My brother is self harming...

Confront him: Absoloutely destroy him emotionally and tell him to pick up his life and stop being an idiot. If you try and support him he'll begin to think he can get away with anything and do just that. Many people will disaprove of this but its really the only way to get to him. If he's the rebellious type he'll take it in his stride but atleast you'll know that he knows that his a disgrace to you.

Confront him: Absoloutely destroy him emotionally and tell him to pick up his life and stop being an idiot. If you try and support him he'll begin to think he can get away with anything and do just that. Many people will disaprove of this but its really the only way to get to him. If he's the rebellious type he'll take it in his stride but atleast you'll know that he knows that his a disgrace to you.

are in fact very ashamed that they do it. I know that I have always worried that if my friends or family were to find out that I cut myself they would be ashamed of me or that I would worry them. .

There is a time and a place for stupidity and this is not it. I sincerely hope this was some attempt to be 'amusing and controversial' rather than actual help. This would just end up causing him to self harm more, and in a more secretive manner.

Possibly the most idiotic thing I've read on this forum so far today. Do not under any circumstances choose this option unless you want to make it much worse.

Most people will rightly disapprove of your post because it is the wrong thing to do. Destroying someone emotionally, telling them to stop being an idiot and pick themselves up is the most unhelpful thing you could possibly do to a person who self harms. It is nothing short of bullying and simply shows you are incapable of empathy or understanding. Self harm is a coping mechanism, a method of dealing with problems that a person feels unable to cope with. If you simply try to force the person to stop self harming without tackling the underlying triggers for the behaviour you can either make the self harm worse, or simply cause them to turn towards other methods of dealing with the problem i.e. drugs or alcohol.

Theres one thing addicts to best, and thats fail to quit. Im just working from experince, shunt me or not, but otherwise support simply equals another way to enforce your brother that no one cares enough to tell him he's ruining his life and his life is something more people other than him care for.

A self harmer already feels worthless and ashamed of what they are doing which is why they hide it, so if you go and tell them those things you are going to confirm the thoughts they have in their head thus resulting to them self harming to cope with the emotions they feel. This defeats the whole purpose of getting them to stop.

Seriously it really does seem like your working from personal experince here, associating it from something YOU did wrong.

Self harming is much more serious then masturbating or smoking or whatever teenagers do anymore: DO NOT WORK FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE. I've been in an extreamly similiar situation to this and when me made the idiot feel like... well defecations in that mutually accepted way he'll start to confront himself as opposed to us trying to confront him.

I am working from personal exprience of how I would feel if someone confronted me about my self harm. You do have to confront yourself and you know that it is wrong but it is soo hard to stop doing something that has become your crutch. Its like a druggie somtimes you need your fix and come hell or high water your going to get it.

Addiction is addiction: Its influenced by nothing and influences everything. If you have personal experince then you'll know the *Oh my god, I've just done it again, No more i say!* Feeling before you go off do it again. You cant cure addicts either way: Emotional support is no differant to a heated ultimatium.

I agree with you about saying your not going to do it again but you do (the amout of times ive tried to stop) but i think that it really depends on the person to see what will work for them. Some people need the in your face approach(but still not too harsh) but some need people who will take it slower.