dating outside your social class..

Scroll to see replies

Does this ever work?
And if anybody has, have there ever been any issues or anything :colondollar:

?

I'd be so nervous about bringing my boyfriend home - about what he may think, etc.
I'm from a typical working class family..

this is relatively topical because of william/kate I guess, but I'm in this situation at the mo!
discuss personal experiences/stories/opinions please :smile:

ok i've not experienced this as such, but surely if he really likes you he'd like you regardless of your home circumstances? being "working class" is hardly something to be ashamed of, and i don't think classes are such a major issue these days! if he knows and understands you're not pish posh, and that you haven't lied to him by telling him you're a princess who lives in a mansion.. i'm sure you'll be fine! invite him round, just make sure the place is clean :wink:

(not doubting it will be!!)

Reply 41

ForKicks

Original post by Anonymous

So basically, I'm not good enough for him?

Rude..

Hang on..you asked for opinions and when he gave his, you said he is rude? Okayy, you are good enough for him, everything will be wonderful. End of thread.

Reply 42

ForKicks

Original post by slavetosociety

Class doesn't really matter these days. Although, race still does.

Class still matters, just only amongst the top certain % (even then not all of them)

Reply 43

mevidek

Original post by Anonymous

Does this ever work?
And if anybody has, have there ever been any issues or anything :colondollar:

I say **** classing.

Reply 44

hatemylife

Original post by jblackmoustache

Kate was hardly a commoner. I'm sick and tired of this romantic image the media have created of a romantic prince falling in love with a woman from a poor mining village. It sucks. It sounds like Disney

Nothing romantic about it.

Reply 45

effofex

Not so fussed about 'class' (it's quite a British thing anyway) - but I'd want her to have at least as much, if not more financial resources and purchasing power than me.

Reply 46

hatemylife

Original post by ForKicks

The way you were brought up, your education, how you think, your manners, accent, ~~income~~, etc.. It's not one single thing, but is based on a general picture of the person

Aside from the crossed out, I'd agree.

Reply 47

ForKicks

Original post by effofex

Not so fussed about 'class' (it's quite a British thing anyway) - but I'd want her to have at least as much, if not more financial resources and purchasing power than me.

For some reason I find it weird a guy wanting a girl with MORE purchasing power. Guess I am old fashioned!

Reply 48

effofex

Original post by ForKicks

For some reason I find it weird a guy wanting a girl with MORE purchasing power. Guess I am old fashioned!

We live in times of gender equality though, right?

Even in modern western societies, many women consider it their fundamental right to only entertain relationships with males with at least as much, if not more financial resources than themselves. Therefore I think it should be perfectly acceptable for a man to think the same way.

Reply 49

snodgrass

I think it totally depends on what we talke the concept of 'class' to be.
I would have absolutely no problem dating somebody very rich or a memeber of the royal family, but I would hate somebody toffy and snobby.
Equally, I wouldn't care if somebody had no money, but if they were rude, lazy and ignorant then I would.
Surely if you like/love the person, then you must already be comfortable with their class. Wealth is a seperate issue.

Reply 50

ForKicks

Original post by effofex

Do you expect girls to open doors for you?

Reply 51

MagicNMedicine

Class does matter a bit more than people think and one thing I've noticed is females are less likely to 'trade down' in terms of class than males are. Maybe it comes down to education as well, in that middle class girls tend to be well educated and they want a guy at least on their own level if not above, in terms of job prospects etc, I also think women are concerned what their friends will think when they get a new boyfriend, so better to have a guy that's a solicitor or something than works on a building site.

I grew up in a fairly deprived part of Manchester and I have friends who live on a council estate there, basically amongst the lads there a lot of them have the pipedream of 'boning posh totty' but it just doesn't happen for them, even the lads who are good looking and popular with girls on the estate, when they try it on with posher girls who are at uni in Manchester, they get fobbed off, probably because their manners and general way of speech marks them out as being not very well educated, working class council estate lads. But amongst the girls on the estate you get two types, chavvy girls who just get with all the lads on the estate, and other girls who have aspirations, particularly ones who have a kid and want a better future for their baby, they struggle working long hours in the hair salon or creche that they work in etc and to them, the idea of trading up to a boyfriend above their social class is like gold dust, because he offers the chance of moving out, ie he has bigger potential earning power. And you will find some of them getting with guys who are accountants and architects etc.

