I lost my virginity and I regret it
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I admire you for doing it OP but don't like the fact that you regret it.
It's probably the best thing that ever happened to you. You're free from the shackles of religion and tbh, you're going to be a much happier person for it.
It's probably the best thing that ever happened to you. You're free from the shackles of religion and tbh, you're going to be a much happier person for it.
Original post by *Dreaming*
You're not really muslim then are you....
note: I'n not Muslim or anything, I'm just saying....
note: I'n not Muslim or anything, I'm just saying....
Fair enough, then the same arguement can be used at Terrorists.
Muslim Terrorists aren't Muslim because they are terrorists, and the Qu'ran spreads the message of peace.
See where i'm comming from?
If your saying that i'm not a muslim, then no one can say that any terrorist anywhere is a Muslim.
Original post by crazycake93
Fair enough, then the same arguement can be used at Terrorists.
Muslim Terrorists aren't Muslim because they are terrorists, and the Qu'ran spreads the message of peace.
See where i'm comming from?
If your saying that i'm not a muslim, then no one can say that any terrorist anywhere is a Muslim.
Muslim Terrorists aren't Muslim because they are terrorists, and the Qu'ran spreads the message of peace.
See where i'm comming from?
If your saying that i'm not a muslim, then no one can say that any terrorist anywhere is a Muslim.
Yeah I've heard that argument before and I guess that's true too.
It seems as though you're more bothered about what your family and culture think than your own interests.
Most men in this day and country see a female virgin above the age of 15 as a total freak anyway, if that's any consolation. Unless your parents force you into marriage, which is illegal, chances are you won't have to worry about the status of your virginity, especially if you find someone with the same 'unreligion' as you.
I'm so sorry you're feeling this rotten!
Most men in this day and country see a female virgin above the age of 15 as a total freak anyway, if that's any consolation. Unless your parents force you into marriage, which is illegal, chances are you won't have to worry about the status of your virginity, especially if you find someone with the same 'unreligion' as you.
I'm so sorry you're feeling this rotten!
OP,
while I think that was probably misguided choice (why a ONS? I bet the sex was awful too) - I don't see the big problem. You can still marry a "Muslim" who is not a Muslim (like you). Just tell any prospective suitors in private that you are not really a muslim: If you tell them this, they should either not want to marry you (if they are Muslim), or not assume that you are a virgin (if they are not Muslim), in which case you can tell them that you are not a virgin, which will weed out the hypocrites (those who are not Muslim, do not behave like a Muslim, know that you are not Muslim, but expect you to behave like a Muslim). In which case, good riddance.
while I think that was probably misguided choice (why a ONS? I bet the sex was awful too) - I don't see the big problem. You can still marry a "Muslim" who is not a Muslim (like you). Just tell any prospective suitors in private that you are not really a muslim: If you tell them this, they should either not want to marry you (if they are Muslim), or not assume that you are a virgin (if they are not Muslim), in which case you can tell them that you are not a virgin, which will weed out the hypocrites (those who are not Muslim, do not behave like a Muslim, know that you are not Muslim, but expect you to behave like a Muslim). In which case, good riddance.
Original post by Anonymous
Last night I was out with a group of friends, I met a guy in the club and spent the night with him. I had sex with a stranger and I regret it. I really don’t know what to do. I’m from a muslim background, my parents want me to marry a muslim guy and I Don’t think any muslim guy would ever want to marry a non virgin.
I lost my virginity and regret it, you learn to live with it!
Original post by BakerStreet
You'll get over it soon. You know what they say - Time heals all wounds. Except the hymen.
LMAO
(Anon as I'm an ex-Muslim - don't want to be outed here.)
You seriously need to stop talking. She's made a mistake and she's scared - the last thing she needs right now is this sort of misogynistic abuse.
She obviously doesn't want to marry a Muslim man or live an Islamic lifestyle, and I don't blame for that one bit. The trouble is, she may not have a choice in the matter if her parents aren't above coercion.
Clearly this is a delicate situation. My advice to the OP would be not to say anything just yet. Think things through very carefully, as you need an escape route if things turn sour once you've told them you're an apostate and no longer a virgin. You'll have to deal with this eventually, as it won't be ideal marrying a Muslim man in your position. Be cautious and don't do anything that could endanger your own safety. Are you going to university or already there? It may be wise to arrange some accommodation away from your parents.
If you need some general support, I suggest you visit the CEMB (Council of Ex-Muslims of Britain) forum. Be careful not to give away any details that could get you identified. Stay safe.
Original post by silent ninja
She's admitted she's not a Muslim. If she intends to marry a Muslim guy that makes her frankly a selfish bitch of the worst sort. I can't believe some posters on here -- religious or not -- condoning her behaviour; she intends to dupe some guy and ruin his life. Losing her virginity isn't the problem. She's worried about how she is gonna back up her lies!
