Missed out on "teenage life"

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I chose to miss out on 'teenage life' for several reasons. Firstly, I am morally against the idea of binge drinking and 'one-night stands'. Secondly, I would rather devote my youth to study so that I may comfortably enjoy my adulthood without looking back on my teenage years and thinking, 'man... I could have done so much to change where I am today and what I can do'.

Reply 121

Nick Longjohnson

I was in the same boat.

Now I'm living it up like Charlie Sheen, without the drugs, only the booze.

Life is what you make it. I ain't settling down until I'm 30.

Reply 122

OBAG09L

Original post by Silver Arrow

I've pretty much finished my first year in uni and i've not done anything. Virtually everyone has met a girl or had sex or sth like that. I met this really fir gir but we're "just friends" I kissed a girl once on a dancefloor. It was my first proper kiss since i was about 9 or 10 and MAN it was AMAZING. It just tasted so goood.
Ah well...

I've been really drunk though loads of times and ended up in hospital. i've also thrown up and groped a few bums on the dancefloor but that's it

Scarily similar first year to mine too.

Reply 123

Refrigerator

teenage life isn't like in the movies
most teenagers are probably like you, it's just that their stories aren't good enough for you to have heard of them

Reply 124

VeniViciVidi

Original post by im so academic

So? Who ever said it was a necessity?

Bless

Reply 125

hatemylife

Original post by Dr Pressure

i am pretty certain that im so academic is not a 14 year old girl.

anywho, i am 20 and i feel like i missed out on teenage life a lot. the drinking, the sex (still a virgin), the parties.

but i have been bullied at almost every stage of my life and never been allowed to get accustomed to normal teenage life without being bullied. its only at university did i start to properly drink and party and even then i havent partied or gone clubbing very much. my past bullying haunts me and doesnt make me trust people.

Same

Reply 126

Eccle1993

Never thought I'd agree with im so academic, but I totally do :smile:

Just do what makes you happy and don't worry about what you're supposed to be doing. My experiences are pretty similar, but in the past six months or so I've been more 'normal' and to be honest it's not THAT great...I think a lot of the time people look like they're having a lot more fun than they actually are. So yeahh . . do what suits you. :biggrin:

Reply 127

boysenberry

I know what you mean, OP. I missed out on a lot of the socialising during school because of my oppressively sheltering parents (muslim and pakistani is a pretty crap combination when it comes to things like this), and definitely felt always outside my circle of friends just due to not being able to share in a lot of the things they did socially. Can't say I'll look back at my teenage years too fondly. They were just pretty, pretty stale.
But I'm moved away for uni now and having a lot more fun. Doing the 'normal' thing is a good laugh and pretty worthwhile. Also, having the chance to be a bit more spontaneous with things is great. Don't dwell on what your time during school was like. Just relax and have fun now!

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 128

Anonymous #7

Sounds like me I've recently turned 19 never been out drinking (only time I got drunk was when I was 11 at a NYE party when I thought alcohol was cool so we snuck a load of larger) don't go to parties never been 'involved' with a girl.

I had friends at school but never met up with them out of school when I was younger we moved quite a bit (due to dad's work) so I never really felt like I fitted in the best years of my life, socially, were when I was 10-12 for these two years I had a proper best friend we regularly went round each others houses etc. Then we moved here and as I say I never felt like I fit in. I have been teased in the past this never directly effected me but I guess it made me less trusting of people so although I did have friends from 12+ I generally kept myself to myself.

Some people may think this is a bit sad but tbh I've enjoyed myself at every stage of my life I generally prefer my own company anyway I'm kind of a lone wolf tbf.

Right now though I'm not a uni or doing anything useful generally I'm wasting my days because I am shy, and don't know what I want to do with my life. But still I'm enjoying myself though not sure how long it can continue til my parents really make me start doing something useful.

As far as future relationships go I've given up on the idea of marriage and children (not sure when I was ever thinking about it in fairness I guess it stems from what is expected when you're a child) it just seems more hassle then its worth imo I want to get as much clunge as I can but settling down with a wife and kids is not for me as I said earlier I'm kinda a lone wolf (maybe I'll feel differently in a few years) and as far as kids go, I love kids they remind me of when I was so carefree but I don't want any of my own too much hassle tbh I'd rather be the fun uncle that gets to have fun with the kids but not worry about raising them (and I can disown them when they become unruly teenagers :wink:

)

Anyway moral of the story just enjoy yourself screw whatever anyone else thinks tbh.

