The Student Room Group

Would you add a staff member on facebook?

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Reply 20
Do you speak to him regularly on facebook? Because sometimes people just add eachother on facebook to just be nosy. He might have just thought that and deleted you for that reason. I quite often have a deleting session of people who just added me to have a nosy. I don't want people on my facebook who never talk and just stalk. It's pointless, but its not that I dislike them or anything.

I seriously wouldn't get too upset about it, if you ever need anything you could just message him though :biggrin:
Original post by Anonymous
It's because it it quite a slap in the face when someone who you think is a friend rejects you, I will never quite understand why people do this.


Original post by francescafrancesca
It's just facebook, the lowest level of 'friendship'. Many people have people on facebook who they maybe met once in their life. So if someone who you cared about deletes you off there it's a slap in the face. Wouldn't you be concerned if someone you thought was a close friend deleted you? :confused:

I know there are many reasons why the person deleted them, but I find it unfair to dismiss the OP's feeling because its 'just facebook'


I disagree. It is a virtual connection, completely invisible. The OP has no reason to feel entitled to a facebook add. In particular, I have deleted many people, and refuse to accept people on facebook who I don't have a regular physical connection to. If someone doesn't have the emotional maturity to get over it, they should probably leave the adult world and go back to sucking on their thumb in a nursery.
Why are you putting emphasis and placing some special connection in the fact your both of the same nationality? Who cares?

And it is only facebook!
I try to warn everyone
Reply 24
Original post by jumpingjesusholycow
I disagree. It is a virtual connection, completely invisible. The OP has no reason to feel entitled to a facebook add. In particular, I have deleted many people, and refuse to accept people on facebook who I don't have a regular physical connection to. If someone doesn't have the emotional maturity to get over it, they should probably leave the adult world and go back to sucking on their thumb in a nursery.


If it's "Only a virtual connection" why are you taking it so seriously by rejecting people and deleting people? It's obvious that you too are putting thought into it, when in reality if you just saw it as a bit of a joke you wouldn't really care if you had some people on there who didn't really speak to you in real life. :confused:In fact I find people who take facebook privacy that seriously the ones who have low emotional maturity.
Reply 25
Ehh, I got deleted by a friend who I've known for about 13 years. I can't say I'm bothered tbh. If she can't be bothered to make the effort over the internet, why should I waste my time sulking about being deleted? Move on.
Original post by Anonymous

Original post by Anonymous
If it's "Only a virtual connection" why are you taking it so seriously by rejecting people and deleting people? It's obvious that you too are putting thought into it, when in reality if you just saw it as a bit of a joke you wouldn't really care if you had some people on there who didn't really speak to you in real life. :confused:In fact I find people who take facebook privacy that seriously the ones who have low emotional maturity.


Well as I seek a career in Politics, I actually think private security is quite important. Whether or not I'll actually make it is one thing, but in reality; I can't afford to be frivolous when it comes to my digital footprint, and as one, I actually think my career is a bit of a priority. Would you also say that young teenage girls who take care with their digital privacy are also 'emotionally immature'?

Honestly, your sense of self entitlement is so out of whack, I can see why someone would want to detach from you. You seem to think it's a cardinal sin to delete someone from an online profile without issuing a formal notice or a fanfare to their door. I also don't see why in order to not view facebook relationships as a priority, you have to view facebook as a 'bit of a joke'. The fact of the matter is; he deleted you. What are you going to do about it? Complain to the elders of facebook? If you are an adult, I suggest you get over your neurosis, and learn to deal with it. I have no idea how people like you cope in the real world.
Original post by jumpingjesusholycow
I disagree. It is a virtual connection, completely invisible. The OP has no reason to feel entitled to a facebook add. In particular, I have deleted many people, and refuse to accept people on facebook who I don't have a regular physical connection to. If someone doesn't have the emotional maturity to get over it, they should probably leave the adult world and go back to sucking on their thumb in a nursery.


Just because it is invisible that doesn't mean it doesn't represent something. If you delete someone off facebook it means "I don't want you to be able to contact me on here" or "I don't trust you enough to show you my personal information" for whatever reason. Imagine if your close friend suddenly blocked you from facebook, skype and blocked your phone number. Are you telling me you wouldn't care because all of these connection are completely invisible?
Reply 28
People delete me all the time...at first I think "Oh, you ****ing whorebag"
Now I'm just like "meh".
I think Facebook should go away now. People get so paranoid whenever someone deletes them or doesn't accept their friend request or whatever. Light use, fair enough, but obsessing is a little OTT.

