Eating Disorders and life with one - Discussions, Opinions, Advice.
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Original post by Antiaris
Went through the same thing.
Believe it or not but the acid will begin melting away the oesophagus. If you carry on it can tear it, you are feeling the beginning stages.
Eat some dried apricots, high in potassium, if you are worried about electrolyte imbalance. Oh, and Kale.
Believe it or not but the acid will begin melting away the oesophagus. If you carry on it can tear it, you are feeling the beginning stages.
Eat some dried apricots, high in potassium, if you are worried about electrolyte imbalance. Oh, and Kale.
don't forget bananas!!
I am suffering from binge starve disorder and have been for a few years. Before that I was pretty much anorexic. I've gotten to the point where I feel so ill - tired jumpy weak, disorientated constantly dizzy have brain fog rubbish memory and really low self esteem I'm also a stone overweight. I desperately desperately want to feel normal again adn to eat normally again.
I can't remember the last time that I ate 3 meals in a day - I either stuff myself randomly with sugar or eat hardly anything in the day
I don't know how to stop it literally
I can't remember the last time that I ate 3 meals in a day - I either stuff myself randomly with sugar or eat hardly anything in the day
I don't know how to stop it literally
I'll say one thing for my university, they really seem to care. The dean of students office sent my senior resident to check on me after I sort of missed an appointment (it was cancelled anyway) and reminded me that I needed to make another appointment. It's kind of lovely that they care.
Does anyone get really annoyed at themselves repeating the same patterns over and over again? I've noticed that I keep doing the same things with my medication and the way I randomly drop out of therapy. I'm really trying not to do that this time and I promised my therapist I'd mention it to her if I was feeling like not returning. I feel like that now and the session was pretty good in the sense that we've got plans for the next two weeks. Confusing.
Does anyone get really annoyed at themselves repeating the same patterns over and over again? I've noticed that I keep doing the same things with my medication and the way I randomly drop out of therapy. I'm really trying not to do that this time and I promised my therapist I'd mention it to her if I was feeling like not returning. I feel like that now and the session was pretty good in the sense that we've got plans for the next two weeks. Confusing.
Original post by diamonddust
I'll say one thing for my university, they really seem to care. The dean of students office sent my senior resident to check on me after I sort of missed an appointment (it was cancelled anyway) and reminded me that I needed to make another appointment. It's kind of lovely that they care.
Does anyone get really annoyed at themselves repeating the same patterns over and over again? I've noticed that I keep doing the same things with my medication and the way I randomly drop out of therapy. I'm really trying not to do that this time and I promised my therapist I'd mention it to her if I was feeling like not returning. I feel like that now and the session was pretty good in the sense that we've got plans for the next two weeks. Confusing.
Does anyone get really annoyed at themselves repeating the same patterns over and over again? I've noticed that I keep doing the same things with my medication and the way I randomly drop out of therapy. I'm really trying not to do that this time and I promised my therapist I'd mention it to her if I was feeling like not returning. I feel like that now and the session was pretty good in the sense that we've got plans for the next two weeks. Confusing.
DD, don't drop out, LET them help you. I want you to be the crazy bat in my halls who studies creative writing if I end up at UEA for chem. Not the lass who looks REALLY,really poorly, with all the bones in her back on show.
Buying dresses for Christmas balls is one of the most stressful things ever. For ONE NIGHT I would actually like to feel good about myself. Just one damn night.
Feels so shallow as well.
Feels so shallow as well.
Original post by sentiment
Buying dresses for Christmas balls is one of the most stressful things ever. For ONE NIGHT I would actually like to feel good about myself. Just one damn night.
Feels so shallow as well.
Feels so shallow as well.
I think we all have that problem
Just make sure you buy it with a matching shawl or something in case you feel really exposed and self-conscious. (At my ball, I wore a shawl at first but managed to relax and take it off after a while
)
At my first Uni Christmas ball...
~Kay, at that point I was terrified of chocolate cake and I was afraid a tiramasu would leap out and attack me, and as such I didn't go. (Lol, my computer autocorrects tiramasu to dramatist. Understandable.)
You know what though? You KNOW you want to enjoy, you WANT to enjoy. You are going for you, not to prove anything to ANYBODY apart from proving something to yourself.
That you will look good in ANYTHING.
Girlfriend, don' worry, pick your season, match your shape and you can't go wrong.
~Kay, at that point I was terrified of chocolate cake and I was afraid a tiramasu would leap out and attack me, and as such I didn't go. (Lol, my computer autocorrects tiramasu to dramatist. Understandable.)
You know what though? You KNOW you want to enjoy, you WANT to enjoy. You are going for you, not to prove anything to ANYBODY apart from proving something to yourself.
That you will look good in ANYTHING.
Girlfriend, don' worry, pick your season, match your shape and you can't go wrong.
