The Student Room Group

RIP messages on Facebook

What do people think of writing messages on the Facebook walls of people who have died? Tacky or just showing respect? By this I mean people who KNEW the person who died, but weren't CLOSE exactly, or maybe hadn't seen them in a couple of years. Was just wondering people's opinions.

anon cos directly inspired by the death of someone I know and I don't want to be disrespectful

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Cringe.
I don't understand. Why would showing respect be tacky?
Reply 3
I don't completely agree with it, theres better ways to show final respects to a person than on a social networking site, plus there's no privacy involved.
I don't like it personally. I'd rather there be some way to delete someone's fb when they die.
Reply 5
I have nothing against it. Deaths are always saddening, even if you weren't necessarily close to the person. Even if you weren't close, you'd want to show respect but honestly, you don't have much choice if you're not close to the person. So I have nothing negative or against people showing their respect to those who have recently passed on on their Facebook page.
I think it's fine, it's like putting flowers on their grave but much more accessible to everyone
Reply 7
I wrote a rest in peace message on someone's page before, I hadn't seen them in about 5 years, but we'd spoken on Facebook. It was really shocking, and I just wanted to say goodbye. I don't think it's tacky.
Well if it's your way of dealing with it, I don't see why it should be a problem?
Reply 9
Original post by Anonymous
What do people think of writing messages on the Facebook walls of people who have died? Tacky or just showing respect? By this I mean people who KNEW the person who died, but weren't CLOSE exactly, or maybe hadn't seen them in a couple of years. Was just wondering people's opinions.

anon cos directly inspired by the death of someone I know and I don't want to be disrespectful


Respectful IMO, if someone you knew died you'd show your respect to them. They may not be able to go to the funeral for whatever reasons and Facebook is the modern trend so.
I think it's odd, generic and a bit cheap when you didn't actually know the person. Laying flowers is better. They mean well though, so if you want to leave a message, do it anyway
If I want to honour the memory of someone I knew, I will spend a moment of my time thinking about them, and the times I enjoyed with them.

Not leave a facebook wallpost.
I once saw a person who felt it appropriate to show his respect via a FarmVille gift, it didn't go down too well.
Reply 13
I'm a bit on the fence. People can do what they like with facebook but I do agree its a little odd.

I remember though when my Uncle posted this big long status asking his friends and family for their 'prayers' and blurting out all this stuff about my Dad (his brother) when he was in a coma. It really really pissed me off because my Dad wouldn't have wanted it, first of all he's an atheist and second of all he doesn't like facebook because he doesn't want personal things being splashed about on the internet. I was so fuming at my Uncle, I could have punched him in the face.
There's certain cases were it's respectful, certain cases where there is other more respectful ways.
Reply 15
My step sisters husband died and because they lived in America away from most of their friends many people left messages on his facebook as their final words to him and I know its a comfort to her now to look at them to remind her she still has people around her who care, also she leaves messages on there to him sometimes just to let her emotions out, so i think its a good thing :smile:
Original post by Dream Weaver
I don't like it personally. I'd rather there be some way to delete someone's fb when they die.


There is, the next of kin can contact FB and notify them (with proof), the user will then be deleted.
Original post by jumpingjesusholycow
If I want to honour the memory of someone I knew, I will spend a moment of my time thinking about them, and the times I enjoyed with them.

Not leave a facebook wallpost.


I don't see why you can't do both? You can think of them and all, but if you believe in putting flowers on graves etc. then you can post on their wall too.
Reply 18
I dont like Facebook RIP pages, I think it's a bit tacky.
We did it when a lass at school died at 15 in a nasty car crash - about 1500 people liked a "band" page for her, and another 500 odd left her messages and stuff.. It was quite nice to be honest.. The school put up 3 massive sheets of white paper as well, in the hallway, which everyone signed etc. Lots of people did the whole flowers/funeral thing too though x

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