OP I wouldn't worry about it, I'm sure if you spoke to him in real life he would be happy to talk to you, he might just not have thought it appropriate to add ex-work colleagues as friends.
Reply 30
Original post by jumpingjesusholycow
Well as I seek a career in Politics, I actually think private security is quite important. Whether or not I'll actually make it is one thing, but in reality; I can't afford to be frivolous when it comes to my digital footprint, and as one, I actually think my career is a bit of a priority. Would you also say that young teenage girls who take care with their digital privacy are also 'emotionally immature'?

Honestly, your sense of self entitlement is so out of whack, I can see why someone would want to detach from you. You seem to think it's a cardinal sin to delete someone from an online profile without issuing a formal notice or a fanfare to their door. I also don't see why in order to not view facebook relationships as a priority, you have to view facebook as a 'bit of a joke'. The fact of the matter is; he deleted you. What are you going to do about it? Complain to the elders of facebook? If you are an adult, I suggest you get over your neurosis, and learn to deal with it. I have no idea how people like you cope in the real world.


So you wouldn't take it personally if a close friend removed you from their facebook profile (not by mistake or for no valid reason)? I struggle to believe you would accept it, speak to them as normal in real life.
Original post by Anonymous

For some reason, you both seem to be posting very similar things (I imagine you're both the same person, ahem) so I'm going to address you both.

Original post by Anonymous
So you wouldn't take it personally if a close friend removed you from their facebook profile (not by mistake or for no valid reason)? I struggle to believe you would accept it, speak to them as normal in real life.


Absolutely. I have no reason to take it personally. If they have a desire to remove me from their profile, that is their choice. If I notice a difference in their behavior face to face, I will react accordingly, but otherwise, what exactly am I missing out on? A few pictures and a facebook wall? Seems pretty pitiful if you're going to get that upset about it.

Original post by francescafrancesca
Just because it is invisible that doesn't mean it doesn't represent something. If you delete someone off facebook it means "I don't want you to be able to contact me on here" or "I don't trust you enough to show you my personal information" for whatever reason. Imagine if your close friend suddenly blocked you from facebook, skype and blocked your phone number. Are you telling me you wouldn't care because all of these connection are completely invisible?


See what you're doing is not making a difference between intentions to do with a real life connection, and one's control over a virtual connection. Firstly, you have absolutely no idea 'what it means' until you ask them. Until then, you are making asinine assumptions that sum up your emotional maturity. Secondly, you're now going further than what was implied. The OP mentioned being added and then deleted on facebook alone, not a complete freeze out, and being blocked from skype and even going so far as to block calls. So you're bringing different things up. Even then however, if that's what a close friend chooses to do, it's their life. They are free to not be my friend if they so wish.

I can only imagine that you are either:

a) a child, who clearly hasn't formed their own personal and independent life, and is therefore dependent on friends to affirm one's identity and so uses facebook as a lifeline.

or

b) a completely friendless adult, who relies on facebook in order to reaffirm connections they know are waning at best.

My advice to you, would be to grow up a little.
Original post by jumpingjesusholycow
For some reason, you both seem to be posting very similar things (I imagine you're both the same person, ahem) so I'm going to address you both.



Absolutely. I have no reason to take it personally. If they have a desire to remove me from their profile, that is their choice. If I notice a difference in their behavior face to face, I will react accordingly, but otherwise, what exactly am I missing out on? A few pictures and a facebook wall? Seems pretty pitiful if you're going to get that upset about it.



See what you're doing is not making a difference between intentions to do with a real life connection, and one's control over a virtual connection. Firstly, you have absolutely no idea 'what it means' until you ask them. Until then, you are making asinine assumptions that sum up your emotional maturity. Secondly, you're now going further than what was implied. The OP mentioned being added and then deleted on facebook alone, not a complete freeze out, and being blocked from skype and even going so far as to block calls. So you're bringing different things up. Even then however, if that's what a close friend chooses to do, it's their life. They are free to not be my friend if they so wish.

