The Student Room Group

Overdue virgins: what do your parents think of your condition?

Scroll to see replies

Reply 20
Original post by Anonymous
I was inspired by the "How did your parents find out about you losing your virginity" thread here: http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1579261

Basically what I'm wondering is what do the parents of people who are overdue virgins (lets define that as people who have had much less/no experience at an age when most people have done it or at least something) think of them and do they even know about your "condition"?

I'm personally 22 and the ultimate virgin: never kissed a girl, never had a gf and still a virgin obviously.

I am not sure if my parents are 100% sure of the extent of my virginity but they've got some clues: when I'm home (though I study in the UK, I'm not from here) I never go out, almost never meet up with friends or anything like that so I'm home constantly so they are well aware of my complete and utter lack of a social life and hence no contact with females. I have always been like this and I never hid anything from my parents: if they asked me something I'd answer it directly.

While at uni we still talk and though its hard for them to know what exactly I do, I think they are vaguely aware of the fact that I don't really go out much.
Sometimes they jokingly ask if I have a girl or not and I answer no and thats about the extent of their inquisitions into my romantic life.
Occasionally my dad has joked about my lack of experience with girls (I don't know if he knows the full picture but he's got an idea) but thats about it, mom never brings the topic up.

What about the rest of you virgins out there?

My parents know I'm a virgin, they know the closest thing to kissing I've ever done is a peck on the cheek. And so do my friends.

None of them are extremely concerned. They know that my mission in life isn't to get laid, so they don't cry over it.
Reply 21
well i'm not a virgin but i've never had a boyfriend and my dad thinks i am a complete virgin. he's never said anything but he talks to me as if i'm about twelve and like scared of boys. it's really annoying and i feel like somehow revealing how many boys i've actually slept with though obviously i can't as it's a bit weird. as for my mum...we had an explicit sex discussion the other day and she knows everything haha.
I think my parents would be rather alarmed if they thought I wasn't a virgin, tbh. They automatically assume I am :biggrin:

That said, my dad did think I was having an affair with my tutorial partner and my mum is aware that some people thought there was something going on with a tutor :ninja:
I don't talk to my parents about sex. :sick:
STILL a virgin. but by choice.

When i had a boyfriend. my dad barely talked to me as he kept saying "now that you've lost your innocence..."

and i was like, "really! nothing to worry about... " eugh awkward.
Not one anymore but I remember the relief in my dad's voice when I (aged 20, 2nd year of uni) mentioned my first gf on the phone. My mum couldn't care less, but he's always been worried about how introverted & socially awkward I am.
Reply 26
Original post by abc101

I know a girl whose mum constantly ribs her for being a virgin - like, why?! Why would you not want your daughter to be a virgin?!


Maybe it's because they're missing out on life?

The days when if your daughter lost her virginity before marriage she was damaged goods and her "value" was depreciated as if she was a piece of property should be long gone.

I feel sorry for the girls whose parents try to perpetuate their virginity, basically implying that she's an object and property.
Reply 27
I'm 21 and still a virgin. I'm not sure if my parents know for sure though, as there was a time in my life when I was really messed up in the head and would go out a lot on weekends and kiss boys, sometimes even go home with them. Although I never went beyond kissing with any of these guys, because some of them happened to be my brothers friends my whole family found out about it and probably assumed I did what normal people do when they go home with someone and slept with them. My mum did say to me recently though that I should go for a pap smear test 'as you can still get cancer even if you've never had sex' so maybe they know me better than I think they do. My mum does occasionally say 'oooh he would make a good boyfriend' or suggest something about a boyfriend but I dont think they really care that much when it comes down to it.
Reply 28
And erm.....at what point does one become overdue?

Spoiler

Reply 29
I'm a little overdue. 17.

Eh, my Dad lost it younger, and so did my brother, so I felt some weight of expectation, especially from my brother. Ironic now though, since I've found someone I love being with, but because she's younger it's an awkward situation with regards to coitus :tongue:
Reply 30
Original post by Stefan1991
Maybe it's because they're missing out on life?

The days when if your daughter lost her virginity before marriage she was damaged goods and her "value" was depreciated as if she was a piece of property should be long gone.

I feel sorry for the girls whose parents try to perpetuate their virginity, basically implying that she's an object and property.


You think that being a virgin = missing out on life?

If so, your life must be pretty pathetic.
Reply 31
Original post by abc101
You think that being a virgin = missing out on life?

If so, your life must be pretty pathetic.


I think sex/romance/love/relationships is a part of life so a more accurate statement would be that one is missing out on a part of life.

As a 22 year old virgin with no experience with females I feel that there is a bunch of things I could be doing in this sector of life and there's a lot more fun/experiences that I could be having but am not.
Reply 32
i'm eighteen and I'm virgin, my mother is the opposite to me she had my brother when she was 14, and she had me when she was 16, so she is always like 'you are wasting yourself', hahaha, but i don't care
Condition :biggrin:

I bet most parents wouldnt know tbh
(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 34
Original post by Zottula
And erm.....at what point does one become overdue?

Spoiler




When they send you one of those angry letters in the post charging you 20p a day and a couple of pounds a day a couple of weeks after that.
Reply 35
I think their relieved that I'm a virgin, they're under the impression my sister sleeps around a lot as she chased a lot of boys when she was in her teens and hasn't kept a boyfriend beyond 6-7 months and she's 27, didn't help when my mum walked into her flat on two occasions and there was a naked guy she didn't know in my sister's bed. I'm the complete opposite to her, at my age my sister was trying to get pregnant.

It was hilarious when my parents found out about my brother losing his, his mate walked through the door and said to my brother "Heard you lost your virginity mate, well done, I'm still trying to find mine." My mum overheard this and was like :eek:
Reply 36
Original post by Jamil1987
My parents are completely aware of me being a virgin, I don't go out much, and when I do go out I don't make ne effort, messed up hair, un-ironed clothes etc etc so they knowwww I wont be getting it in LOL


This just made me lol
some of us might approve of the messy look :sexface:

:lol:
I'm nineteen and still a virgin - my mum knows as she knows I've never been in a relationship, she's not bothered. Being Catholic it's pretty accepted in our whole family that sex is for after you're married anyway ... Dad doesn't know anything about me, or not a lot anyway so he doesn't know. Wouldn't talk to him about sex anyway!
Reply 38
Original post by blush.ox
This just made me lol
some of us might approve of the messy look :sexface:

:lol:


wow really, well then u can holla ne tym ;-)
Reply 39
My mum does actually occasionally tell me that I need to get laid (I'm 18) and has been saying it every now and then since I was like 15 ahaha

I don't think she's too worried tbh because she knows I'm not exactly guy mad and don't go out with anyone who asks me so she gets that I haven't exactly had any real opportunity.

She probably more concerned about my much older brothers who both may or may not be virgins but are both losers.

Quick Reply

Latest