Pulling in clubs....any girls who want to give advice?
This topic has probably been brought up a lot, so I apologise for that.
However, can any girls out there give me some advice about pulling in clubs. I like to go out, drink, dance etc, but how to approach a girl in a club is difficult. If your online or in a random place(lets say work) then its easy to talk to a girl and have a conversation, but in a club its difficult. Some of my friends just "grind" up girls, some just stare and some try talking to them(even though the music is really loud). But all of these techniques seem to fail quite a lot.
So I ask, from a girl's opinion, how would you like to be approached in a club?
However, can any girls out there give me some advice about pulling in clubs. I like to go out, drink, dance etc, but how to approach a girl in a club is difficult. If your online or in a random place(lets say work) then its easy to talk to a girl and have a conversation, but in a club its difficult. Some of my friends just "grind" up girls, some just stare and some try talking to them(even though the music is really loud). But all of these techniques seem to fail quite a lot.
So I ask, from a girl's opinion, how would you like to be approached in a club?
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Erm....Maybe just something like "Hey, you look really nice/pretty, just thought I would come over and say hello"...If she says thanks just take it from there and ask her name or something.
The last chat up line used on me was ...."I have been starting at you for half an hour now, have you not noticed?" sounds creepy, but it strangely worked!
Grinding isnt a great technique, if you don't have the confidence to go up to a girl and compliment her maybe if you see some girls taking photo's go up to them and ask if they want you to take one of them all? Then take it from there and ask them their name/if they are having a good night.
Nothing will work all the time but you will have more luck attempting to (because we are aware its hard to hold a conversation in a club!) talk to a girl than just rubbing up agaisnt her.
The last chat up line used on me was ...."I have been starting at you for half an hour now, have you not noticed?" sounds creepy, but it strangely worked!
Grinding isnt a great technique, if you don't have the confidence to go up to a girl and compliment her maybe if you see some girls taking photo's go up to them and ask if they want you to take one of them all? Then take it from there and ask them their name/if they are having a good night.
Nothing will work all the time but you will have more luck attempting to (because we are aware its hard to hold a conversation in a club!) talk to a girl than just rubbing up agaisnt her.
When a man approaches me in a club and begins to grind up against me, I genuinely come to the conclusion that they only want sex. Don't get me wrong, I'm not stereotyping the entire male population who go clubbing, but from my own experience that's all they want.
If you just want sex then yes, many of my friends tend to go home with men who start grinding up against them. This then tends to escalate to kissing, more grinding and the eventual going home stage. If that's what you want, then great. Not many people want to get to know the person they are going home to bang and then likely never see again.
If you didn't want just a ons, then your best approach is too offer a girl a drink either whilst she's at the bar/sitting down/dancing with her friends or in an outside area etc. Just innate eye contact, smile and approach her and then ask her. Then This will give you a chance to get to know her and you can find out if your personalities click. (Even if you are wasted.) You can then get her number and text her the next day. Talking about your hangovers and how good/bad the night before was is a conversation starter.
If you just want sex then yes, many of my friends tend to go home with men who start grinding up against them. This then tends to escalate to kissing, more grinding and the eventual going home stage. If that's what you want, then great. Not many people want to get to know the person they are going home to bang and then likely never see again.
If you didn't want just a ons, then your best approach is too offer a girl a drink either whilst she's at the bar/sitting down/dancing with her friends or in an outside area etc. Just innate eye contact, smile and approach her and then ask her. Then This will give you a chance to get to know her and you can find out if your personalities click. (Even if you are wasted.) You can then get her number and text her the next day. Talking about your hangovers and how good/bad the night before was is a conversation starter.
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by Emmzaa
When a man approaches me in a club and begins to grind up against me, I genuinely come to the conclusion that they only want sex. Don't get me wrong, I'm not stereotyping the entire male population who go clubbing, but from my own experience that's all they want.
Original post by ildaf123
Erm....Maybe just something like "Hey, you look really nice/pretty, just thought I would come over and say hello"...If she says thanks just take it from there and ask her name or something.
The last chat up line used on me was ...."I have been starting at you for half an hour now, have you not noticed?" sounds creepy, but it strangely worked!
Grinding isnt a great technique, if you don't have the confidence to go up to a girl and compliment her maybe if you see some girls taking photo's go up to them and ask if they want you to take one of them all? Then take it from there and ask them their name/if they are having a good night.
Nothing will work all the time but you will have more luck attempting to (because we are aware its hard to hold a conversation in a club!) talk to a girl than just rubbing up agaisnt her.
The last chat up line used on me was ...."I have been starting at you for half an hour now, have you not noticed?" sounds creepy, but it strangely worked!
Grinding isnt a great technique, if you don't have the confidence to go up to a girl and compliment her maybe if you see some girls taking photo's go up to them and ask if they want you to take one of them all? Then take it from there and ask them their name/if they are having a good night.
