tomato sauce on noodles - my sisters favourite :puke:
Also chips with mayonnaise, yuck.
(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 5
I hate cheese and pickle sandwiches. Separately, I love them, but the thought of putting them together makes me feel sick.
Reply 6
Salad cream with pot noodles.

What the **** was I doing with my ex :l
Reply 7
Original post by dnumberwang
Being vegetarian
Going to a chinese and getting fried rice and/or sweet and sour chicken (like going to mcd's for a salad)
Getting a nice juicy meaty burger kebab and covering it with lettuce, tomatoes , cucumbers et cetera
Going to an indian for a korma


I cringe whenever going to a proper Chinese restaurant/Japanese restaurant with my sister as she always grumbles when she doesn't see chips on the menu.

Ugh.
Reply 8
Original post by dnumberwang
Being vegetarian
Going to a chinese and getting fried rice and/or sweet and sour chicken (like going to mcd's for a salad)
Getting a nice juicy meaty burger kebab and covering it with lettuce, tomatoes , cucumbers et cetera
Going to an indian for a korma


Agree 100% with these.
Throwing out the stalk of broccoli, cabbage or cauliflower. BEST BIT.
Reply 10
Not putting salt on chips :eek:
Reply 11
Original post by chemical_bex
Tomato sauce on macaroni - my mums favourite :hmmm:
Tomato sauce on noodles - my sisters favourite :puke:
Also chips with mayonnaise, yuck.


:eek: Chips with anything other than mayonnaise!



The icky 'ban' bit of what should be an 'offee' pie.

And, not really the point of the thread, but whichever thieving bastard stole my chicken from the fridge should be taken outside and shot.
Reply 12
Ketchup on ANYTHING
Reply 13
aahh, i like pineapples on pizza! :biggrin: they're yummy! but only with ham and cheese. nothing else!
and i also do the ketchup on steak!

i find myself eating random combinations of food. i put mayonnaise on anything fried (especially on chips and chicken) and carrot sticks, add chilli sauce on my ketchup and sometimes have warm milk on cereals. :biggrin:

(i feel a lot of negs will be given to me. haha)

on topic, i don't think anyone should eat plain chips! either eat it with ketchup/mayonnaise/whatever sauce or salt, but never by itself! i can't stand people who do that. :s-smilie:

and this is probably not the same thing, but i don't get how people can eat rice with a fork. it's a bit of a hassle isn't it? i personally grew up using a spoon with rice.
Ordering a mushroom pizza and then chucking all the mushrooms out because they "do not like mushrooms".

Poor mushrooms :cry2:
(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 15
Not eating the skins in jacket potatoes

Ketchup on anything, I hate ketchup.
drowning ANYTHING in tomato ketchup
Reply 17
Cutting the ****ing crusts off your sandwiches! I can sort of sympathise with throwing the knobbies :teehee: away (but not really), but people who are that averse to their hair going curly that the cut away the miniscule ring of crust on their sandwiches deserve to be pariahs, frankly.
One that really annoys me is when people refuse to eat tomatoes but need to slather everything in ketchup. Then my brother will not eat of a plate which has a drop of water that had brocoli cooked in or bean sauce.
My cousin used to eat ketchup out the bottle. I actually was sick watching her do it once

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