Mother has no respect for my privacy!

I can understand how frustrating this must be. Your mum must feel really deperate to behave in this way. She obviously thinks that you have stuff you want to hide and that is what worries her. I know it mustn't feel like it but it does show she really cares about you. She is just scared. As has already been suggested you could have drugs in the box and that would be something she would be desperate to talk to you about.
However you are old enough to be entitled to your privacy and if she doesn't have anything to fear regarding drugs why not tell her? It sounds like you have tried to tackle her intrusive behaviour before in a mature and sensible way. Sometimes you just need to keep trying!

Reply 201

Indian_Prince

15

Original post by The_Timepasser

I've read the whole thread and I think ur comments about whites were totally unnecessary :mad:

Having a need for privacy has nothing to do with that, Im Asian and I very well need my own space even though I've got nothing to hide.

As regards the doors in India being open, its only to let in fresh air as most people dont have the luxury of acs and it can get quite hot.

nice choice of words bruv roflmao

Reply 202

Philbert

17

It's got to be condoms or sex toys. Or perhaps something completely "innocent" but private.

Replace the contents of the box, as others have suggested.

Reply 203

dungeonkeepr

Don't yell. I know, it's tempting, but when you yell nothing gets done because both of you begin to feel persecuted.

Calmly ask her why she feels the need to look in the box. Mention nothing else, deal purely with this one issue and the emotions around it. That way you don't look like you're being accusatory, just asking for knowledge. Be prepared to open the box to show her there's nothing bad in there, maybe old pokemon cards or whatever, keepsakes. Tell her, calmly, how her trying to get into the box makes you feel.

If this doesn't work at all, if you have a friend you can stay with for a few days, while you both calm down, I suggest you try this. It's possible she doesn't realise quite how much her need to find out about your life/things is driving you away from her.

Whatever you do, do it calmly. Keep breathing evenly and don't yell or scream

I woke up one morning to find my dad looking for my car key in my blazer pocket. He pulled out a tampon. :|
He hasn't looked in there since.
Try something like that.

Reply 207

The_Timepasser

15

Original post by Manesh2468

lol bruv what was the point in doing this haha, you know im right no use arguing :tongue:

and they do "own" you untill you are above the age of 18, untill then you are under there supervision which means they have the right to check your things, unless they have been baught by yourself personaly which i highly doubt being that they had to cry about it on a forum... and the arguments against the house, its there parents house, the kid does not pay any rent through a formal contract which means even if they pay "rent" (makes them feel happy that they are "old" enough) the property/rooms in the house are still the parents property, just cose they say "this is your room" to make the kid feel more mature and happy does not mean it is actually theres.... and the only way there is going to be any real lack of trust is if the child is a trouble child who is not worth trusting due to hindsight over the years of raising the kid...

if the kid lived in there own house and there parent came to search through everything then this would be a whole new argument.

Whats that supposed to mean...u've already been proven wrong by me and several others!

Well they mite be ur guardians who are responsible for u but we are talking abt parents here not some business contract...they may not be obliged to legally but considering the fact that they love u and out of general human rights they should give u some basic privacy. I understand abt the parents still owning the room and the things in it, but it doesnt mean they can flick through ur things without good reason. A child mite officially become an adult at 18, but tht doesnt mean they cant think for themselves/have adult needs for privacy when they're a few years younger than that...it doesnt happen overnight. Not necessarily...many parents will look through every one of their children's things for no reason. One of my Asian friends go through this and he's a bloody angel. Besides its the parent's job to atleast have a conversation wid the kid and motivate them to not repeat past mistakes before resorting to this.

Reply 208

BreatheDeep

12

Take a crap in the box. That'll teach her.

Reply 209

The_Timepasser

15

Original post by Manesh2468

nice choice of words bruv roflmao

Original post by Manesh2468

nah i aint, its aight when they call everyone asians in one group .. muslims, hindus, chinese, japense, all get put into one group, is that not generalisation in itself and the pricks were saying i generalise, is it not slightly racist that they group us all into one group and call us "asians", all i said was "typical white people" that is not racist...

anyways you got murked by my argument back at you haha :tongue:

hahaha i like how you called me racist but you called them "whites" anyways roflmao.

I had no idea there was something insulting wid the term "whites", and it was pretty obvious what i meant. In any case it was more of a grammatical mistake than anything of malicious intent. Lets not get pedantric here, jus like u wouldnt want ppl to criticize ur typing.

Well, its def wrong to generalize any race or group of people but thats not the point...u said it without any provocation on this occasion. And I dont really have anything against the term Asian, we're frm Asia innit? Thats why there is East Asian and South Asian, who while u cant generalise us as, we do share cultural similarities with.

Reply 210

The_Timepasser

15

haha thanx...finally we agree :tongue:

Drum roll please

Original post by Ilios_Lampros

Make it so she can get into the box (eg leave the key lying around) and then put something in there to throw her off.

