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Is it bad that if I got pregnant, the scariest thing would be my boyfriend?

Telling him and his reaction....I'm on the pill so hopefully it will never happen, but he can get very angry. He doesn't get violent he just shouts. He would blame me. He told me "If you get pregnant, you WILL get rid of it." We were talking and I realized that the main reason I would be scared is cause of him. My parents would support me whatever and so would everyone else.

This is a non-issue I guess as I'm on the pill, but I'm always thinking "I have to take it at the same time everyday because of what he would do if anything ever want wrong". Is that bad for me to think that?

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Reply 1
A little bit if you see this being a long-term thing. Your partner scaring you is generally not a healthy sign in any relationship.
Reply 2
He sounds like a prat. It takes two to tango, it's just as much his fault as yours if you do get pregnant.

He has no right telling you what to do like that, it is YOUR body and just as much your baby as it is his, so you both get to make a decision on whether to keep the baby, however the pill is 99.9% effective so it is extremely unlikely you will fall pregnant whilst using contraception.

TBH what he is saying doesn't bode well for a long-term relationship if he is this controlling.
(edited 12 years ago)
There is no way that we'll be able to influence your decision, or prevent him from getting angry. The pill isn't 100% certain to stop pregnancy, just explain that.
If you got pregnant. It's partly or hugely his fault cos he got the sperm. :P

So he cannot blame you. And he cant even be angry at you.

If he is going to shout and blame anything at you when you got pregnant.

Then he should never be a father of your kid.
Reply 5
Original post by NeonSkies
He sounds like a prat. It takes two to tango, it's just as much his fault as yours if you do get pregnant.


Yeah but I'm on the pill so if anything went wrong he'd blame me for not taking it properly.
I can totally see where your boyfriend is coming from. No young guy wants to be burdened with a baby. If I were him and you got pregnant, and outright refused to abort it, I would dump you.
(edited 12 years ago)
Well obviously if you're taking precautions you aren't going to get pregnant. And clearly he doesn't want a child.
But why are you with someone who scares you?
How often does he get angry at you? Are you actually scared of him? Do you sometimes feel like you're walking on egg shells over really silly things?

I felt like that with my last boyfriend, and I honestly think I was stuck in quite an awful relationship, because he scared the hell out of me. I would try and evaluate your relationship, and whether its just over getting pregnant or over a lot of things.
Reply 9
Original post by sil3nt_cha0s
He doesn't want a baby. Get that into your head.


i know? And I don't want one either, but accidents happen and my point is I'm terrified what he would do if that ever did happen.
Original post by Anonymous
i know? And I don't want one either, but accidents happen and my point is I'm terrified what he would do if that ever did happen.

ok I edited my post so please read it again.
Original post by Anonymous
Yeah but I'm on the pill so if anything went wrong he'd blame me for not taking it properly.


There is always a slight chance of contraception failing, I'm sure if the hypothetical condom broke during sex he wouldn't have the same opinion. It's his responsibility to make sure you are taking the pill as well, he could remind you or something.
Reply 12
The idea of having a baby with a girl you don't see yourself spending the rest of your life with is terrifying.for every guy.
Reply 13
Original post by linkdapink
How often does he get angry at you? Are you actually scared of him? Do you sometimes feel like you're walking on egg shells over really silly things?

I felt like that with my last boyfriend, and I honestly think I was stuck in quite an awful relationship, because he scared the hell out of me. I would try and evaluate your relationship, and whether its just over getting pregnant or over a lot of things.


Yeah it does feel like egg shells sometimes....he gets angry a lot about stupid things. Such as if I go on his computer without asking, if I drop a crumb on the bed, if I won't give him money for something......to name a few.
If you're scared of your boyfriend, something tells me you shouldn't be with him, let alone getting yourself into situations where you could potentially become pregnant by him.
Him scaring yo doesn't sound good for a long-term relationship. But if he's that worried, he should use a condom. Not 'your fault' then, his fault as well.
Original post by Anonymous
Telling him and his reaction....I'm on the pill so hopefully it will never happen, but he can get very angry. He doesn't get violent he just shouts. He would blame me. He told me "If you get pregnant, you WILL get rid of it." We were talking and I realized that the main reason I would be scared is cause of him. My parents would support me whatever and so would everyone else.

This is a non-issue I guess as I'm on the pill, but I'm always thinking "I have to take it at the same time everyday because of what he would do if anything ever want wrong". Is that bad for me to think that?


Get out of that relationship. As soon as possible.

Fear is a terrible reason to love anyone. For your own good, get the hell outta there.

Do not become another statistic for domestic abuse.
Reply 17
Its understandable for a guy to get nervous about getting a girl pregnant but its one thing to encourage her to take the pill, another to SCARE her into taking it.

Tbh i would get rid and find someone who's more supportive
Having sex, I'm afraid, ranks you as a grown-up, and part of that is deciding when NOT to have sex. In a relationship, if sex is involved, there really needs to be a discussion of "Hey, you know, no contraception is 100% effective, these are my views on what I might do in the event of that, if you're not okay with that we need to not have sex." And if you think that conversation's scary NOW, it will be MUCH SCARIER to face on Day X of a missing period.

Which means if you can't have it, you need to leave. Seriously. That's not a healthy long term relationship.
If he is actually that bad, I wouldn't wanna be with him at all (if I were a girl)

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