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Is this sexual abuse?

Hey guys. Sorry if I've put this in the wrong place. Please keep annon. or delete, I know people on here!

Basically when I was 7 years old my brothers friend 'fingered' me and touched me inappropiately, he also kissed me and asked me to touch him 'there'. I didn't really want to but I did it. I sort of knew it was wrong but I wasn't really sure and I never realised what had happened until I was much older.
The problem is he was only 11/12 at the time so I'm unsure as whether it counts as sexual abuse since he was only a child too.

This was left me very conflicted and terribly confused throughout my life and I would love to have gained an somewhat definate answer from this, and then hopefully be able to move on with my life.

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He knew what he was doing, report that SOB.
Reply 2
Original post by hxecute
He knew what he was doing, report that SOB.


It was over 11 years ago so nothing has been done about it and I doubt anything ever will. I don't even think he would be able to be convicted of it since it happened when he was a child?
7 years old? Jesus.
Reply 4
Yes this is sexual abuse..
Reply 5
Original post by Bektas
This is disturbing.

:troll:


I'm not a troll, but thanks for your intelligent imput.

Ps. I accidentally wrote this message without pressing 'anonymously' I'd really appreciate it if you could keep it to yourself? Thank you :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
It was over 11 years ago so nothing has been done about it and I doubt anything ever will. I don't even think he would be able to be convicted of it since it happened when he was a child?


If it's still tormenting you, then you really should report it. It's still affecting you, so it still counts as sexual abuse.
Reply 7
Right guys, I'm a total idiot with the 'make post anonymously' button so if you did manage to see my name then please don't mention it. I know people online and it would create some awkward conversations. Thanks in advance!
Reply 8
The determination of sexual abuse in this scenario is quite straightforward:
If it happened...................... It is sexual abuse. :erm: :yes:
If it didn't................... It's trolling. :colonhash: and in pretty bad taste at that. :slap:


It obviously has an effect on you. You deserve to live your life in peace and whatnot. Report him. Let him get fingered by his cell mate against his will. Let him be bought to justice and open up. Try not to let it bottle up inside and destroy you. Talk about it.
(edited 12 years ago)
Reply 9
yes it is sexual abuse see a therapist if it bothers you so much
Are you a boy or a girl
Reply 11
Original post by oh-bang
Yes this is sexual abuse..


One of my friends mentioned something similar happening to her, but she said that it wasn't abuse because the abuser was so young that it was just him 'experimenting'. That left me confused because I'm unsure whether the same thing can be said for the guy who touched me?

I think as long as I can be sure that it really was abuse then it would easier for me to get over it. Thanks for your reply!
Original post by Gamewizard
Are you a boy or a girl


Does it really matter?
Reply 13
Original post by Carnivores
yes it is sexual abuse see a therapist if it bothers you so much


Thanks. I've seen a therapist actually but that was only for a few months back when I was 13, and I wouldn't say it's affected me too much other than not being able to put a label to the experience. Thanks for the explanation anyways.
Reply 14
Original post by Gamewizard
Are you a boy or a girl


Girl, but I don't see how that matters? :s-smilie:
Reply 15
Original post by Agent Smirnoff
The determination of sexual abuse in this scenario is quite straightforward:
If it happened...................... It is sexual abuse. :erm: :yes:
If it didn't................... It's trolling. :colonhash: and in pretty bad taste at that. :slap:


It obviously has an effect on you. You deserve to live your life in peace and whatnot. Report him. Let him get fingered by his cell mate against his will. Let him be bought to justice and open up. Try not to let it bottle up inside and destroy you. Talk about it.


Ok thank you. Just to be clear I was confused whether it was or not because of his young age. A few friends of mine considered it just 'experimenting' because of how young he was, and truthfully myself I've often doubted whether he really knew what he was doing or not. If he did know what he was doing then I'm confused about whether he knew the full extent of it or whether he just did it and didn't bother to think about the consequences. Either way I'm still confused.

I'm not sure reporting him would do much good. It happened a long time ago and as well as that it's just my word against his, he could easily say it never happened. I did have diary entires which described what happened years later but I destoryed them so I don't think anything can happen. Thanks for the advice.
Honestly?? This is actually really common!

I know a guy whose sister slept with him when he was about 12 and her 17. She did it to ''see what it was like''.

My best friend and her cousin brother did anal when she was about 5 or 6. Her cousin brother was 12. No joke.

My cousin brother tried to show me what "love game" (sex) was 10 years ago when I was 6 and him 5. He said his friend showed him at school. I stopped it as soon as I realised wtf he was doing.

My cousin sister tried doing it with me when I was about 8 years old. I knew what she was doing and didn't let it happen. She was about 12/13 at the time.

There's a hell of a lot more but these are the few I can only think of now.

Please keep anon or delete!
Original post by Anonymous
Honestly?? This is actually really common!

I know a guy whose sister slept with him when he was about 12 and her 17. She did it to ''see what it was like''.

My best friend and her cousin brother did anal when she was about 5 or 6. Her cousin brother was 12. No joke.

My cousin brother tried to show me what "love game" (sex) was 10 years ago when I was 6 and him 5. He said his friend showed him at school. I stopped it as soon as I realised wtf he was doing.

My cousin sister tried doing it with me when I was about 8 years old. I knew what she was doing and didn't let it happen. She was about 12/13 at the time.

There's a hell of a lot more but these are the few I can only think of now.

Please keep anon or delete!


It's not common.. you just have a ****ing strange family.
Reply 18
Original post by Anonymous
Honestly?? This is actually really common!

I know a guy whose sister slept with him when he was about 12 and her 17. She did it to ''see what it was like''.

My best friend and her cousin brother did anal when she was about 5 or 6. Her cousin brother was 12. No joke.

My cousin brother tried to show me what "love game" (sex) was 10 years ago when I was 6 and him 5. He said his friend showed him at school. I stopped it as soon as I realised wtf he was doing.

My cousin sister tried doing it with me when I was about 8 years old. I knew what she was doing and didn't let it happen. She was about 12/13 at the time.

There's a hell of a lot more but these are the few I can only think of now.

Please keep anon or delete!


Are you from Norfolk?
It actually is pretty common, but no one will ever admit to it. Most people will have permanently erased it from their brain after they realised how sick it was.

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