Have you witnessed bullying at University?

So, have you witnessed any bullying at uni? Have you been bullied or seen someone get bullied?

I guess it will depend on what University, in a way. Imo bullying idiots get filtered out as you go up the education ladder and after that depending on the level of grades to get into Uni. So someone at Durham, say, is a lot less likely to get bullied than someone at TVU.

This is just my opinion. Feel free to open a discussion.

Nope.

No.

I've noticed something odd as I've got older. When you're younger, people who appear different (in a good way) are ostracised and victimised. However when you get older, it seems that people embrace those who are different. At least, that's what I've observed by and large.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

Sorry about the neatness of my OP. I'm typing on an iPhone and it's very hard to make a proper, readable post. :/

And also sorry if I pissed anyone at TVU off.

Reply 4

j.laurence

Once but he was a ***** who got kicked out of uni, just like all bullies who are low moralled bigots

Reply 5

The_Lonely_Goatherd

20

I got bullied by one guy. He nearly got chucked out for it but I said I didn't want that, so he stayed :yes:

Reply 6

qwerty_mad

13

Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd

I got bullied by one guy. He nearly got chucked out for it but I said I didn't want that, so he stayed :yes:

Bullying at Oxford, no?

Reply 7

The_Lonely_Goatherd

20

Original post by qwerty_mad

Bullying at Oxford, no?

Indeed. Just by one person. It was rather complex and more appalling-foot-in-mouth-and-serious-ignorance and I didn't really think of it as bullying but when my tutor found out, he hit the roof and called it bullying. It was all dealt with very efficiently and I'm still very good friends with the guy now :smile:

Reply 8

Anonymous #2

i'm at Oxford, and one guy did get picked on a fair bit as he found it really hard to fit in. Its easy to look down on such behavior, but when this guy is making very open passes a lots of girls and is literally the most mal-co-oridinated person you have ever seen, it is hard not to make jokes at his expense, then other jokes... and before you know it what you are doing is effectively bullying and excluding him.

Fortunately, we were quite self-critical and once we realized this was out of order stopped doing it, although you could argue the damage was already done.

Reply 9

Vozhak

9

No i have not thankfully, because if i did said bully would find out what the statement; "payback is a b**** means"

I cannot stand bullying it is disgusting, inhumane and cowardly.

Reply 10

The_Lonely_Goatherd

20

Original post by Anonymous

i'm at Oxford, and one guy did get picked on a fair bit as he found it really hard to fit in. Its easy to look down on such behavior, but when this guy is making very open passes a lots of girls and is literally the most mal-co-oridinated person you have ever seen, it is hard not to make jokes at his expense, then other jokes... and before you know it what you are doing is effectively bullying and excluding him.

Fortunately, we were quite self-critical and once we realized this was out of order stopped doing it, although you could argue the damage was already done.

You're not at Lincoln by any chance? I can think of someone who left there in June who could possibly fit the bill. He semi-stalked me :ninja:

Reply 11

whyumadtho

14

Not directly, but I've overheard some people making snide comments about someone's weight behind their back.

Reply 12

Joinedup

20

Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd

Indeed. Just by one person. It was rather complex and more appalling-foot-in-mouth-and-serious-ignorance and I didn't really think of it as bullying but when my tutor found out, he hit the roof and called it bullying. It was all dealt with very efficiently and I'm still very good friends with the guy now :smile:

How does something like that happen - tutorial group or something?
---
anyway and imo - generally you choose who you associate with in the teaching areas of the uni ... things *can* definitely get a bit off colour in the accommodation though and I'd describe some of what I've seen taking place there as bullying - constantly vandalising other peoples rooms, fridge contents etc.

I guess stuff could follow you into uni from your accomm if you were doing some of the same modules as the people you lived with.

Reply 13

Anonymous #2

Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd

You're not at Lincoln by any chance? I can think of someone who left there in June who could possibly fit the bill. He semi-stalked me :ninja:

No. He was pretty much unaware of it happening, and he is still here getting on fine as far as i know. It was just one of those cases where one guy becomes the butt of all the jokes and after a while in become a bit unsavoury.

Reply 14

The_Lonely_Goatherd

20

Original post by Joinedup

How does something like that happen - tutorial group or something?
---
anyway and imo - generally you choose who you associate with in the teaching areas of the uni ... things *can* definitely get a bit off colour in the accommodation though and I'd describe some of what I've seen taking place there as bullying - constantly vandalising other peoples rooms, fridge contents etc.

