If your partner had a one night stand, would you dump them or forgive them?

If you're in a monogamous relationship with someone and you find out they had a one night stand with a random stranger who they will never see again, would you dump them? Or would you forgive them and simply view it as a one off incident?

I mean a one night stand is different than a full blown affair where your partner has been cheating for months behind your back.

What are your thoughts on this?

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Reply 1

sil3nt_cha0s

Original post by Raving_Hippy

Yeah but how would you know it was just a one night stand?

Reply 2

Ethereal

Why is a ONS different to continued cheating?

Reply 3

Munchies-YumYum

Dump that b**** mate, if she's unable to close her legs for a few hours.

I'd dump.

I wouldn't be able to trust him again. Dump.

dump!

depends on how it happened and whether they were honest and the whole situation really

Reply 8

.Scout.

Dump. I have too much self respect to be with someone that doesn't respect me back

Reply 9

Boo!xx

dump, unless he had a really good reason

Dump. No exceptions.

Original post by Ethereal

Why is a ONS different to continued cheating?

Exactly! A lot of people these days only seem to view cheating as having an emotional attachment to more than one partner. I watched a debate on 'The Wright Stuff' a while back basically posing a similar question - 'If your partner slept with a prostitute, would you forgive them?' and I was absolutely shocked at the amount of people that said they would because there was no emotional involvement.

Reply 12

Alpharius

I don't trust easily.

If someone breaks that trust, they won't get it back.

Dumpage.

Dumb that hoe.

Original post by Ethereal

Why is a ONS different to continued cheating?

Are you serious? An one-night stand may be a one-time mistake. Continued cheating implies that the person didn't regret it afterwards. I don't know, it's way different.

Not saying having a ONS while in a relationship is acceptable, though.

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 15

ScottishShortiex

Original post by Raving_Hippy

I may be wrong here, but are you trying to dig yourself out of a hole here and make youself feel less guilty/look better (I'm assuming that you are the person who cheated) ??

I don't condone any cheating - ONS or affair - because I think there's no need for them. If you're not happy with your relationship, then try to sort it out or end the relationship...don't cheat on them!

Of course there's differences between them. ONS is purely physical and usually happens when drunk, whereas an affair is not only physical but also emotional (some may not agree with me) I would say that full-blown affairs are worse, but I've never actually experienced either, however if my bf cheated on me at all, I don't know if I could trust them again!

Reply 16

Charlottelisabeth

No I would dump them definately. If I really loved them and they begged for forgiveness and truly proved that they were sorry then I might poss get back together with them after a looooong break from them. I know I'd would dump them initially but who knows if I'd get back with them. I'll never know until it happens and every situation is different, obviously here's hoping it never happen to me lol!

It would be really really mega hard to trust them again. Plus if they weren't planning on telling me and I found out from someone else then the chances of me wanting to ever get back together with them would be so low.

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 17

disco1000

Original post by Raving_Hippy

I hate all this totally predictable and arbritary, "dump the bitch and move on" bull**** being **** out of standard relationship advice textbook abiding members. Seriously, offer some good advice and back up the reasons.

There are a number of competing factors here. Your clearly in a vulnerable, jealous and hurt position right now. The only way to deal with this adequately is to take a step back and view it rationally.

You guys agreed to a monogamous relationship, they broke the terms you set out. How and why? the details are and always will be important? did you do something in particular to make them feel unloved or unwanted? what made them feel the need to do that? can you really trust them not to do it again and continue to abide by the old contract, do you personally feel like you can continue with this monogamy after what you've found out?
did they tell you, or did you find out, that says a lot about honesty.

I'd say re-evaluate the relationship, may be best leaving it, or taking a step back making it more casual, because if your going to go for it, you should through your whole weight into it and that can go both ways, but it goes both ways heavy.