Make her feel guilty by putting photos of her and your family in there. Write a list that makes it look like you are planning an amazing surprise for her - when she ;ooks inside she'll 'ruin' it!

A nail bomb ?

Reply 213

Indian_Prince

15

Original post by The_Timepasser

Whats that supposed to mean...u've already been proven wrong by me and several others!

Well they mite be ur guardians who are responsible for u but we are talking abt parents here not some business contract...they may not be obliged to legally but considering the fact that they love u and out of general human rights they should give u some basic privacy. I understand abt the parents still owning the room and the things in it, but it doesnt mean they can flick through ur things without good reason. A child mite officially become an adult at 18, but tht doesnt mean they cant think for themselves/have adult needs for privacy when they're a few years younger than that...it doesnt happen overnight. Not necessarily...many parents will look through every one of their children's things for no reason. One of my Asian friends go through this and he's a bloody angel. Besides its the parent's job to atleast have a conversation wid the kid and motivate them to not repeat past mistakes before resorting to this.

your argument is pointless, i already said it aint a business contract.... and what do you mean by "they may not be obliged to legally but considering the fact that they love u and out of general human rights they should give u some basic privacy" what are they not obliged to legally do?, the only main reason parents are going to go through all your stuff is if you have set up ann atmosphere in which you cannot be trusted as i said most likely a trouble child, everyone has a need for privacy and that is fine, but what everyone doesnt get is, they can get privacy if they are trusted by there family, which is not the case when there is something straight in front of the family and they ask what it is? and the child reacts in a silly manner e.g. none of your business, which immediatly would trigger a question in the parents mind questioning the trustworthiness of the child leading to a lack of privacy when the parent goes through everything.... haha you say its the parents job to have a conversation with the kid and to motivate them not to repeat past mistakes, but is the parents questioning about what the child is hiding not a attempt at making a conversation in itself? and most children once reaching the teenage age will not take the advice from there parents and will most likely reble instead... in this case the mother did ask what was in the box, if the girl had told her then there would most likely be no further action so yeh your argument is completely pointless... and by the way your writing is exactly the same as mine in which you used "u" and "tht" alot but watch how you wont get commented about it because they actually like that you are on there side, even if your argument is more and more seemingly pointless, and lol just because theres a majority against a minority doesnt make me wrong, it just shows that the saying about sheep following the hurd is true.

Reply 214

SamHey789

8

Go psycho next time she goes through your stuff!

Reply 215

Indian_Prince

15

Original post by The_Timepasser

I had no idea there was something insulting wid the term "whites", and it was pretty obvious what i meant. In any case it was more of a grammatical mistake than anything of malicious intent. Lets not get pedantric here, jus like u wouldnt want ppl to criticize ur typing.

Well, its def wrong to generalize any race or group of people but thats not the point...u said it without any provocation on this occasion. And I dont really have anything against the term Asian, we're frm Asia innit? Thats why there is East Asian and South Asian, who while u cant generalise us as, we do share cultural similarities with.

haha ofcourse , i know what you meant by whites being a hindu myself i know how the term is used so dont make excuses roflmao, your need to argue with me lead to that roflmao nice excuse though :tongue:

ofcourse it was a grammatical mistake, just to whipe some ass huh, haha people criticizing my typing was completely pointless, they had no reasons to go against my points and so picked on pointless things to try put me down but it didnt really work because in the end i was laughing at them instead.

nah i wouldnt say im from asia i would say i originate from india, that is a typical generalisation by the society over here but you dont see me complaining.... calling myself asain would imply that i may be from pakistan, china or india and other places, so why not just say india? "asians" was a way to group all brown people into one generalised form, if someone brown does a crime it would be classed as some "asian" did it. And no we dont share cultural similarities appart from the religons that rooted off of ours, the chinese and japenese cultures are no where close to being similar with ours.

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 216

Txi

Original post by Manesh2468

haha ofcourse , i know what you meant by whites being a hindu myself i know how the term is used so dont make excuses roflmao, your need to argue with me lead to that roflmao nice excuse though :tongue:

ofcourse it was a grammatical mistake, just to whipe some ass huh, haha people criticizing my typing was completely pointless, they had no reasons to go against my points and so picked on pointless things to try put me down but it didnt really work because in the end i was laughing at them instead.

nah i wouldnt say im from asia i would say i originate from india, that is a typical generalisation by the society over here but you dont see me complaining.... calling myself asain would imply that i may be from pakistan, china or india and other places, so why not just say india? "asians" was a way to group all brown people into one generalised form, if someone brown does a crime it would be classed as some "asian" did it. And no we dont share cultural similarities appart from the religons that rooted of of ours, the chinese and japenese cultures are no where close to being similar with ours.