Reply 52

effofex

Original post by ForKicks

Do you expect girls to open doors for you?

If they are in front of me - then yes - it is polite for them to do so. Likewise it would be polite for me to open it for a person behind me (regardless of gender) if I was in front of them, no?

E.g. At the beginning of this week I was moving from one flat to another and a woman held the door open for every piece of luggage I had to carry through.

Reply 53

Anonymous #3

Original post by Broderss

As long as a wealthy upper class girl doesn't go for an illegal immigrant or some African Black migrant working as a public waste disposal technician then it's all ok I think.

What about an Asian/Eastern European migrant???
Why specifically African Black Migrants?

Reply 54

Broderss

Original post by Anonymous

What about an Asian/Eastern European migrant???
Why specifically African Black Migrants?

That was just an example to represent all minority migrants in this country.

Reply 55

anon2010

I am lower class and my boyfriend is middle/upper class.
He went to a private all boys school and I went to a school where kids stabbed their teacher.
He is well off. I have no money (unless I get a goo job after uni).

Yet we have been together over a year. We met at uni and are in love. He is moving away in a few months because he is currently in his final year and he has a job but despite this we are staying together.

We get on very well so the class difference has never really bothered us.
Only problem we have had is that his mum was a little scary to begin with as she has high standards for her son. But I was just polite and respectful of that and now we get on fine. But that could be the case in a same class relationship, meeting the 'rents is always a big deal.

So the answer to your question is; yes different classes can be in good relationships.

Reply 56

ForKicks

Original post by Broderss

As long as a wealthy upper class girl doesn't go for an illegal immigrant or some African Black migrant working as a public waste disposal technician then it's all ok I think.

You don't mean upper class, they are aristocracy! If you mean upper-middle, you claearly haven't met many upper middle girls, lol.

Reply 57

Chillaxer

If two people are that into each other, then yeah why not? Love transcends.

Reply 58

SQ918

My mum came from an upper-middle class family, my grandad was chief accountant and my nan was an executive secretary they own a very successful business, they have a huge retirement house in the Philippines and a massive one in Florida. All their kids(they have 6; mum is the youngest) went to university and have degrees ranging from Medicine to Nursing to Accounting apart from my two uncles who were both drug addicts and university drop outs. My mum has a degree in Nursing.

My dad came from a middle-middle class family, his dad was an architect in Maryland and his mum died when he was 5. He grew up with his step family. His step-mum being a plain housewife. All my dad's half-brothers and half-sisters went to uni as well. My dad has a Degree in Civil Engineering.

When they both met my mum's family didn't have a problem with my dad in fact they liked him so much because 'he had the means' compared to the husband of my auntie who came from a lower- middle class background even if he has a degree and master's in engineering and have a well paid job. My grandparents didn't accept him. The same thing went to the wives of my two uncles. They came from a working class background and my grandad hates them both. My auntie who is a Chartered Accountant and she was a single mum and met someone who came from a middle-class family as well and my grandparents like him. My other auntie-my mum's oldest sister who is a GP met a guy who came from a lower class is hated so much by my grandparents, my mum, my aunties and uncles.

So what do you think?

Reply 59

CJB11

I am working class but have worked in high end sales jobs! In doing so I met an ex gf through work where she was from a far wealthier back ground due to her father who was a self made very nice man! I looked the part as I dress and act a certain way however when it came to opinions and life experiences it could cause conflict mainly from me feeling patronised easily for my failures from somebody who hadn’t experienced too many set backs with essentially life on a plate in comparison! Were talking private education then super car, brand new exclusive address apartment etc etc yet same earnings! This did cause friction and contributed to end of the relationship I had to move home permanently back to my working class town with lifestyle taking a hit significantly! I would say yes unfortunately it can be an issue with compatibility once honeymoon phase goes.