What's he doing? and why?
we've been in a LDR for a few years, he sees me as marriage material 
but lately i've been quite miserable because of things he does in spite of me expressing my dislike for them
i tried talking to him, it doesn't get resolved, says i'm jealous etc...
i've found and gone past my limit, and the place i'm in right now is pretty happy-not-giving-one, i'm still young, i'll let things roll
he says he loves me, sees a future together but i realise it's all blahblah to some extent
now the situation:
last night we were talking on the phone at night, i was feeling pretty mellow haha
he starts
-do you love me?
-yees
-are we gonna get married?
-yees
-are we gonna have kids?
-yeeees
-i love you too
now im thinking, er why is he asking stuff like this? does he want to feel reassured? so that he can think it's fine to carry on what he's doing and i'll still take it?
i feel like i'm just saying "yes" just because he expects me to (even though i realise nothing is carved in stone)
but lately i've been quite miserable because of things he does in spite of me expressing my dislike for them
i tried talking to him, it doesn't get resolved, says i'm jealous etc...
i've found and gone past my limit, and the place i'm in right now is pretty happy-not-giving-one, i'm still young, i'll let things roll
he says he loves me, sees a future together but i realise it's all blahblah to some extent
now the situation:
last night we were talking on the phone at night, i was feeling pretty mellow haha
he starts
-do you love me?
-yees
-are we gonna get married?
-yees
-are we gonna have kids?
-yeeees
-i love you too
now im thinking, er why is he asking stuff like this? does he want to feel reassured? so that he can think it's fine to carry on what he's doing and i'll still take it?
i feel like i'm just saying "yes" just because he expects me to (even though i realise nothing is carved in stone)
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Man up bro
Original post by Economister
Man up bro
thanks bro
You're in a LDR talking about marriage and kids? How long have you been with him, was it always a LDR?
If I was you I wouldn't want to think about marriage and kids, especially as you are 'still young'. But maybe that it just me
If I was you I wouldn't want to think about marriage and kids, especially as you are 'still young'. But maybe that it just me
How old are you?
I'm asking because I would be like WHAT THE HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
if I had a conversation like that...such serious questions asked so casually!
I'm asking because I would be like WHAT THE HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
if I had a conversation like that...such serious questions asked so casually!well if you disagree with any of the questions he asked, you could change yes to a no 
. You cant just keep pleasing him and sacrifice yourself.
Why dont you ask him whats the reason for all these questions?
. You cant just keep pleasing him and sacrifice yourself. Why dont you ask him whats the reason for all these questions?
Maybe you keep asking him and it's annoying him. Live for the moment. He enjoys your company and loves you perhaps but is sick of this reassurance seeking behaviour.
Original post by rugbyladosc
You're in a LDR talking about marriage and kids? How long have you been with him, was it always a LDR?
If I was you I wouldn't want to think about marriage and kids, especially as you are 'still young'. But maybe that it just me
If I was you I wouldn't want to think about marriage and kids, especially as you are 'still young'. But maybe that it just me
yes, but we knew each other beforehand
it's 3 years soon
he's talking about the future, i'm just smiling and nodding as it were
it's like his actions say that he doesn't take me that seriously, or as seriously as i take him (maybe it's just the way i'm seeing it), but the stuff he says... well you saw.
Original post by Potential Trigger
Maybe you keep asking him and it's annoying him. Live for the moment. He enjoys your company and loves you perhaps but is sick of this reassurance seeking behaviour.
LOL i don't keep asking him, i'm the not the crazy romantic kind of girl, i haven't got a huge book full of wedding ideas
he is, though, a "romantic" haa
Original post by Anonymous
yes, but we knew each other beforehand
it's 3 years soon
he's talking about the future, i'm just smiling and nodding as it were
it's like his actions say that he doesn't take me that seriously, or as seriously as i take him (maybe it's just the way i'm seeing it), but the stuff he says... well you saw.
it's 3 years soon
he's talking about the future, i'm just smiling and nodding as it were
it's like his actions say that he doesn't take me that seriously, or as seriously as i take him (maybe it's just the way i'm seeing it), but the stuff he says... well you saw.
Ask him to consider you? I don't really see the dilemma here. Are you considering ending it?
Original post by Potential Trigger
Maybe you keep asking him and it's annoying him. Live for the moment. He enjoys your company and loves you perhaps but is sick of this reassurance seeking behaviour.
just to clarify, he keeps asking me, i don't even mention it, i'm the grounded one
i understand it's silly to make promises years in the future, and i don't
Original post by rugbyladosc
Ask him to consider you? I don't really see the dilemma here. Are you considering ending it?
i don't know, perhaps...
i just don't understand the opposite words and actions
i mentioned and mentioned it, he told me not to "have a go" at him anymore
in all honesty, i don't feel jealous, i feel a bit betrayed.. and the fact he's carrying it on makes me think he doesn't care that much for the relationship and doesn't respect me
so why say all the stuff about marriage and kids??!?!?
Original post by loling909
You sound a little crazy. Haha, just a little bit.
why?
to make it clear, i'm not the one asking if we're gonna get married
Original post by Anonymous
why?
to make it clear, i'm not the one asking if we're gonna get married
to make it clear, i'm not the one asking if we're gonna get married
LOL I am so sorry, my posts are getting posted in the wrong threads.
No you're not crazy. 
I don't see a problem with your bf asking you those questions tbh...were you a little freaked out when he asked you..?(edited 13 years ago)
Have I missed something? What is it that he's doing that makes you feel betrayed?
Me and my bf have only ever joked about getting married and having kids cause we both know it's a bit too soon to be planning the rest of our lives (if we're even together). With the whole marriage and kids things, just tell him how you feel. Just say that you'd rather focus on what's happening now rather than something that might not happen.
Me and my bf have only ever joked about getting married and having kids cause we both know it's a bit too soon to be planning the rest of our lives (if we're even together). With the whole marriage and kids things, just tell him how you feel. Just say that you'd rather focus on what's happening now rather than something that might not happen.
the fuuucckkkk?
Original post by Anonymous
it's like his actions say that he doesn't take me that seriously, or as seriously as i take him (maybe it's just the way i'm seeing it), but the stuff he says... well you saw.
it's like his actions say that he doesn't take me that seriously, or as seriously as i take him (maybe it's just the way i'm seeing it), but the stuff he says... well you saw.
Surely he takes you seriously if he's asking you about marriage and kids?
Original post by converselove
Have I missed something? What is it that he's doing that makes you feel betrayed?
Me and my bf have only ever joked about getting married and having kids cause we both know it's a bit too soon to be planning the rest of our lives (if we're even together). With the whole marriage and kids things, just tell him how you feel. Just say that you'd rather focus on what's happening now rather than something that might not happen.
Me and my bf have only ever joked about getting married and having kids cause we both know it's a bit too soon to be planning the rest of our lives (if we're even together). With the whole marriage and kids things, just tell him how you feel. Just say that you'd rather focus on what's happening now rather than something that might not happen.
long story.. giving other females excessive (in my opinion) attention
on the other hand, my views might be 19th century.......
idk.. i don't think he's joking.
thank you.
Original post by Anonymous
but lately i've been quite miserable because of things he does in spite of me expressing my dislike for them
i tried talking to him, it doesn't get resolved, says i'm jealous etc...
)
i tried talking to him, it doesn't get resolved, says i'm jealous etc...
)
Ok seems like I've missed something? Why's he calling you jealous?
You can PM if you want to talk about your situation for advice...cause you're thread is confusing me lol
(edited 13 years ago)
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