going out alone

Ethers1989

So I'm home alone this weekend and many of my friends have gone away for the weekend too. But i'm really keen to go out and meet some new people tonight, but have no one to tag along with. So if i want to meet new people tonight, it means going out by myself.

Never done it before and i can imagine when i walk into a bar by myself im going to feel slightly self conscious about it and worried that everyone is going to notice I'm alone instantly and judge me for it.

I'm basically just up for spending half and hour or so at a time in a few bars and striking up conversation. I'm a single guy and would be up for chatting to a few lasses tonight, maybeeee even being cheeky and getting a number from one.

Anyone ever gone out by themselves? How was it? Any advice for me, i.e how to behave, how to approach people, what to talk to people about and what to wear?

Cheers!!!!

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Reply 1

Captain Slow

I'm contemplating doing this in a few weeks, let me know how it goes!

Reply 2

Ethers1989

Original post by Captain Slow

I'm contemplating doing this in a few weeks, let me know how it goes!

Shall do buddy, i'll make a note to PM you

Reply 3

Ashley69

watching this tread...

Reply 4

Ethers1989

Original post by Ashley69

watching this tread...

curious about flying solo yourself?

Reply 5

Zamolxes

Girls have a very easy time flying solo, unless they're very very unattractive.

Guys on the other hand, have a quite difficult time flying solo, unless they're very very attractive.

But yeah, I'm watching this too :P

Wierd...

Why dont you just have a chilled night this evening, and wait til your mates get back?

Reply 8

GlitterFreak

I think it depends really. I have been on nights out and seen a few guys on their own. Often I have avoided them as I thought they might be more pervy as one guy continually looked around for someone.

But, if you're in a loud place where a lot is happening and the drinks are flowing more, I don't really think people will care as they will be too busy focused on what is going on rather than if the guy talking to them is on his own or not.

HTH

Reply 9

Ethers1989

Original post by GlitterFreak

Cool, I think i'll head to a new bar near my house thats just opened later on this evening, have a drink or two there and see what happens. But I'll head into the city later round about 10ish to a few louder bars. I'm quite interested to see how this goes. Uncharted territory and all that!

Reply 10

sil3nt_cha0s

Going to a bar/club on your own... got to be one of the saddest (and because you're a guy, creepiest) things ever.

Just think of it this way - if you told your parents or your friends who have gone away that you went to a bar/club on your own, they would think you were weird, no matter how many recluses on TSR think it's normal.

Reply 11

Ethers1989

Original post by Sherkba

Why dont you just have a chilled night this evening, and wait til your mates get back?

That would not help me meet new people, which i'm keen to do! With it been freshers week and all that i feel as though i should get into the mix - even though I'm a final year student!

Reply 12

Ethers1989

Original post by sil3nt_cha0s

Gender shouldnt really make it any worse, some guys would perceive a girl going out on her own as needy and desperate i would have thought?

but thanks for the input, good to get a balanced view!

Reply 13

GlitterFreak

Original post by Ethers1989

Yeah that sounds like a good plan. Also, you could start off by talking to the bartenders and then I am sure others may join in the conversation. That way you are also approachable.
Also, if it doesn't work out well, you have lost nothing and you don't know anyone so it will be fine either way.
Let us know how it goes!

Reply 14

GlitterFreak

Original post by sil3nt_cha0s

That's extreme.
I have seen people out on their own before, how do you think people meet new people?
People pop into pubs/bars for a drink on their own after work sometimes.

Reply 15

sil3nt_cha0s

Original post by GlitterFreak

That's extreme.
I have seen people out on their own before, how do you think people meet new people?
People pop into pubs/bars for a drink on their own after work sometimes.

In normal ways, by making friends at school/work/uni course, going to clubs, gym, going to house parties with a few friends with the intention of making more friends, meeting people through friends.

Not on your own in a club or bar on a Saturday night.

If you had any sense, you'd see how weird it is.

Reply 16

Ashley69

Original post by sil3nt_cha0s

i think thats wrong and totally shallow.

Reply 17

Ethers1989

Original post by sil3nt_cha0s

I was rather polite to you and thanked you for your input, but don't start saying we dont have sense and that I'm "weird" for wanting to be outgoing.

It can't be "weird" if many other people do it.

I'll report back and see how it goes. Any advice from people about things to talk about / the sort of place i should go?

Reply 18

GlitterFreak

Anyway.
To the OP, things to talk about. Well you said it is a new bar, you talk about that to people - what they think of it. If you are into sports, and you are chatting to a guy, you could mention the England rugby game earlier? Then once you have a little bit going on, ask them their name, or introduce yourself. Then I am sure they will start to think of things to say. Ask what they do professionally?
People love to talk about themselves - just indulge that fact.

Reply 19

dgeorge

Original post by Ethers1989

You can talk to other single people guys OR small groups of guys. I've done it several times, I want to go out, but my friends hardly party. generally just go up to one/ a few guys, tell them that your friends are lame and punked out on going out with you. 9/10 times they'll b cool with it.

Alternatively you could do the same thing with girls.

The most important thing to remember is to RELAX, have fun, and be as friendly as possible. You MAY run into one or two a holes, but in general most people will b cool with it