Please stick with this.
Two nights ago i went out with some friends. It was a very heavy night and I was told i had something like the equivalent to 15 pints in beer and vodka. After we left, my memory gets very hazy. I remember i went separate ways to my friends and then it blacks out. The next thing i remember is being in a car talking to this guy, a third year student (i'm first year). Now, as i recall i think he was helping me out because i was falling about. I have cuts round most of my body and my hands hurt from breaking the falls, so i guess i couldn't stand up.
Anyway, i started talking to him and i broke down crying. I'm having issues with a break up and am probably gay and not dealing with it very well. So i remember the talking and him being very nice about it. He then must have drove me back to his and i was in his bed. He started doing stuff but I remember not wanting to, so i asked him to stop. I very vaguely remember him saying that it was not a problem and he didn't mind. When I woke up he was asleep in the opposite direction, which makes me think he probably honoured that request. I got up, had a brief small talk and left embarrassingly.
As i remember him trying and me asking him to stop and him stopping (at least for then), it seems unlikely that he could've had sex with me without me remembering. And he did seem a very nice guy. But the things that don't add up:
1. What was he doing at 3am sober in the city (he was driving so guessing he wasn't drunk
2. My arse is sore. It feels like a bruise from when i was falling over which is most likely, but even still it doesn't hurt if i push on the bone at the top (where the pain is).
3. My memory is really bad. Now that could easily be the 15 pints, or he could've saw me in the club.
4. It's a massive coincidence that the guy that saw me in a state and helped me was gay. More likely that at 3am he's around clubs because there are vulnerable guys surely.
5. I do have memory flashes of him trying it on a few more times, and in the morning he was rubbing my leg before i nudged him to stop.
6. The decent thing to do if you had a car would be to ask me where I lived and take me there. I couldn't stand up, so even if he didn't do anything there is a sinister feel i can't shake.
I might be being melodramatic i don't know. I also feel it's my fault. 15 pints is just silly. What do you think?