I guess stuff could follow you into uni from your accomm if you were doing some of the same modules as the people you lived with.

Like I say, complex. Tutorials factored into it but we also lived next door to each other, socialised a lot and I propped him up throughout first year, so there wasn't much escape and plenty of opportunity. He had an inferiority complex and the need to be the best quickly manifested itself into a forceful superiority complex. He also initially took issue with my getting in without the grades :biggrin:

no...

Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd

Like I say, complex. Tutorials factored into it but we also lived next door to each other, socialised a lot and I propped him up throughout first year, so there wasn't much escape and plenty of opportunity. He had an inferiority complex and the need to be the best quickly manifested itself into a forceful superiority complex. He also initially took issue with my getting in without the grades :biggrin:

Might vary - I can imagine oxbridge and some others including modern campus unis have the potential to turn into nasty little pressure-cookers. Never been to one of them.
City unis have a pressure valve in that it's dead easy to avoid the people you don't like, except the accomm which you're largely stuck with unless things go totally ballistic and you can get someone turfed.

anyway I'm glad it's over for you.

Reply 17

The_Lonely_Goatherd

20

Original post by Joinedup

Might vary - I can imagine oxbridge and some others including modern campus unis have the potential to turn into nasty little pressure-cookers. Never been to one of them.
City unis have a pressure valve in that it's dead easy to avoid the people you don't like, except the accomm which you're largely stuck with unless things go totally ballistic and you can get someone turfed.

anyway I'm glad it's over for you.

With Oxbridge at least (though I imagine it would be the same elsewhere), it's to an extent dependent on your personality. It can become a pressure cooker but only if you let it. Equally you don't have to socialise within college or spend much time there at all if you don't want to. Lectures, tutorials/supervisions and seminars are obviously more tricky :yes:

I'm a bit bitter about it but you learn from those things :yes:

Reply 18

MagicNMedicine

20

Original post by Joinedup

Might vary - I can imagine oxbridge and some others including modern campus unis have the potential to turn into nasty little pressure-cookers. Never been to one of them.
City unis have a pressure valve in that it's dead easy to avoid the people you don't like, except the accomm which you're largely stuck with unless things go totally ballistic and you can get someone turfed.

Yes this rule holds for bullying in general. Bullying only really happens when somebody is trapped in a group that they have to see all the time (which is why it happens in schools and in workplaces). The bully needs to have some form of position where the victim can't avoid them which is why the idea scenario for a bully is to be somebody's boss at work, because they already have a relationship where the victim has to be their subordinate, so they can lord it over them.

Big unis have the advantage of lots of people and so people have social flexibility, if somebody starts picking on you then you can just drift away and spend time with other people. Also I think as has been pointed out, university age students are generally more open minded and less inclined to pick on people for 'differences'.

With some people though, their social position can change from victim to bully over time. I went to a school with a 6th form attached, in Year 7 and 8 there was a shy ginger haired lad who was a bit of a geek who used to get picked on by some of the others. I didn't know him that well but I remember sticking up for him a few times because he was being picked on because he was clever and hard working, just a bit timid. Now fast forward to Yr 12/13 and this lad is in my A level Further Maths class, which was a small class full mainly of maths geeks, and as the cleverest in the group with a place at Cambridge under his belt, he enjoyed social status at the top of the pecking order. Now I wasn't bad at maths, he would get 97 and 98 in the A level modules and I'd be getting say 85 to 90, but I noticed this lad started making fun of me as 6th form progressed, his jokes basically centred around the idea that I would spend a lifetime working in MacDonalds due to my lack of mathematical ability. It didn't bother me because I still saw him as a social dweeb and it was hilarious watching how when he had a few drinks inside him, he took his new confidence as being king of the maths class, to arrogantly trying to think he was a pimp with the ladies, which always had disastrous effects. So I was hardly bothered about being bullied by him I just used to take the mick about it to my other mates.

But I bet you when this lad arrived at Cambridge, he would have been the type to quickly start being cruel to others, if his high ability had attracted respect from his peers. I reckon you see this on TSR bullying as well with the types who will come on the internet to make fun of other users because of the university they are at etc. Sometimes these types of high academic ability university bullies, will have been kids who were picked on by their peers for being geeks through school and are now revelling in the power.