The Student Room Group

Help - male perspective appreciated but views from ladies welcome too :)

Hello all.

I have a relationship question. So I suppose this is the right place to post it. It's about saying the 'three words'. I want to say them to my boyfriend but I'm worried about scaring him off. We've been together 'officialI ly' for 7 months but unofficially for about a year. So two questions really:

1. Should the girl say it first? Or should wait for him?
2. Is it too soon - is it likely he'll be scared off?

We're both 22 if that helps.

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Reply 1
erm, do you love him? If you do I dont see why not :]
Reply 2
It's really hard to say as we don't know the guy.

7 months is a reasonable amount of time. If you seriously do love him - then just go for it. :smile:
Reply 3
If you feel you love him, tell him.

There's nothing unusual about telling somebody you love them after 7 months.

And no, it doesn't matter if the girl says it first. If anything, i'd be like get in there LAD :sexface:
Youve been together for 7 months and havent said it yet?

Have you only seen him once in that time?
if you truly feel like that then say it.

some of my relationships have gone on longer than that and i've never felt it and would have found it a bit weird if my gf said it to me. but i've had other relationships where it would be much more appropiate. only you can decide whether its the right time or not
(edited 12 years ago)
Not the L word!! :eek:
Original post by Anonymous
Hello all.

I have a relationship question. So I suppose this is the right place to post it. It's about saying the 'three words'. I want to say them to my boyfriend but I'm worried about scaring him off. We've been together 'officialI ly' for 7 months but unofficially for about a year. So two questions really:

1. Should the girl say it first? Or should wait for him?
2. Is it too soon - is it likely he'll be scared off?

We're both 22 if that helps.


Cheeeeeeeseeeeeeee

You're clearly not ready, if you was ready you wouldn't need some students to make a decision for you. You'll know when it's right because it will be spontaneous and you won't have time to ask anyone if it's the right time.
a) If a girl feels it first, she should say it first. Honesty is important in a relationship. And I've heard of no "conventions" on this point.

b) As the Smiths said, "How soon is now?". If you feel it, then it's not "too soon", people have loved at first sight before now (myself included). So no, by any definition it isn't.

And no, the fact you're both 22 makes no difference.

Tell him...if he's worth loving, he'll be delighted.
Reply 9
Go for it.
I'm surprised no one has said it after 7 months- 1 year together tbh :s-smilie:
if you love him dont be afraid to tell him.
Reply 12
so hes your boyfriend??

and you havn;t sed i loveyou.
Reply 13
Just say "I love U2". If he gets freaked out say you were talking about the band....
Maybe you could try to steer the conversation in the direction a few times before you say it? That way it won't seem like too much of a shock when you do say it.
I know people who have dropped the L-bomb after 7 weeks so i wouldn't worry about it :smile: personally my boyfriend and i said it after about 7 months too although he said it first, but if its on your mind, id take a pretty good guess that its on his mind too :smile:
Original post by DontJudge
so hes your boyfriend??

and you havn;t sed i loveyou.


That was the general gist of the OP, yes. Well done.
Would you regret it if you didn't say it? I'd think of it in those terms.
Reply 18
Original post by Nick1sHere
Youve been together for 7 months and havent said it yet?

Have you only seen him once in that time?


I think we're both a bit crap about talking about our feelings. It took us long enough to get together lol.
Reply 19
Original post by Retrodiction
That was the general gist of the OP, yes. Well done.


no you idiot im basically saying thats like well weird..

its like saying..you gotofficially married in a church and everything... then not call them your husband!!

weird!!!!

:angry:

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