Fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me =(

I don't really know why I'm making a thread about it - I guess I'm just really upset. I've been living with my fiancé and his mum and his brother and sister (when she's not at uni) for over a year now and we're getting married in march.

I'd always though me and his brother got on quite well, but we went out last night (sort of a belated engagement celebration - because it's the first time his sisters been back since we got engaged) and his brother had been in a pretty bad mood all day and his sister asked him why and we were just chatting and having a joke and stuff and then he just started on me saying "piss off piss off piss off, I can't stand you, I actually can't stand you".

I just don't know how he could say something like this - I have never done anything to him and my fiancé had even asked him to be a grooms man at the wedding and he seemed happy and now apparently he can't stand me?

I know he'd been in a bad mood, but it really felt like he meant it. It's just really awkward now, he hasn't apologised, and a lot of the time it's just me and him in the house and now I don't even want to be here.

I just don't know what to do now - it really hurts.

tl;dr: My fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me, and I'm upset because I always thought we got on alright and he was supposed to be an usher at the wedding, now everythings awkward and I don't want to be in a room with him.

I don't really know why I'm making a thread about it - I guess I'm just really upset. I've been living with my fiancé and his mum and his brother and sister (when she's not at uni) for over a year now and we're getting married in march.

I'd always though me and his brother got on quite well, but we went out last night (sort of a belated engagement celebration - because it's the first time his sisters been back since we got engaged) and his brother had been in a pretty bad mood all day and his sister asked him why and we were just chatting and having a joke and stuff and then he just started on me saying "piss off piss off piss off, I can't stand you, I actually can't stand you".

I just don't know how he could say something like this - I have never done anything to him and my fiancé had even asked him to be a grooms man at the wedding and he seemed happy and now apparently he can't stand me?

I know he'd been in a bad mood, but it really felt like he meant it. It's just really awkward now, he hasn't apologised, and a lot of the time it's just me and him in the house and now I don't even want to be here.

I just don't know what to do now - it really hurts.

tl;dr: My fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me, and I'm upset because I always thought we got on alright and he was supposed to be an usher at the wedding, now everythings awkward and I don't want to be in a room with him.

Have you spoken to your fiancé about this?? Perhaps it would be best to tell him, and see what he says about it? Was there any chance that he could have just been joking (even though it's clearly not very funny)

Sorry not to be much help *hugggsss*

'Bad mood' are the key words in the situation People say stuff bad stuff like they mean it when they are in a bad mood.

How old is he just out of interest?

he might have been more drunk than you thought, how did everyone react

I don't really know why I'm making a thread about it - I guess I'm just really upset. I've been living with my fiancé and his mum and his brother and sister (when she's not at uni) for over a year now and we're getting married in march.

I'd always though me and his brother got on quite well, but we went out last night (sort of a belated engagement celebration - because it's the first time his sisters been back since we got engaged) and his brother had been in a pretty bad mood all day and his sister asked him why and we were just chatting and having a joke and stuff and then he just started on me saying "piss off piss off piss off, I can't stand you, I actually can't stand you".

I just don't know how he could say something like this - I have never done anything to him and my fiancé had even asked him to be a grooms man at the wedding and he seemed happy and now apparently he can't stand me?

I know he'd been in a bad mood, but it really felt like he meant it. It's just really awkward now, he hasn't apologised, and a lot of the time it's just me and him in the house and now I don't even want to be here.

I just don't know what to do now - it really hurts.

tl;dr: My fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me, and I'm upset because I always thought we got on alright and he was supposed to be an usher at the wedding, now everythings awkward and I don't want to be in a room with him.

I don't really know why I'm making a thread about it - I guess I'm just really upset. I've been living with my fiancé and his mum and his brother and sister (when she's not at uni) for over a year now and we're getting married in march.

I'd always though me and his brother got on quite well, but we went out last night (sort of a belated engagement celebration - because it's the first time his sisters been back since we got engaged) and his brother had been in a pretty bad mood all day and his sister asked him why and we were just chatting and having a joke and stuff and then he just started on me saying "piss off piss off piss off, I can't stand you, I actually can't stand you".

I just don't know how he could say something like this - I have never done anything to him and my fiancé had even asked him to be a grooms man at the wedding and he seemed happy and now apparently he can't stand me?

I know he'd been in a bad mood, but it really felt like he meant it. It's just really awkward now, he hasn't apologised, and a lot of the time it's just me and him in the house and now I don't even want to be here.

I just don't know what to do now - it really hurts.

tl;dr: My fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me, and I'm upset because I always thought we got on alright and he was supposed to be an usher at the wedding, now everythings awkward and I don't want to be in a room with him.

I guess you will move to your own apartment when you get married, so you won't see him daily. At the end it's your fiancé's opinion that matters, not his brother's

How old is he?

edit: he sounds like he's being really immature (like a 10 year old) - you're marrying his brother not him and if you haven't done anything and he hasn't given a justification for what he said then yes it's awkward but just ignore him, especially if your fiancé has taken your side on this

He'll be 18 in June




He wasn't drunk. People were just silent. There was him, and and my fiancé and then their sister and her boyfriend. Nobody said anything to him, we should sort of went back to our conversation, him not joining in and I put on a brave face for the night.

If he's 17 then I really wouldn't worry about it but I do think your bf should have a word with him, he won't know you put him up to it as your bf heard himself what was said

As someone who had his sister's boyfriend living with them for 6 months, trust me, his brother is sick of the sight of you. In his eyes, you're a guest in the house and while you're there it means that he can't fully relax and be himself.

Harsh but true.

I know that, we're moving out as soon as we can afford it, but we're saving for the wedding as well so money just isn't going very far at the minute.



Yea he's taken my side, he thinks it's disgusting what he said. I haven't done anything to him, I don't know why he said what he said, but I could tell by his face that he meant it.