Nothing will work all the time but you will have more luck attempting to (because we are aware its hard to hold a conversation in a club!) talk to a girl than just rubbing up agaisnt her.
Your first suggestion is terrible. XD
This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC One X
Original post by ildaf123
The last chat up line used on me was ...."I have been starting at you for half an hour now, have you not noticed?" sounds creepy, but it strangely worked!
Original post by Llamageddon
That's called "low standards".
Not really it was funny, plus he was one of the hottest men I have ever seen so that probably helped. Anyway I only took his number.
The only time I ever pull is when i'm really drunk and my standards have dropped 
Thank god I can't drink anymore!
The smoking area is usually the best place to meet people because its the only place you can talk! Obviously its not nice but even if you don't smoke and you don't mind the smoke and you have a friend who does smoke you should join them, not even to talk to attractive girls but just for a laugh, sometimes the oddballs you meet outside can make your night!
Thank god I can't drink anymore! The smoking area is usually the best place to meet people because its the only place you can talk! Obviously its not nice but even if you don't smoke and you don't mind the smoke and you have a friend who does smoke you should join them, not even to talk to attractive girls but just for a laugh, sometimes the oddballs you meet outside can make your night!
(edited 11 years ago)
You can sometimes do something when getting drinks, actually make some kind of connection. Otherwise, I have absolutely no ****ing clue.
I guess it is all about perservance and making eye contact and stuff like, as it impossible to hold conversation. Or whatever, who ****ing knows.
I guess it is all about perservance and making eye contact and stuff like, as it impossible to hold conversation. Or whatever, who ****ing knows.
Original post by Inverse
Your first suggestion is terrible. XD
This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC One X
This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC One X
How? Girls like to be complimented, and words like pretty/nice are better than sexy/hot.
I don't like men offering to by me drinks as I feel like they then expect something from me, I don't like guys grinding up on me, I don't like cheesy chat up lines, and if a guy just walks up to me and goes "Hello im bob" or whatever that just seems kind of weird, they need some sort of line and I don't see many alternatives to what I said?
Original post by Emmzaa
When a man approaches me in a club and begins to grind up against me, I genuinely come to the conclusion that they only want sex. Don't get me wrong, I'm not stereotyping the entire male population who go clubbing, but from my own experience that's all they want.
What's wrong with only wanting sex?
And why are you trying to make men feel guilty or ashamed for wanting sex? Women want sex just as much as men (you just won't admit it).
Isn't sex the fundamental reason that people of different sexes get together?
So I don't get why you complain about guys who 'just want sex'?
Original post by Rocking_Horse
What's wrong with only wanting sex?
And why are you trying to make men feel guilty or ashamed for wanting sex? Women want sex just as much as men (you just won't admit it).
Isn't sex the fundamental reason that people of different sexes get together?
So I don't get why you complain about guys who 'just want sex'?
And why are you trying to make men feel guilty or ashamed for wanting sex? Women want sex just as much as men (you just won't admit it).
Isn't sex the fundamental reason that people of different sexes get together?
So I don't get why you complain about guys who 'just want sex'?
When did I say that something is wrong with only wanting sex? Or when did I try and make men feel guilty or ashamed for wanting sex? I will openly admit I want sex and I have gone home with people from nightclubs before. I was simply saying that they just wanted sex. I just said that when a man grinds against me he just wants sex, not a relationship/I want to get to know you, so in response to the OP I was making a statement about the ways to go about pulling a girl in a club and the way women interpret your actions.
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by Emmzaa
When did I say that something is wrong with only wanting sex? Or when did I try and make men feel guilty or ashamed for wanting sex? I will openly admit I want sex and I have gone home with people from nightclubs before. I was simply saying that they just wanted sex. I just said that when a man grinds against me he just wants sex, not a relationship/I want to get to know you, so in response to the OP I was making a statement about the ways to go about pulling a girl in a club and the way women interpret your actions.
A lot of women try and put men on a guilt trip, by saying things such as 'all men only want one thing' or 'you just want to get into my pants!', blah blah blah. It cracks me up....I mean DUH....OF COURSE WE WANT SEX. THAT'S WHY WE MEN APPROACH WOMEN.
Surely women have figured this out by now and aren't dense enough to think men approach them for platonic friendship or something????
The way your post was worded was as if you were a typical girl complaining about how 'men only want sex'. I mean duh!
Original post by ildaf123
How? Girls like to be complimented, and words like pretty/nice are better than sexy/hot.
I don't like men offering to by me drinks as I feel like they then expect something from me, I don't like guys grinding up on me, I don't like cheesy chat up lines, and if a guy just walks up to me and goes "Hello im bob" or whatever that just seems kind of weird, they need some sort of line and I don't see many alternatives to what I said?
