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I think Lovehunter is taking a very black and white view in this case. Yes, men on average have the edge over women when it comes to fertility; the decline is slow and gradual, whereas for women there is a definite cut off point. But generally, men over 40 still have a hard time finding a partner much younger than them if they don't have something to compensate for their old age.

Take a look at www.hotornot.com and look at the comments in the different age groups. There are no women in their late 20s making positive comments about men over 40 because they're looking for men in their age group. Men generally prefer women around their age upto 35, but start for looking younger once over 35 because it's to their advantage if they want to have children. Generally, men have girlfriends around their age over 40 if they're not looking to start a family and they don't have anything to compensate.
Reply 61
Original post by Pink Bullets
Like I said, exceptions. A 40 year old man who both looks 25 and is wealthy is exceptionally rare. You are describing a situation that applies to perhaps one man in a thousand. And yet, every teenage boy on TSR assumes he'll end up being in the .1% rather than the 99.9%.

As a 23 year old woman, there is absolutely no chance I would consider a serious relationship with any man older than about 32. If he really looks 25, then he might be suitable for a short term fling, sure. This is typical of most women my age. Yes, you get the odd young woman who has a fetish for significantly older man, but the vast, vast majority of 20-something year old women would prefer a partner who is 0-10 years older than them.


Fine. But do you agree that when that 23 year old woman approaches 30, her value in the sexual market place declines, where as a 23 year old man will see his value increase in the same time frame? And that when that 30 year old woman gets to 40 her value has decreased significantly, while for the man it may have decreased but not at the same rate?

When the 23 year old guys around you get to 40, they are going to be in a lot better position than you. There is just no way of getting around that fact.
Reply 62
Original post by Artvandelay
Of course there are a lot of men at 40+ with, younger, attractive women but despite a pretty face, they are usually not the type of women most intelligent men are looking for. I know a lot of guys of that type and their younger women are from Russia, Poland, Lithuania etc., and are basically looking for an employed, wealthy man and that's it.


How do you know what "intelligent men" are looking for? There is a difference between what society tells intelligent men they SHOULD be looking for and what they actually want. Russian, Polish and Lithuanian women on average are very attractive. And if you are talking about education, let's take a look here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-11203790

Poland as an example has the 4th highest rate of university graduates at 57%, while the UK is at a pitiful 35%. So, why do you say that "intelligent men" wouldn't want these women? In fact, I think most of these intelligent men should be skipping the UK and making a bee line for Poland.

Edit: Russia rate of university graduation rate is 55.5%

http://www.csmonitor.com/USA/Education/2010/0809/Countries-with-the-highest-college-graduation-rates/Russia-55.5-percent
(edited 12 years ago)
Original post by ManAbout
How do you know what "intelligent men" are looking for? There is a difference between what society tells intelligent men they SHOULD be looking for and what they actually want. Russian, Polish and Lithuanian women on average are very attractive. And if you are talking about education, let's take a look here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-11203790

Poland as an example has the 4th highest rate of university graduates at 57%, while the UK is at a pitiful 35%. So, why do you say that "intelligent men" wouldn't want these women? In fact, I think most of these intelligent men should be skipping the UK and making a bee line for Poland.


I know there are a lot of educated women from those countries, but I thought from the way I described the situation, that people would get the general idea. Meaning that the typical younger female those business alpha male gets is not the Phd-type, but the former model-type. Irregardless of what the statistics are in those countries.

Maybe British women are nothing better, I don't know, I'm Scandinavian and don't know that many British women.
Reply 64
Original post by Artvandelay
I know there are a lot of educated women from those countries, but I thought from the way I described the situation, that people would get the general idea. Meaning that the typical younger female those business alpha male gets is not the Phd-type, but the former model-type. Irregardless of what the statistics are in those countries.

Maybe British women are nothing better, I don't know, I'm Scandinavian and don't know that many British women.


A lot of those former model types in these countries are also highly educated. You are making the same assumption that men are accused of all the time. Just because a woman is beautiful, it doesn't mean she can't be educated and intelligent.

I actually find your assumption shocking given that you come from Scandinavia, a region that is in the forefront of equal rights and feminism.
Original post by ManAbout
A lot of those former model types in these countries are also highly educated. You are making the same assumption that men are accused of all the time. Just because a woman is beautiful, it doesn't mean she can't be educated and intelligent.

I actually find your assumption shocking given that you come from Scandinavia, a region that is in the forefront of equal rights and feminism.


Whoa, hang on.
This has nothing to do with feminism, I don't know why you brought that up.
First of all, I have personal experience with what you are describing; yes some people find it hard to believe that I am a business student with excellent grades simply because I am blonde and have looks on my side. I have not in any way implied that there is a contradiction between looks and intelligence. Choosing modeling as a way of life and full-time employment is a case of its own. I know plenty of models, and plenty of East European women. I know girls from Lithuania with an Msc from LSE - yes, there are some of them, but those are not the girls I am talking about. I did not say anything about what "all" East European women are like - I know them, I have been in those countries, you could say plenty of negative things about the culture there, but I am not going to go in on that. Done talking about that, people clearly misinterpret things here and dig into details, so I'm not going to comment more on it.

