What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

Actually embrace being gay.

You should do that anyway

Nooooo, couldn't possibly lol

Why? :/

Well family for one. Not very gay friendly despite the pretense of being liberal. We are all Roman Catholics. Personally, I'm torn in two about being Catholic and being gay. Then I don't want it to define me and don't want people I work with/come into contact with always having it at the back of their mind when thinking about me. Also, I'm a bit too ugly to really have a chance of a relationship, and so there's no point in risking the above for nothing. It's a shame really because I'd have liked to have a romantic life, but I think my duties are more important. I don't want my parents to be known amongst their friends as "the ones with the gay son", so for their sake, and siblings, I couldn't do it.

That's so unfair! I hate the way people gossip, but you know my brother and sister are well a bit messed up to be honest, my parents stopped paying attention to what people were saying. So really, I can tell you care a lot about them, surely they owe you the same? Maybe your parents will react differently once confronted with the situation? At the end of the day you are still their child.

And I don't think you're ugly, you just don't have a lot of self confidence. My grandmother used to say there are no ugly faces just ugly insides (rough translation). You could have a romantic life

And the Catholicism part, that's your choice, but honestly I don't think God would completely hate you and being gay would damn you to hell.

But hey if you want to come out, that is your choice, and just remember those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

The only part of that to which I can respond is the parent's reaction bit: I only had girl friends in school who were proper friends and she remarked on this once and when I came up with some reason as to why it was, she remarked, "Oh thank goodness, I did worry for a bit [about me being gay] so I can gauge their reaction.

That's quite sad. :'( I know it sounds beyond cliche but they are your parents and they should love you anyway! At the end of the day, if you make a choice, make sure it's the right one for you, you don't want to be on your deathbed and be thinking "what if..."
Have no regrets! x

That's my greatest worry - you've really hit the nail on the head; but at the same time, I still don't feel comfortable living a way just to please myself. My eldest brother behaves like a complete lunatic/ 5 year old, so the job of being the responsible one has sort of passed to me. I know it sounds like I'm martyring myself, but I do think about the implications on others and I just wouldn't feel comfortable so although it's going to be a bit lonely I think it's the right choice.