You seriously need to stop talking. She's made a mistake and she's scared - the last thing she needs right now is this sort of misogynistic abuse.
She obviously doesn't want to marry a Muslim man or live an Islamic lifestyle, and I don't blame for that one bit. The trouble is, she may not have a choice in the matter if her parents aren't above coercion.
Clearly this is a delicate situation. My advice to the OP would be not to say anything just yet. Think things through very carefully, as you need an escape route if things turn sour once you've told them you're an apostate and no longer a virgin. You'll have to deal with this eventually, as it won't be ideal marrying a Muslim man in your position. Be cautious and don't do anything that could endanger your own safety. Are you going to university or already there? It may be wise to arrange some accommodation away from your parents.
If you need some general support, I suggest you visit the CEMB (Council of Ex-Muslims of Britain) forum. Be careful not to give away any details that could get you identified. Stay safe.
If you regret it then just learn from your mistakes & don't do it again.
& I know people say that lying is bad (which I'm not denying) but tbh, just don't let anyone know that you've had sex.
I'm not a muslim, I'm a christian myself so I don't know if muslims go by arranged marriage, but just don't let the guy that you're going to marry know that you're a virgin. Simple as
.
& I know people say that lying is bad (which I'm not denying) but tbh, just don't let anyone know that you've had sex.
I'm not a muslim, I'm a christian myself so I don't know if muslims go by arranged marriage, but just don't let the guy that you're going to marry know that you're a virgin. Simple as
.(edited 13 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
(Anon as I'm an ex-Muslim - don't want to be outed here.)
You seriously need to stop talking. She's made a mistake and she's scared - the last thing she needs right now is this sort of misogynistic abuse.
She obviously doesn't want to marry a Muslim man or live an Islamic lifestyle, and I don't blame for that one bit. The trouble is, she may not have a choice in the matter if her parents aren't above coercion.
Clearly this is a delicate situation. My advice to the OP would be not to say anything just yet. Think things through very carefully, as you need an escape route if things turn sour once you've told them you're an apostate and no longer a virgin. You'll have to deal with this eventually, as it won't be ideal marrying a Muslim man in your position. Be cautious and don't do anything that could endanger your own safety. Are you going to university or already there? It may be wise to arrange some accommodation away from your parents.
If you need some general support, I suggest you visit the CEMB (Council of Ex-Muslims of Britain) forum. Be careful not to give away any details that could get you identified. Stay safe.
You seriously need to stop talking. She's made a mistake and she's scared - the last thing she needs right now is this sort of misogynistic abuse.
She obviously doesn't want to marry a Muslim man or live an Islamic lifestyle, and I don't blame for that one bit. The trouble is, she may not have a choice in the matter if her parents aren't above coercion.
Clearly this is a delicate situation. My advice to the OP would be not to say anything just yet. Think things through very carefully, as you need an escape route if things turn sour once you've told them you're an apostate and no longer a virgin. You'll have to deal with this eventually, as it won't be ideal marrying a Muslim man in your position. Be cautious and don't do anything that could endanger your own safety. Are you going to university or already there? It may be wise to arrange some accommodation away from your parents.
If you need some general support, I suggest you visit the CEMB (Council of Ex-Muslims of Britain) forum. Be careful not to give away any details that could get you identified. Stay safe.
When/if she gets married to a Muslim guy, you forget two people are involved. His life will be damaged too and the marriage will be based on lies (because she's said she ISN'T a Muslim). I'm sorry about the OP's predicament with her parents, but the bottom line is she can't let it go that far. It's not fair on the other person.
Misogynistic abuse? That's a red herring. If you look over my posts, what has ANY of them got to do with the fact the OP is a woman? The responses could be equally toward a guy. So you could you please stop posting nonsense and stay on point.
(edited 13 years ago)
Original post by JongKey
Having sex does not make you a slag. However, a muslim girl is only allowed to have sex after marriage and if she has it before, in slang terms, yes, you are a slag. The people who said that she was a slag say that because she's from a muslim background.
You're wrong. There's no such thing in Islam. It's wrong to call just any girl who's slept before marriage a slag. It was a one time thing and she regrets it. The issue here might be that she slept with a stranger, but still, she regrets it.
OP, it's not like every Muslim guy nowadays cares about their own virginity (ye, dey suck imo) but, even if you feel that your future husband will care about your virginity (although you regret it) he won't necessarily know. (Bleeding? Na, not every girl bleeds the first time.)
Original post by dOnTtHiNkUrSmArT
What do you want? Applause?
I don't think you've noticed, but nobody cares that you go out and ruin your life..cuz that is what it looks like you've done.
And just for the record- lying isn't going to get you anywhere..Stand up for yourself- do what you want to.
What the **** were you doing at the club anyway if you're a muslim? -.^ Don't call yourself that, youre probably embarrassing a lot of muslims that are muslims inside and out and aren't just that for the name or becuase of their parents. Maybe one day you will understand that your parents are right..