Reply 129

Young Spade

Original post by righteous

Wouldn't you agree though that such a stage of exposure and experimentation is necessary or at least beneficial for proper development though? I'm not sure whether this is the case or not by the way, just interested in your opinion.

How do people become successful socially without practise in social situations? Arguably the social situations encountered as teenagers have little connection with the adult world, but there is still a great degree of social interaction involved.

For the most part, I do agree with you on the idea that we as teenagers need this social interaction to some degree to learn how to function in the real world. For the small select few who tend to be entirely alone or spend all of their time in their rooms, I have noticed that their social skills are not up to par, as you are saying.

Of course it varies from person to person and you can't just assume; personally I spend 90% of my time alone here at college but the way I was brought up (everyone in my family teaches, dad is a professor at various universities) I was taught at a young age how to conduct myself in relation to different types of people in different situations.

But yea I agree with you overall, it is beneficial to get out and learn how to interact with different people, although I think the TYPE of people and the places you meet them plays a large part in it, arguably the most important.

Reply 130

Young Spade

Original post by Refrigerator

teenage life isn't like in the movies
most teenagers are probably like you, it's just that their stories aren't good enough for you to have heard of them

I agree. I'm 19 and from my experiences with a lot of different types of people, a large majority have this misconception of what other's life really is.

For example, I currently attend FAMU, which is a great school outright and I enjoy being here. However FSU is litterally 6 blocks away, if you so choose you can transfer back and forth between universities (a couple of classes or so) every semester.

FSU has more money overall, a larger student population, and a lot of people would argue that it is a "better" school. I have friends that go to different colleges all over the state (Florida) and I have also gone to each and every one of them.

Education wise, they are all equal. However people tend to think that because school A has more students or a bigger campus, it's better. Those thoughts correlate with the overall IQ of the students there along with the quality of their possible future. The funny thing is is that these people make those assumptions but when I ask if they have even gone to FSU (30 minute walk from our university) they say they haven't, or they have just driven by.

It's quite sad if you ask me.

Reply 131

Cesar Lecat

Original post by boysenberry

Such as

Reply 132

Anonymous #8

Original post by Anonymous

Hey,

I'm 19 years old male, in my first year at uni and have found a girl who stuff is starting to happen with. :smile:

But when I look back over my teenage years I feel like I've missed out on a lot... I've never been in a relationship or even kissed, never really went to parties / got drunk and didn't have a solid group of friends (more just good friends with individuals). Its not that I haven't enjoyed the past 5 or so years of my life - I really have - its just that I feel that I may have missed out on some stuff :frown:

I don't really know what I'm hoping to get by posting on here, I just wanted to put it out there!

You describe my teenage years as well.

Although I got along well with people in my class, I was never really invited to any parties and I didn't make any effort to socialize either. For the 4-5 years or so that I attended the school I went to before university, I almost never did anything social with my classmates and had no friends whatsoever outside of school. When they met up and went to parties/dates with girls on the weekend, I was always at home. During the summer I always worked while they partied.
I don't regret anything I did do during those years: that was all well and good and I enjoyed it. Its just the thought that I could have done more with my life.

I now feel that the lack of experience, both general socializing and more specifically with girls, has left me a relative social retard. I do well in a work/academic environment but socially I am completely lost and even now in my final year of university, I have yet to kiss a girl or go on a date. I have never been drunk in my life and never really partied.

Reply 133

samconly

Original post by im so academic

I'd rather not have the teenage experience then.

omg typical of iamsoacademic

Reply 134

Marinated_in_Joy

Original post by im so academic

I'd rather not have the teenage experience then.

I think we might have found the root of the problems that caused SO many of your posts on TSR.

Reply 135

im so academic

Original post by Marinated_in_Joy

I think we might have found the root of the problems that caused SO many of your posts on TSR.

Excuse me?

Reply 136

BambieWambie

Original post by im so academic

Excuse me?

*cough* parasite *cough*

Reply 137

Marinated_in_Joy

Original post by im so academic

Excuse me?

How's SATs going?

Reply 138

revival222

Original post by Jake22

It really doesn't matter. Just forget about that and start enjoying it now. I didn't really have any decent form of social life (and definately no involvement with girls) until I was nearly 17 (all boys schools are a bad thing). When I lost my virginity, it was only about the second or third girl I had properly kissed.

In short, maybe it is all starting a little bit late but who gives a ****? Just enjoy it and carry on.