I don't like men offering to by me drinks as I feel like they then expect something from me, I don't like guys grinding up on me, I don't like cheesy chat up lines, and if a guy just walks up to me and goes "Hello im bob" or whatever that just seems kind of weird, they need some sort of line and I don't see many alternatives to what I said?
You don't universally represent what every girl likes and dislikes.
Well, the sentence which you used in your example would probably make a lot of girls cringe. I've seen similar things happen; the guy either gets completely ignored or it begins a conversation and that's all it gets to.
This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC One X
Don't buy them a drink straight away it's too full on for my personal liking.
Try being a tad flirtatious without being too full on. Winking etc,
Then after you see she's interested, go up to her and say hi,
Then things should go well after that.
This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App
Try being a tad flirtatious without being too full on. Winking etc,
Then after you see she's interested, go up to her and say hi,
Then things should go well after that.
This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App
Original post by carpboy
This topic has probably been brought up a lot, so I apologise for that.
However, can any girls out there give me some advice about pulling in clubs. I like to go out, drink, dance etc, but how to approach a girl in a club is difficult. If your online or in a random place(lets say work) then its easy to talk to a girl and have a conversation, but in a club its difficult. Some of my friends just "grind" up girls, some just stare and some try talking to them(even though the music is really loud). But all of these techniques seem to fail quite a lot.
So I ask, from a girl's opinion, how would you like to be approached in a club?
However, can any girls out there give me some advice about pulling in clubs. I like to go out, drink, dance etc, but how to approach a girl in a club is difficult. If your online or in a random place(lets say work) then its easy to talk to a girl and have a conversation, but in a club its difficult. Some of my friends just "grind" up girls, some just stare and some try talking to them(even though the music is really loud). But all of these techniques seem to fail quite a lot.
So I ask, from a girl's opinion, how would you like to be approached in a club?
When you're trying to learn how to fish, you ask the fisherman, not the trout.
Original post by Inverse
You don't universally represent what every girl likes and dislikes.
Well, the sentence which you used in your example would probably make a lot of girls cringe. I've seen similar things happen; the guy either gets completely ignored or it begins a conversation and that's all it gets to.
This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC One X
Well, the sentence which you used in your example would probably make a lot of girls cringe. I've seen similar things happen; the guy either gets completely ignored or it begins a conversation and that's all it gets to.
This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC One X
No I dont represent every girl, I didn't claim to as I continuingly put "I" before each point, where as you stated that that line was "awful".
Yeah a lot of the time it wont work, and I agree it could be cringey and it has been cringey when done to me before, but if a guy pulls it off I have found it to be sweet and most effective, and since im a girl and this thread is asking girls for suggestions on how to approach us, and I have found that guys who are nice to girls and compliment them tend to get further by personal experience and by watching it happen it is in no way a bad suggestion.
Original post by ildaf123
No I dont represent every girl, I didn't claim to as I continuingly put "I" before each point, where as you stated that that line was "awful".
Yeah a lot of the time it wont work, and I agree it could be cringey and it has been cringey when done to me before, but if a guy pulls it off I have found it to be sweet and most effective, and since im a girl and this thread is asking girls for suggestions on how to approach us, and I have found that guys who are nice to girls and compliment them tend to get further by personal experience and by watching it happen it is in no way a bad suggestion.
Yeah a lot of the time it wont work, and I agree it could be cringey and it has been cringey when done to me before, but if a guy pulls it off I have found it to be sweet and most effective, and since im a girl and this thread is asking girls for suggestions on how to approach us, and I have found that guys who are nice to girls and compliment them tend to get further by personal experience and by watching it happen it is in no way a bad suggestion.
I guess it would take a lot of confidence to do!
This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC One X
Grinding is awful. Do not.
When I think back at the guys I've met in clubs (not many tbh, but it's rare that I meet someone I genuinely fancy anyway, in clubs or other venues), they've both started with a moderately confident 'hey, how are you'.
If you see an attractive girl, you will obviously look at her. Most people can somewhat notice when someone is looking at you. Don't stare obsessively, but have a look over at her a couple of times. Don't keep eye contact forever, but make sure she sees you. If she smiles back, or looks pleased/blushes, wait a few minutes before you walk over and ask how she is.
When I think back at the guys I've met in clubs (not many tbh, but it's rare that I meet someone I genuinely fancy anyway, in clubs or other venues), they've both started with a moderately confident 'hey, how are you'.
If you see an attractive girl, you will obviously look at her. Most people can somewhat notice when someone is looking at you. Don't stare obsessively, but have a look over at her a couple of times. Don't keep eye contact forever, but make sure she sees you. If she smiles back, or looks pleased/blushes, wait a few minutes before you walk over and ask how she is.
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