Mine are. All the time.
But then I've never met yours, so for all I know they might be abusive and ****..
I don't really care either way..
Have a nice virginity-less life ;D Aaw..you had it one minute and the next it was gone.. Poor you.
(sucker XD)
I don't think you've noticed, but nobody cares that you go out and ruin your life..cuz that is what it looks like you've done.
And just for the record- lying isn't going to get you anywhere..Stand up for yourself- do what you want to.
What the **** were you doing at the club anyway if you're a muslim? -.^ Don't call yourself that, youre probably embarrassing a lot of muslims that are muslims inside and out and aren't just that for the name or becuase of their parents. Maybe one day you will understand that your parents are right..
Mine are. All the time.
But then I've never met yours, so for all I know they might be abusive and ****..
I don't really care either way..
Have a nice virginity-less life ;D Aaw..you had it one minute and the next it was gone.. Poor you.
(sucker XD)
She didn't once call herself a 'Muslim'. She said that she was from a 'Muslim background' and that she was worried that no Muslim would want her after this little escapade.
I doubt you slating her is going to achieve anything, and so I'd advise you to just take your hateful, outdated views elsewhere.
She may be a bad Muslim, but at least she isn't a bad person, unlike you from what you have written. Do you take pleasure from the misfortunes of others?
Astagfirullah
Original post by Jelkin
Now, I think family is super, super important, but if there's anything worth losing them over it's who you marry. The person you will marry will be your life partner - someone you stay with until you die. This person should be the closest person to you in the world. If you have to pretend to be something you're not for him, how can you marry him?
Just how often do you think this is true?
Most young people atleast in the UK end up having more than one partner over their life times, so pretending that it is the one true love the family are depriving the person of is not true.
Many Muslims these days are not too pratisicing and will have sex before marriage, so that may not be as big an issue these days.
As for marrying a Muslim guy, as long as she is upfront that she doesn't believe.... it is important that she does not dupe someone into a life of sorrow for her own selfish reasons.
(edited 13 years ago)
@ op - there are LOADS of muslim dudes that liek to play religious when it suits but sleep about, and prob would shag their gf before marraige anyhow but keep it discreet. also loads of muslim dudes get a girl, quickly say nikah, shag her then do the muslim 'i divorce you ' thing and move to the next girl. just get a guy who isnt a proper muslim. there are tonnes. they are the ones with baggy pants showing half their undies and weird shaved beards saying 'bruv, i'll meet ya down there right, i gotta go pray nahh innit, then we go check out some fit birrrdzzz'
too true. if guys are gonna have double standards about it, just lie. most guys cant tell and the blood thing is a myth.
Original post by Tom78
pretend it never happend, easy for some, may not be for you
too true. if guys are gonna have double standards about it, just lie. most guys cant tell and the blood thing is a myth.
Original post by silent ninja
You gave yourself away very cheap. Did you feel that dignity die away? All for just a few moments? Sex ain't the be all.
Edit: you're not a Muslim anyway so don't deceive a Muslim guy in to a fake marriage and ruin his life too. Have some balls and stand up to your parents or move out.
Edit: you're not a Muslim anyway so don't deceive a Muslim guy in to a fake marriage and ruin his life too. Have some balls and stand up to your parents or move out.
Ruin his life? Shut up. It's these old-fashioned values that give Islam a bad name on these forums.
_Kar.
Original post by Kareir
Ruin his life? Shut up. It's these old-fashioned values that give Islam a bad name on these forums.
_Kar.
_Kar.
Of course. Old fashioned? Since when is a Muslim not being allowed to marry a non-muslim old fashioned? Muslims can only marry Muslims and under conditions Christians and Jews. The OP is not a Muslim so get your facts straight please. She will be ruining his life if she isn't straight up about this.
Old fashioned? You sound like an internet sheikh in the making lol
There is only one Islam. The values haven't changed an iota since day 1.
Original post by shinytoy
@ op - there are LOADS of muslim dudes that liek to play religious when it suits but sleep about, and prob would shag their gf before marraige anyhow but keep it discreet. also loads of muslim dudes get a girl, quickly say nikah, shag her then do the muslim 'i divorce you ' thing and move to the next girl. just get a guy who isnt a proper muslim. there are tonnes. they are the ones with baggy pants showing half their undies and weird shaved beards saying 'bruv, i'll meet ya down there right, i gotta go pray nahh innit, then we go check out some fit birrrdzzz'
too true. if guys are gonna have double standards about it, just lie. most guys cant tell and the blood thing is a myth.
too true. if guys are gonna have double standards about it, just lie. most guys cant tell and the blood thing is a myth.
Now who's being disrespectful to the OP? You want her to marry trash? lol Does the person you describe sound like husband material?
(edited 13 years ago)
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