Guys: It really isn't that hard

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Most girls?!!!! :lolwut:

I'm not sure, although it sounds very simple: "hey, where are you going, can I invite you for a coffee"? The girl was nice and open-minded but most girls would have told him to gtfo, especially if they have never seen him before!! :date:

They'd just come out of the same lecture, so he wasn't just some random weirdo, and he said hi first and asked what she was up to next in a friendly small talk kind of way. She could probably tell from all that that he wasn't creepy.
And he asked if she wanted to get a coffee, which is a more casual way of getting to know someone than asking her out on a formal date, and doesn't come with the same kind of pressure and expectations. So he did the whole thing very well I think, and I'd probably say yes in that situation. I think a lot of other girls would too!

Reply 41

Jadelyndsey

Original post by Ich Dien

Mildy? Can you understand what I say or not? :lol:

Define "understand" ? I joke :biggrin:

. I understand that you would wish to see the actual scenario of the OP's specific situation before you could actually make a judgement on his level of confidence/modesty and what not.

My head hurts now. Shhh oh complicated one. :biggrin:

Reply 42

Ich Dien

Original post by mobius323

It's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a woman's seperation to increase the population of the next generation...

I'll stop now.

Why? do what you fecking like. Im not gonna burst into tears :lol:

Original post by Jadelyndsey

My head hurts now.

Embrace it, the longer it hurts the more you get used to it :biggrin:

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 43

Lexi99

Original post by Anonymous

But how can you go up to a girl and say "where are you going" withou coming across as a total creep?

Well you'd say hi and introduce yourself first, duh

Reply 44

mobius323

Original post by Ich Dien

Why? do what you fecking like. Im not gonna burst into tears :lol:

It was more because that's all that South Park said. Or at least, all I can remember. Too much Chemistry revision today. :<

Reply 45

Jadelyndsey

Original post by Ich Dien

Why? do what you fecking like. Im not gonna burst into tears :lol:

Embrace it, the longer it hurts the more you get used to it :biggrin:

You're just a headache wrapped up in a mind-fu(k, surrounded by a sea of non-sensical utterances aren't you? Kudos dude :biggrin:

V. inspirational.

Reply 46

Ich Dien

Original post by alijimi

Taking control of the situation means nothing if the girl rejects you :date:

It does, because if you can take control of the situation is means your not afraid to say how you feel.

The difference is in the action, not the outcome. :rolleyes:

If you get rejected, so ****ing what? She doesnt like you anyway (you dont know, you may find a friend regardless) so why does what she thinks matters to you?
Her and her friends laugh at you? well **** her then. Find somebody more deserving..

Original post by Jadelyndsey

You're just a headache wrapped up in a mind-fu(k, surrounded by a sea of non-sensical utterances aren't you? Kudos dude :biggrin:

V. inspirational.

Thank you. Id have it NO other way :lol:

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 47

bognor-regis

Original post by Aesc

I read this and then looked up, quite by coincidence, to see the phrase "adored and respected member" beneath your name :colondollar:

haha. Well I adore and respect myself, so it's valid.

Reply 48

*Hakz*

I am really similar to the OP.

OP, thank you for this. You have just taught me a new approach.

More competition now; watch out OP :wink:

Reply 49

alijimi

Original post by lazyswot

A lot of girls would say that they have no time, or that they have a boyfriend and most of the girls actually have :rolleyes:

. So accepting his invitation for a coffee doesn't mean it will go far, and I'm saying it from a guy's point of view as I know what guys have in mind when they invite a girl for something :cool:

Reply 50

Ich Dien

Original post by alijimi

A lot of girls would say that they have no time, or that they have a boyfriend and most of the girls actually have :rolleyes:

. So accepting his invitation for a coffee doesn't mean it will go far, and I'm saying it from a guy's point of view as I know what guys have in mind when they invite a girl for something :cool:

Evidence?
Im sorry, but that attitude is why you dont find the awesome type of girls hanging around the place.

Not to mention, the OP didnt approach the girl with a sexface on. Levelheaded girls can see the guys with honorable intentions because of the way they put themselves across..

Fatalism will get you **** all.
Taking responsibility its the best thing, trust me and the OP.

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 51

alijimi

Original post by Ich Dien

It does, because if you can take control of the situation is means your not afraid to say how you feel.

The difference is in the action, not the outcome.... :rolleyes:

But the (hopefully positive) outcome is the reason why you are acting, so being confident and showing your feelings is very good, but that is wasted if you get nothing.

"So what"!! you are right. She rejects me, I approach another girl, although this is not fun, at least for me :angry:

Reply 52

lazyswot

Original post by Ich Dien

If I hadn't run out of rep, I would have +repped you. Your post is a refreshing change from a lot of the opinions you read on TSR.

Reply 53

Ich Dien

Original post by alijimi

Dude, your doing this for yourself, not for her. The effort is not wasted because you are a better (you feel better) person for being able to do that, you could do it again rather than going back to sitting on your hands forever.

Im not saying its fun (although it could be), and im no ****ing player, and im not a prize catch ethier. I know where you coming from. Ive lived in the pit I dug for myself for years, But im now realising Its time to 'man the **** up' before the oppertunity im very lucky to have escapes me for good.

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 54

Danz123

Original post by Ich Dien

I dont think you can make that generalisation because Its relative to each situation.
You have to take oppertunities while they are there. Take it regardless or leave it and regret it, not a case of who should be doing what.

That's true, but what I got from the OP implied that guys should be stepping up and asking more, when girls give their 'hints'. I'm not saying that girls don't ever do the approaching, that was just a reply to the OP.

Reply 55

Ich Dien

Original post by Danz123

Thats what I think hes saying to, and thats what I think guys should be doing

Because TBH. If you sit back and wait for the girl you fancy to drop into your lap its Your loss.
You reap what you sow, be it nothing or some clunge.
But its universal to: Girls,Gays can be in exactly the same situation.
If you take gender out of the equation, you are saying exactly the same thing I think.

everyone could do with being a bit braver.

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 56

Danz123