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POLL : Gay rights : what if you had two dads?

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Original post by harmonize
I can't imagine it would be particularly healthy - humans are naturally brought up with two parents, one male, one female.

I don't know of any studies that cover the effect of same sex parents on a childs psyche, but I do know that a rise in single parent homes and high divorce rates is probably responsible for a rise in all aspects of crime ,as well as personality disorders and mental illness.

Whether this is the effect of having one instead of two parents, or of being brought up by one sex, I don't know.


It has been proven, through numerous studies that there is no difference in the children raised by gay/lesbian couples as opposed to straight couples. This pretty much sums it up: "Studies comparing groups of children raised by homosexual and by heterosexual parents find no developmental differences between the two groups of children in four critical areas: their intelligence, psychological adjustment, social adjustment, and popularity with friends. It is also important to realize that a parent's sexual orientation does not indicate their children's."

In essence I can see why people would assume that having two parents of the same gender would cause differences in children, but it appears that it doesn't and same-sex parents aren't comparable to single parents in that respect.
Original post by Jordenfruitbat
Yeah I did word that wrong... What I meant is why should a striaght couple be chosen over a gay couple on standards of sexuality?


Its not just about sexuality. Its about what a parent can give a child. Obviously a male and female will have more to give a child, as they are different. Different perspectives on life etc. A man is different to a woman. Women are generally more emotional and caring.
Original post by tehFrance
I'm sorry but I don't buy it for a minute.


Ok.
Original post by Jordenfruitbat
Yeah I did word that wrong I would find it a priveledge if I did manage to adopt a child someday... What I meant is why should a striaght couple be chosen over a gay couple on standards of sexuality, just because there are two fathers doesn't mean that they can't bring up a child just aswell as a straight couple.


Yes I agree with you here. Ultimately the child should go to the couple in the best situation economically, be it gay or straight. To be honest though, given the constant shortage of couples wanting to adopt there is very rarely a choice at all, let alone one between a gay and straight couple.
Original post by Lewroll
Its not just about sexuality. Its about what a parent can give a child. Obviously a male and female will have more to give a child, as they are different. Different perspectives on life etc. A man is different to a woman. Women are generally more emotional and caring.


But doesn't every person have a different perspective on life? The two gay men will provide different views to give to the child, I would say I am quite an emotional and caring person, evident in me choosing nursing as a proffesion to go into :smile:, just because I am a guy doesn't mean I can't care or be as expressive as a woman.
Original post by Jordenfruitbat
But doesn't every person have a different perspective on life? The two gay men will provide different views to give to the child, I would say I am quite an emotional and caring person, evident in me choosing nursing as a proffesion to go into :smile:, just because I am a guy doesn't mean I can't care or be as expressive as a woman.


I'm sure you are a caring person. And remember, I never said gay parents would be bad. However children need a mother. This is one of the main points of raising a child throughout humans and also in animals as well. The mother is nearly always present. Surely this tells you something? I do not doubt your parenting ability btw, and if you raise a child it will probably turn out fine.
i really don't see a problem with having two fathers. a parent is a parent, stop being so homophobic
Original post by Lewroll
However children need a mother.

Unless you have substantial proof, this shouldn't be stated as fact.
Original post by Lewroll
I'm sure you are a caring person. And remember, I never said gay parents would be bad. However children need a mother. This is one of the main points of raising a child throughout humans and also in animals as well. The mother is nearly always present. Surely this tells you something? I do not doubt your parenting ability btw, and if you raise a child it will probably turn out fine.


I don't think they do need a mother it really doesnt matter the gender of the person who brings up the child imo, my dad was the one to bring up 7 children, after my mother deserted him, and I turned out all fine and so did my brothers and sisters, I know this is sort of an anomoly, just from my own personal experiences I have done fine without a mother figure

And thanks lol :P
Original post by tehFrance
Unless you have substantial proof, this shouldn't be stated as fact.


Surely the fact that nearly every species on the planet is raised by a female in its infancy is sufficient proof. Of course you will say no, but this is a very obvious fact.

