I can't seem to escape from my past

just to outline the situation:

20 years old, male, virgin, never kissed a girl, badly bullied in sixth form (where far too many rumours about me spread around too), sort of bullied or picked on at most stages in my life.

went to university but several school friends went to university too. school friends eventually started to talk to my university friends (you know, through parties and at clubs and societies, people like to talk and bitch about other people's lives).

my university friends know i was badly bullied in sixth form, they are almost certain i am a virgin, they suspect i havent kissed, whenever i try and have a good time, one of them puts me down about being a virgin and being bullied etc. and the rest dont stop him.

they barely want to go clubbing because they think all i want to do is pull from a club, even though they know i have never tried it on with a girl in a club because i am too scared to.

i am pretty sure the guys bitch about me to every girl i meet about my past life which ruins any chance of even a friendship with a girl.

what am i supposed to do?

Reply 1

Dekota-XS

Refrain from posting threads every 20 minute intervals.

Reply 2

Dr Pressure

Original post by Dekota-XS

Refrain from posting threads every 20 minute intervals.

sorry. i dont come on this site often and when i do, i think of a few things all at once then post them. i promise this is my last thread for today.

so anyone?

Original post by Dr Pressure

Stand up for yourself that's what. Start laughing it off, or tearing down people who start stuff with you.

Get some confidence. The only reason the bullying is effecting you now is because you are letting it. That's not saying bullying is fine but you got to realise that for the most part the responsibility to deal with it is with you.

Fact of the matter is there are always *******s in the world and the only way you get anywhere with them is by showing them it isn't bothering you or pulling them down.

A 'friend' is telling some girl about you? Just laugh and remind your friend in front of the girl the time he did something stupid.

If you are so worried about virginity/not having kissed a girl then actually try to talk to them in clubs or whatever.

I dunno but yeah...sort it out.

Get new friends.

Move on. New town, new job, new friends.

LOL snap

Reply 7

noobynoo

well if it's all just rumours then just laugh it off. there are people worse off than you at university who've lost legs and eyes and so forth.

Reply 8

Of_the_hook

Original post by Dr Pressure

my university friends know i was badly bullied in sixth form, they are almost certain i am a virgin, they suspect i havent kissed, whenever i try and have a good time, one of them puts me down about being a virgin and being bullied etc. and the rest dont stop him.

Stand up for yourself. You can't rely on others to stop someone picking on you.

they barely want to go clubbing because they think all i want to do is pull from a club, even though they know i have never tried it on with a girl in a club because i am too scared to.

Didn't you say in your other thread you only wanted friends to get girls? :confused:

I can see why some of the guys might not want to be friends with you.....

Reply 9

Dr Pressure

Original post by Jez RR

Move on. New town, new job, new friends.

LOL snap

great advice. did you even read what i wrote? i am at university.

Reply 10

Entangled

Doctor Pressure (bum bum bum budda-bum-bum, bum bum bum budda-bum-bum, *plink plink*)

Reply 11

j.emilylala

Why would a girl not want to be your friend just because she found out you used to get bullied, and that you're a virgin? :s-smilie:

If this is whats happening, then these girls are definitely not worth your time!

When the 'right girl' appears she shouldn't run a mile because of your past, everyone has a past...

Reply 12

Rzc

Original post by Studentus-anonymous

You won't get a more honest or down to earth answer like this one.

Seriously, stand up for yourself or take it as banter. Me and my friends are always picking on one another but we don't mind because we are friends at the end of the day; where as if someone else did it I'd probably knock them out.

If you don't/can't trust your friends I suggest you get new ones. Relationships are built around trust. If they keep spreading **** then seriously stand up for yourself and do something about it!

Good luck :colone:

Reply 13

Khaysha-Saine

Original post by Dr Pressure

what am i supposed to do?

it’s a shame your sixth form friends went to the same uni but there’s so many people at uni I’m sure you can still find good friends!
You were bullied but you need to not stand up for it anymore and simple let them know yo wont stand for it. Bullies can only pick on people weaker then themselves as soon as you show them your not the person you were before they will stop. Also look at yourself, what traits are your best and which are your worst what could you change to make yourself more likeable… I don’t believe anybody should change for other people but there’s always something we could improve about ourselves.
As for being around girls you need to just try talking to them more, even if you don’t like them in that way just start having conversation wit more and more girls and then you wont be as nervous around them ?

Reply 14

Jez RR

Original post by Dr Pressure

great advice. did you even read what i wrote? i am at university.

I'll be nice. You'll find that the advice still stands, however limited you think your options are.

When you put:

went to university but several school friends went to university too.

... because you left it past tense, it's ambiguous as to whether you are still there.

Now if you cannot move on physically, at least ask yourself why you are friends with a bunch of people who bully you. Why haven't you moved on? Have you become so dependent on their opinion of you that you have come to expect such treatment?