1) he doesn't wash his hands after he pee's, and i'm the only one who has the balls to confront him about it.
"i make 15 seconds contact with my cock when i pee, relax. it's not like you're eating my dick every time you pour yourself a glass of milk or something"
erm, hello, it pretty much is.
Lots of people don't wash after they pee.
2) he showers once every THREE DAYS! this doesn't both me directly, but it just annoys me that one of my roommates is this dirty. mate, clean yourself.
If he doesn't want to wash thats really no-ones business but his own
3) he smokes cigarettes outside his window but sometimes he'd walk past us and we just get a disgusting whiff of that cancer stick.
Again if he wants to smoke its none of your business. You should be grateful that he does it outside his window.
4) he pops dirty farts around us like it's nothing then just walks off. he doesn't admit it but he definitely does this on purpose (massive cringe when you have friends over and he does this!)
Holding farts in isn't healthy. Better out than in.
5) he has a massive crackhead device by his bed (i think chavs call it "bong") which my parents saw when i gave them a tour of our flat.
Thats his bong. Leave it alone. Its, again, none of your business.
i've tried everything arghhh what can i do?
STFU for a start. None of this affects you! Leave the guy alone!
"i make 15 seconds contact with my cock when i pee, relax. it's not like you're eating my dick every time you pour yourself a glass of milk or something"