Females give birth to children. Females are very often the primary care givers. Females are designed for this. It is their biological 'role' if you will. It is a fact.
Original post by Jordenfruitbat
I don't think they do need a mother it really doesnt matter the gender of the person who brings up the child imo, my dad was the one to bring up 7 children, after my mother deserted him, and I turned out all fine and so did my brothers and sisters, I know this is sort of an anomoly, just from my own personal experiences I have done fine without a mother figure

And thanks lol :P


Notice I've being saying 'in general' throughout this thread. Humans are so diverse that it would be difficult to apply one rule to all of them. But for the majority this seems to be the truth.
Original post by Lewroll
Surely the fact that nearly every species on the planet is raised by a female in its infancy is sufficient proof. Of course you will say no, but this is a very obvious fact.

Females give birth to children. Females are very often the primary care givers. Females are designed for this. It is their biological 'role' if you will. It is a fact.

Just because women give birth to them doesn't mean that children automatically require a mother, as I have said before plenty of people have done well without a mother bringing them up.
Original post by tehFrance
Just because women give birth to them doesn't mean that children automatically require a mother, as I have said before plenty of people have done well without a mother bringing them up.


They are exceptions. There are always exceptions.
Reply 113
Avatar for harmonize
harmonize
Original post by tieyourmotherdown
It has been proven, through numerous studies that there is no difference in the children raised by gay/lesbian couples as opposed to straight couples. This pretty much sums it up: "Studies comparing groups of children raised by homosexual and by heterosexual parents find no developmental differences between the two groups of children in four critical areas: their intelligence, psychological adjustment, social adjustment, and popularity with friends. It is also important to realize that a parent's sexual orientation does not indicate their children's."

In essence I can see why people would assume that having two parents of the same gender would cause differences in children, but it appears that it doesn't and same-sex parents aren't comparable to single parents in that respect.


That isn't a study, it's a help centre, which is likely to suggest bias things lo..
Studies have shown that children brought up by same-sex couples fare just as well as those brought up by a couple of differing genders.

Frankly, as long as the parents are educated in terms of children and 'growing up'(as all parents should be but usually don't seem to be) then there is no difference regardless of the sexuality of the parents. There's not many differences between the genders apart from the obvious ones and perhaps personal experience, however all parents should ideally make the effort to understand all gender-related problems so as to provide adequate advice and guidance.
Original post by Lewroll
They are exceptions. There are always exceptions.


Exactly. Henceforth there are exceptions where children do not fare well when they have two parents of differing gender. Thus, this argument is cancelled out.
Original post by LonelySoul193
Exactly. Henceforth there are exceptions where children do not fare well when they have two parents of differing gender. Thus, this argument is cancelled out.


:facepalm:
Original post by Jordenfruitbat
It isn't hard to explain periods etc, why cant a gay dad do it? its not like we dont know what they are o_o


Why do I as a gay man have less of a right to have a child than a straight couple? :tongue:
because that's the disadvantage of being gay. i'm no homophobe, but if you want kids then get chasing that pussy. nobody would be happy when they find out they have two fathers.

and to everyone else out there, you're ****ed up. why would you be okay with having two dads? you would get bullied in school like there's no tomorrow and you will be seen as a freak by everyone. no it's not normal and no it's not right. your life would be pretty much over, bunch of weirdos.

it would be awkward as sh;t when you and your gay partner try to explain the situation to your kid when he's mature enough.

you get stabbed round here for that sh;t.
Original post by dildo baz00ka
because that's the disadvantage of being gay. i'm no homophobe, but if you want kids then get chasing that pussy. nobody would be happy when they find out they have two fathers.

and to everyone else out there, you're ****ed up. why would you be okay with having two dads? you would get bullied in school like there's no tomorrow and you will be seen as a freak by everyone. no it's not normal and no it's not right. your life would be pretty much over, bunch of weirdos.

it would be awkward as sh;t when you and your gay partner try to explain the situation to your kid when he's mature enough.

you get stabbed round here for that sh;t.


Id explain it to them from an early age, it's not that hard to tell them why they have two fathers. There is nothing wrong with having two dad's or mums, if they love you, and you love them why would you care if it was two people of the same sex? It's just the same as to explaining someone why your a single parent or a straight couple who has adopted. The more parents that are gay, the more people in society will realise its not a "bad thing".
Original post by innerhollow
In my case that would be fortunate. I would be able to confide in my parents that I'm also gay and indeed have a boyfriend, rather than playing the good little heterosexual boy act and having to keep the whole thing secret to avoid shame.


A homo engineer. Interesting.

Why are you gay if you think its shameful?
(edited 13 years ago)

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