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Guy I like said I don't meet his 'high standards'!

Hey everyone,

I'm feeling a bit upset at the moment because of something a guy I like said the other night. I'll give you some background - have known the guy about 3 years since I started uni but we haven't spoken in a while. I've always had a bit of a crush on him. I'm 23, 5'2 and slim. I've been told by people that I'm pretty and I have a nice personality.

We were talking on Facebook chat the other night and he said he'd been looking through my pictures then asked how tall I am. I told him (5'2) and out of nowhere he said "well I doubt I could ever go out with you! I'm nearly 6 foot and I have standards that you're too short to meet."

I was quite shocked as this came out of the blue - we were just having a normal conversation and I hadn't even suggested I wanted to go out with him! Also he should know my height as we've met in person loads of times so I don't know why he's asking about it now.

It's made me feel a bit upset as I was bullied for my height at school by other girls but accepted it when I got older. It's something I can't change and it's not like I'm a midget lol. My ex-boyfriends have all been quite tall so I've never thought it an issue until now as I used to think I looked fine with my height and weight.

I guess it's made me feel a bit insecure as I used to want to be taller and it's like he's said I'm not good enough for him. He has been single for the 3 years I've known him though and has discussed with me in the past that he has very high standards with girls. I'm thinking of not speaking to him again, as I don't want to speak to people who make me feel bad about myself. :frown:

Edit: It's definitely not a joke as he's discussed this with me before and says he doesn't like being single but he find it difficult with girls because of his high standards and this has caused him to not have proper relationships. He's quite serious, not the type to joke like that

(edited 12 years ago)

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Reply 1

fallout201

Original post by katy_j87

Hey everyone,

I'm feeling a bit upset at the moment because of something a guy I like said the other night. I'll give you some background - have known the guy about 3 years since I started uni but we haven't spoken in a while. I've always had a bit of a crush on him. I'm 23, 5'2 and slim. I've been told by people that I'm pretty and I have a nice personality.

We were talking on Facebook chat the other night and he said he'd been looking through my pictures then asked how tall I am. I told him (5'2) and out of nowhere he said "well I doubt I could ever go out with you! I'm nearly 6 foot and I have very high standards that you're too short to meet."

I was quite shocked as this came out of the blue - we were just having a normal conversation and I hadn't even suggested I wanted to go out with him! Also he should know my height as we've met in person loads of times so I don't know why he's asking about it now.

It's made me feel a bit upset as I was bullied for my height at school by other girls but accepted it when I got older. It's something I can't change and it's not like I'm a midget lol. My ex-boyfriends have all been quite tall so I've never thought it an issue until now as I used to think I looked fine with my height and weight.

I guess it's made me feel a bit insecure as I used to want to be taller and it's like he's said I'm not good enough for him. He has been single for the 3 years I've known him though so maybe this is because of his 'high standards' lol. I'm thinking of not speaking to him again, as I don't want to speak to people who make me feel bad about myself. :frown:

I think you're only 2 inches shorter than average height anyway. Btw, did you ask him if he was joking? Because it was facebook chat, its going to be kinda hard to pick up sarcasm through text. If he wasn't joking, move onto the next one. Simple.

Reply 2

j.laurence

He's nearly 6 foot? He isn't very tall either... and just for the record 5'2 is a decent height for a girl

Guys with 'high standards' are nobs, if he is clearly making you feel down about yourself then stop the contact with him, plenty of other good guys out there.

Reply 3

cucumber

He sounds like a simpleton, to be honest.

Reply 4

Beanz123

Screw him, loads of people (myself included) find petite girls incredibly attractive

Also it sounds like it may have just been a thoughtless pun rather than a statement of his feelings

Reply 5

csea

I think he was joking babe

Reply 6

Kareir

Original post by katy_j87

Hey everyone,

I'm feeling a bit upset at the moment because of something a guy I like said the other night. I'll give you some background - have known the guy about 3 years since I started uni but we haven't spoken in a while. I've always had a bit of a crush on him. I'm 23, 5'2 and slim. I've been told by people that I'm pretty and I have a nice personality.

We were talking on Facebook chat the other night and he said he'd been looking through my pictures then asked how tall I am. I told him (5'2) and out of nowhere he said "well I doubt I could ever go out with you! I'm nearly 6 foot and I have very high standards that you're too short to meet."