After not eating for so long because of the side-effects of my anti-depressants, I've had a few days verging on binging (well, binging for me, not by the standards of someone with a regular appetite, but still).
Spoiler
Hi everyone. Been bulimic for the past 8 years. All the more depressing seeing as I just turned 20 a few months ago. How does everybody cope with it? It literally just consumes me to no end. I don't really come from a well to do household, so the food we buy are usually the cheap, staple, and obviously, triggering foodstuffs. There isn't much protein around ever so I'm always surrounded by things trying to drag me in. I've been trying to be a bit healthy (i.e., not purge) for the last half month but it's failing me. I can feel weight seeping on me and I fear I'll revert so square one. Can anybody suggest any inexpensive non triggering meals? Also, any methods would help a lot.
I hope you all stay safe and healthy. Much love.
I hope you all stay safe and healthy. Much love.
(edited 12 years ago)
Original post by sentiment
Buying dresses for Christmas balls is one of the most stressful things ever. For ONE NIGHT I would actually like to feel good about myself. Just one damn night.
Feels so shallow as well.
Feels so shallow as well.
I'm not going to any balls as I'm too fat. I don't even like going for nights out because I feel so huge.
What IS normality?
What IS the norm?
I would LOVE someone to pipe up with a numerical value for it, be it a dress size, height, weight, or some other dimension which dictates a template to which we should be. Because if you should find this magical number, tell me who it was that dictated or determined that number in the first place.
How heavy/tall/grey should an elephant be? Is a centipede with two extra legs a disgusting abomination or an exceptional miracle?
I might seem like I am being abstract here, but think about it.
The only thing we have in common is we are all human beings, right? That's it. The rest of it, we're unique. TOTALLY unique.
"I should be ten stone, I am eleven stone. I must be overweight."
No - eleven stone is perfect for a Billy/Joanne/Mick or whoever you are. You are the perfect representation and version of who you are, not necessarily WHAT you are.
What IS the norm?
I would LOVE someone to pipe up with a numerical value for it, be it a dress size, height, weight, or some other dimension which dictates a template to which we should be. Because if you should find this magical number, tell me who it was that dictated or determined that number in the first place.
How heavy/tall/grey should an elephant be? Is a centipede with two extra legs a disgusting abomination or an exceptional miracle?
I might seem like I am being abstract here, but think about it.
The only thing we have in common is we are all human beings, right? That's it. The rest of it, we're unique. TOTALLY unique.
"I should be ten stone, I am eleven stone. I must be overweight."
No - eleven stone is perfect for a Billy/Joanne/Mick or whoever you are. You are the perfect representation and version of who you are, not necessarily WHAT you are.
"The flesh is temporary, the soul is eternal."
Vide Infra-Killswitch Engage
Vide Infra-Killswitch Engage
Original post by Riku
"The flesh is temporary, the soul is eternal."
Vide Infra-Killswitch Engage
Vide Infra-Killswitch Engage
"You don't have a Soul. You are a Soul. You have a body." - C.S. Lewis
You are not your body, you are not defined by your body, you are not judged by your body. Your body can change without you being a different person.
Spoiler
Still don't understand why I feel so strange when eating sometimes. Kinda like a rush to the head, dizziness or a stabbing pain through the skull, blurry vision and a sense of dissociation from the surroundings really, and I don't always know whether I'm hungry or full or not, the only indicator comes before the meal or once I'm uncomfortably full. Am I getting so worked up about the simple act of feeding that breakfast is enough to send me into fight-or-flight? :
I refuse to believe this is the result of too big a breakfast sending me into insulin overload, or feeling the effects of raising cholesterol or diabetes or any of this friggin bull**** I come up with anymore that wants to give any old excuse for me to give up on all of this hard work. Why can it not be simply that I'm a bit tired or a bit stressed and not feeling that hungry today?
I now know for a fact, though, that part of my fears derive from unfounded prejudices. In all the time I've been a healthy eater and wanting to keep fit, never until this year has there been a sense of moral failure attached to eating more junky stuff. It wasn't until I started looking at pie as something beneath me that I grew genuinely afraid of having it. I don't like that pomposity, there's no neexd to feel so self-righteous, we're only human after all. So munching on a nice hot pie on the bus in it was, and that felt pretty goood.
I refuse to believe this is the result of too big a breakfast sending me into insulin overload, or feeling the effects of raising cholesterol or diabetes or any of this friggin bull**** I come up with anymore that wants to give any old excuse for me to give up on all of this hard work. Why can it not be simply that I'm a bit tired or a bit stressed and not feeling that hungry today?
Spoiler
I now know for a fact, though, that part of my fears derive from unfounded prejudices. In all the time I've been a healthy eater and wanting to keep fit, never until this year has there been a sense of moral failure attached to eating more junky stuff. It wasn't until I started looking at pie as something beneath me that I grew genuinely afraid of having it. I don't like that pomposity, there's no neexd to feel so self-righteous, we're only human after all. So munching on a nice hot pie on the bus in it was, and that felt pretty goood.