What I was SIMPLY saying is that if a woman is 25, beautiful, well-educated etc., she can have her choice with men, and there is no reason why a 40 year old man with money should have an advantage over a 30 year old man with money (and the same general assets). An age gap is not desirable, and a woman who could have things her way could easily choose not to be someone's second wife and not marry some eternal bachelor. But yes a 40 year old man will have an advantage over a 40 year old WOMAN.
Reply 66
Lucretius suggested that women get uglier as they get older so they can become good mothers; that is, if they were beautiful then they would get distracted by men and be bad mothers! Some of his views about women and sex are funny to read.
Reply 67
Original post by Artvandelay
Whoa, hang on.
This has nothing to do with feminism, I don't know why you brought that up.


Because first you stated that the only type of women that a 40 year old man could get are the ones from Russia, Poland, Lithuania etc. that no "intelligent man" would want.

Then when I challenged you on that statement, you said it was because the type of women you were talking about were former models and not PhDs.

You evidently made the assumption that beautiful, former models could not be intelliegent, educated or PhDs. When in fact this is far from the truth, specially in E Europe countries where the graduation rate from university is much higher than the UK. I have met stunning engineers, dentists etc. from these countries. These are exactly the type of women any intelligent man would want.
Reply 68
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
though you are somewhat irritating, ok then, what the hell. First picture is me aged 25. Second picture is me aged 27. Though I'm not exactly wow material in either, I can't really think that there's any doubt that my before photo is worse than my after photo. Thus your "women always look better when they're younger" theory is a load of tosh.

http://a8.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/217678_10100162559972289_197812287_54511723_3347603_n.jpg

http://a2.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/284784_10100249243492819_197812287_56012265_4862987_n.jpg

Worst comparison ever. You could have at least not made it so biased..
Original post by Converse
Worst comparison ever. You could have at least not made it so biased..


is there something actually wrong with you upstairs?
Reply 70
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
is there something actually wrong with you upstairs?


I'm going to assume that you misunderstood what I said, otherwise there's probably something wrong with you upstairs.

Fact is, the pictures are biased.
Original post by Converse
I'm going to assume that you misunderstood what I said, otherwise there's probably something wrong with you upstairs.

Fact is, the pictures are biased.


no I didn't misunderstand what you said. Fact is, I was REQUESTED by the OP to post them :rolleyes:
Reply 72
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
no I didn't misunderstand what you said. Fact is, I was REQUESTED by the OP to post them :rolleyes:

I know.

This just proves that you literally have no idea what I'm talking about. You misunderstood the context.
Original post by Converse
I know.

This just proves that you literally have no idea what I'm talking about. You misunderstood the context.


then clearly you're incapable of explaining what you mean in a coherent manner. It's not my fault if you don't make any sense.
Reply 74
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
then clearly you're incapable of explaining what you mean in a coherent manner. It's not my fault if you don't make any sense.

It's not my fault if you misunderstand simple sentences.. Works both ways.

It's hilarious that you try to blame me, even though you're the one who made the mistake.
Original post by Converse
It's not my fault if you misunderstand simple sentences.. Works both ways.

It's hilarious that you try to blame me, even though you're the one who made the mistake.


What I assumed you meant was perfectly logical. If you didn't mean that, then you should have specified in your post instead of making it so ambiguous.

What's hilarious is that you expect other people to be mind readers.
Reply 76
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
What I assumed you meant was perfectly logical. If you didn't mean that, then you should have specified in your post instead of making it so ambiguous.

What's hilarious is that you expect other people to be mind readers.


No it was not logical at all. My post was not ambiguous. You just jumped to a highly illogical conclusion and then accused me of not being specific.

I have not once said that I expect anyone to be a mind-reader..

We may as well just agree to disagree. If you'd like to do that, then please refrain from quoting me again.
Original post by Nepene
The most common is interesting, but the average is more useful. It says what most men and women feel, which is the purpose of the survey. Finding the most common just tells you who the loudest minority is.

Yeah, it's a rather useless survey.


No, the average is averaged out, sometimes no one has said the average at all which is pointless. Both are usually useful, but together. Alone, most common is more accurate.
Reply 78
Original post by Pink Bullets

Also, young women are not attracted to middle aged men, except for exceptional circumstances (see George Clooney as an example). As a 23 year old woman with friends in early-mid 20s, I can say that we very, very rarely find men attractive who are older than 35.


I was going through this thread again and saw this gem which I thought deserved a response.

In my experience, the type of men that women claim to be attracted to is entirely different from the type of men they actually end up going out with.

Almost every day I see attractive women of all ages with the type of men most women say they would not want to date. I see them with all types guys - bald, short, fat, skinny, drunk, no job, old, slobs etc.. etc., basically with every type of guy that does not fit the classical prince charming stereotyping.

So, your statement that you and your 20 something year old friends is not attracted to "x type of guy" doesn't mean much in the real world.
Reply 79
Original post by LipstickKisses
No, the average is averaged out, sometimes no one has said the average at all which is pointless. Both are usually useful, but together. Alone, most common is more accurate.


If you really want to be precise and accurate, a graph is even better. Also, the most common may only be a tiny percentage of people. That's the problem. Unless a lot of people actually like the mode it's possible it gives a wildly inaccurate number. And for our purposes, we can't actually say men like older women because we don't know how common like of 31 is.

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