I can only imagine that you are either:

a) a child, who clearly hasn't formed their own personal and independent life, and is therefore dependent on friends to affirm one's identity and so uses facebook as a lifeline.

or

b) a completely friendless adult, who relies on facebook in order to reaffirm connections they know are waning at best.

My advice to you, would be to grow up a little.


All of three of your assumptions are incorrect. I have no idea who Anonymous is, we probably have the same opinion because it makes sense. And seeing that you have resulted to personal insults over a discussion it seems that you should follow your own advice of growing up.

In response to your actual argument: If a friend deleted you off facebook for any reason other than they don't want you to contact them, they would probably tell you beforehand (if they had any social skills they'd realize it may offend you). So if they delete you they're basically saying they don't really care about you. And yes obviously "if that's what they choose to do it's their life" - doesn't mean their choices don't hurt you.

edit: you won't get far as a politician if you resort to personally insulting anyone who disagrees with your opinions.
(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 33
I swear facebook is more trouble than it's worth! :/
Original post by francescafrancesca

Original post by francescafrancesca
All of three of your assumptions are incorrect. I have no idea who Anonymous is, we probably have the same opinion because it makes sense. And seeing that you have resulted to personal insults over a discussion it seems that you should follow your own advice of growing up.

In response to your actual argument: If a friend deleted you off facebook for any reason other than they don't want you to contact them, they would probably tell you beforehand (if they had any social skills they'd realize it may offend you). So if they delete you they're basically saying they don't really care about you. And yes obviously "if that's what they choose to do it's their life" - doesn't mean their choices don't hurt you.

edit: you won't get far as a politician if you resort to personally insulting anyone who disagrees with your opinions.


People choose to be insulted. I made reasonable assumptions based on the nature of your arguments, which I then posed to you. If you feel offended, that's either because they're true, or once again, you have low emotional security, once again backing up my argument. Anyhow, once again, you have completely failed to grasp the point. If they delete you, it can be for any reason, but adults settle disputes reasonable and in a civil manner, if there is a conditional reason for them to end a friendship, they will make it known, but otherwise, the fact that they've closed off a few pictures is no big deal. At least, it isn't in the real world.
Its only facebook, who cares?
Original post by DiZZeeKiD
That did make me lol when Rio Ferdinand was quoted to have said troops should be paid footballers wages. Yes, Rio but I can't help thinking that paying 100,000 something troops on £100,000 a week is not economically viable. Now go back to being a footballer :holmes:


This made me lol much as I love Rio.
Original post by jumpingjesusholycow
People choose to be insulted. I made reasonable assumptions based on the nature of your arguments, which I then posed to you. If you feel offended, that's either because they're true, or once again, you have low emotional security, once again backing up my argument. Anyhow, once again, you have completely failed to grasp the point. If they delete you, it can be for any reason, but adults settle disputes reasonable and in a civil manner, if there is a conditional reason for them to end a friendship, they will make it known, but otherwise, the fact that they've closed off a few pictures is no big deal. At least, it isn't in the real world.


Great logic. An insult is something said to intentionally offend someone. Doesn't matter if I'm actually offended. I don't know you and couldn't care less what you think of me.

"If there is a conditional reason for them to end a friendship, they will make it known," - well seeing as you're just repeating what I said in my post there's no argument here.
Original post by francescafrancesca

Original post by francescafrancesca
Great logic. An insult is something said to intentionally offend someone. Doesn't matter if I'm actually offended. I don't know you and couldn't care less what you think of me.

"If there is a conditional reason for them to end a friendship, they will make it known," - well seeing as you're just repeating what I said in my post there's no argument here.


And I'm saying that their deleting you isn't a form of letting you know that 'it's an end to a friendship'. I find that a particularly spurious notion.

And in that case, what I said wasn't for the purprose of offending you, it was a statement made on the back of what I had gathered about you from your rather insidious argument. I have no interest in 'offending you' for the sake of 'offending you', believe me, I have better things to do with my time.
Original post by jumpingjesusholycow
And I'm saying that their deleting you isn't a form of letting you know that 'it's an end to a friendship'. I find that a particularly spurious notion.

And in that case, what I said wasn't for the purprose of offending you, it was a statement made on the back of what I had gathered about you from your rather insidious argument. I have no interest in 'offending you' for the sake of 'offending you', believe me, I have better things to do with my time.


What was the purpose in saying it then? It certainly didn't add anything to your argument.

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