(edited 12 years ago)
I have a question, although it may seem stupid.
I spent last night bingeing and purging. Sometimes Im so tired after, but its not just tiredness its extraordinary tiredness and Ive ended up sleeping 22 hours after.
Why is this? Just because its major strain on the body or is there another biochemical/endocrine reason why?
I spent last night bingeing and purging. Sometimes Im so tired after, but its not just tiredness its extraordinary tiredness and Ive ended up sleeping 22 hours after.
Why is this? Just because its major strain on the body or is there another biochemical/endocrine reason why?
Original post by Anonymous
I have a question, although it may seem stupid.
I spent last night bingeing and purging. Sometimes Im so tired after, but its not just tiredness its extraordinary tiredness and Ive ended up sleeping 22 hours after.
Why is this? Just because its major strain on the body or is there another biochemical/endocrine reason why?
I spent last night bingeing and purging. Sometimes Im so tired after, but its not just tiredness its extraordinary tiredness and Ive ended up sleeping 22 hours after.
Why is this? Just because its major strain on the body or is there another biochemical/endocrine reason why?
I guess it could also be because you lose fluids when you purge, and that in turn lowers your electrolite balance, meaning that you are very tired.
Original post by Annie72
I guess it could also be because you lose fluids when you purge, and that in turn lowers your electrolite balance, meaning that you are very tired.
Yeh I suppose that could be it.
Its just such a different tiredness. Like if you have had a hard day at uni or work, and have further study to do even if you are tired, you can work through it.
But with this tiredness following purging, I cant even stand up.
I am seeking help btw I have 2 CBT appointments per week. But because there isnt a time at the moment that Im not eating without purging (I know it sounds ridiculous, but Im right in the depths of this at the moment) Im really worried about what the hell thats doing to my blood chemistry.
The fact im getting this excessive fatigue and stabbing pains in my hands and feet. Isnt doing anything to lessen the worry
Bear in mind to purge you are literally inducing ALL of your torso muscles to convulse in a way that makes them work in reverse.
Imagine forcing the Jack in the Box lever backwards, with how much it rips the internal mechanism to bits, and how much tension builds up inside. Now imagine you're constantly doing that to your body, except inside that Jack in the Box is acidic peptic acids too.
You're forcing your body to jerkily use its mechanisms backwards, opening one-way valves the wrong way and moving muscles in ways they shouldn't. No wonder you're knackered physically.
Chemically, as stated, your electrolytes are probably fran-bamboozled too.
Imagine forcing the Jack in the Box lever backwards, with how much it rips the internal mechanism to bits, and how much tension builds up inside. Now imagine you're constantly doing that to your body, except inside that Jack in the Box is acidic peptic acids too.
You're forcing your body to jerkily use its mechanisms backwards, opening one-way valves the wrong way and moving muscles in ways they shouldn't. No wonder you're knackered physically.
Chemically, as stated, your electrolytes are probably fran-bamboozled too.
Original post by TotoMimo
Bear in mind to purge you are literally inducing ALL of your torso muscles to convulse in a way that makes them work in reverse.
Imagine forcing the Jack in the Box lever backwards, with how much it rips the internal mechanism to bits, and how much tension builds up inside. Now imagine you're constantly doing that to your body, except inside that Jack in the Box is acidic peptic acids too.
You're forcing your body to jerkily use its mechanisms backwards, opening one-way valves the wrong way and moving muscles in ways they shouldn't. No wonder you're knackered physically.
Chemically, as stated, your electrolytes are probably fran-bamboozled too.
Imagine forcing the Jack in the Box lever backwards, with how much it rips the internal mechanism to bits, and how much tension builds up inside. Now imagine you're constantly doing that to your body, except inside that Jack in the Box is acidic peptic acids too.
You're forcing your body to jerkily use its mechanisms backwards, opening one-way valves the wrong way and moving muscles in ways they shouldn't. No wonder you're knackered physically.
Chemically, as stated, your electrolytes are probably fran-bamboozled too.
I know
The only good thing about this is, previously I would purge anything without thinking about it. It was abnormal not to. And although I still have a long way to go, at least I now see this is abnormal and as something that needs to change....I feel guilty for doing it. I feel bad for damaging my body. Before I didnt give a ****.
I just wish I could manage to keep some food down because 1) its making me so tired for the reasons we have discussed and 2) my weight is dropping.
Im not sure how I feel about the second part. For the first time Im questioning whether that is what I want at all. Its weird after having focussed on that for so so long.
Its 4 years in January that Ive not had a normal eating pattern and Id say 2 years since things got really bad.
I mean, to anyone having CBT or IPT....how many appointments or what sort of time frame was it before you saw an improvement?
i guess everyone is different, Im just worried its not going to work. I wouldnt want to stay like this !!