I was quite shocked as this came out of the blue - we were just having a normal conversation and I hadn't even suggested I wanted to go out with him! Also he should know my height as we've met in person loads of times so I don't know why he's asking about it now.

It's made me feel a bit upset as I was bullied for my height at school by other girls but accepted it when I got older. It's something I can't change and it's not like I'm a midget lol. My ex-boyfriends have all been quite tall so I've never thought it an issue until now as I used to think I looked fine with my height and weight.

I guess it's made me feel a bit insecure as I used to want to be taller and it's like he's said I'm not good enough for him. He has been single for the 3 years I've known him though so maybe this is because of his 'high standards' lol. I'm thinking of not speaking to him again, as I don't want to speak to people who make me feel bad about myself. :frown:

Hahaha. ahaha. Clearly a joke, just ask if he was serious. it honestly sounds lighthearted though.

_Kar.

Reply 7

teh_samby

Was he trying to make a joke? "HIGH standards"...

Reply 8

mauvetard

you deserve better :smile:

Reply 9

Irrelevance

Whilst he was blunt, at least he was honest and straight out told you where you stand. That being said, it sounds like a joke :holmes:

Reply 10

katy_j87

He wasn't joking lol, it would have been fine if he was but he's discussed his standards with me before and talked about how he finds it hard to find a girl that's good enough. He's quite serious about this

Reply 11

xnatalie01x

I'm sure it was a joke, tbh most guys like shorter girls from my experience!

Edit: just saw your post above... forget about him in that case :smile:

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 12

o Rebecca o

He may have been joking...

Reply 13

o Rebecca o

Original post by katy_j87

You can't be sure, if you're speaking through screen then you can't see his body language.

Reply 14

Philosoraptor

Pshhh no guy would turn down a girl just for height that's crazy - petite girls can be insanely hot.

If he's definitely not joking I'd just leave it tbh

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

I'd say give him the boot. Because if a guy can say something so hurtful to you then obviously he is going to objectify you and is not going to treat you right; as according to him you are not up to his standards. As you stated earlier, people have said that you are pretty... If he can't see that, this great and beautiful flower blossoming at his feet then, truly he doesn't deserve you. My advice is, just hang in there and there will soon come a guy who would turn a blind eye to all those uneccessary aspects about you and love you for who you are. :smile:

Reply 16

Casshern1456

What an absolute douche, ignore him from now on.

Reply 17

newts2k

Original post by katy_j87

Hey everyone,

I'm feeling a bit upset at the moment because of something a guy I like said the other night. I'll give you some background - have known the guy about 3 years since I started uni but we haven't spoken in a while. I've always had a bit of a crush on him. I'm 23, 5'2 and slim. I've been told by people that I'm pretty and I have a nice personality.

We were talking on Facebook chat the other night and he said he'd been looking through my pictures then asked how tall I am. I told him (5'2) and out of nowhere he said "well I doubt I could ever go out with you! I'm nearly 6 foot and I have very high standards that you're too short to meet."

I was quite shocked as this came out of the blue - we were just having a normal conversation and I hadn't even suggested I wanted to go out with him! Also he should know my height as we've met in person loads of times so I don't know why he's asking about it now.

It's made me feel a bit upset as I was bullied for my height at school by other girls but accepted it when I got older. It's something I can't change and it's not like I'm a midget lol. My ex-boyfriends have all been quite tall so I've never thought it an issue until now as I used to think I looked fine with my height and weight.

I guess it's made me feel a bit insecure as I used to want to be taller and it's like he's said I'm not good enough for him. He has been single for the 3 years I've known him though so maybe this is because of his 'high standards' lol. I'm thinking of not speaking to him again, as I don't want to speak to people who make me feel bad about myself. :frown:

haha, its normally the girls who have the 'high standards.' Anyway, he sounds like a bit of a shallow prick to say that and I would just move on, do you really want to date someone who judges you on something you can't control?

at "nearly 6 foot"

Maybe he is playing games with you.. sort of like 'you can't have me' which is think is really immature. Maybe he is a commitment phobic and doesn't really want anyone getting close to him so don't waste your time.