The Long Distance Relationship Society Advice Centre

Totally agree with this! My bf didn't seem fussed at all about leaving for uni and us being apart in the weeks leading up to it, and I knew he was excited to be moving and meeting people. But when I left him he got really quiet and pulled his sad face Boys like to act brave and tough and be manly and strong and they don't like to show when they're feeling sad. Chances are he's feeling some pretty mixed emotions right now about moving and leaving. Don't worry too much, just focus on enjoying the time you have left and let him go with some great memories of you


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Totally agree with the emotions. I've sometimes been so tempted to just shout 'SHOW SOME EMOTION! PLEASE.'

Will not check my phone....will not check my phone....I can't stop checking my phone and sending him random texts D: Even though I know he's too busy to answer them

How can one deal with a long distance relationship. i want to know how it works

skynplanet.com

I'm technically in a LDR, but not as long distance as for many of you. My fiance is 27 and he's back where I live, in full-time work. We've been together nearly two years and I've just started at university around two hours away from him, which doesn't sound like much but when petrol/bus fare money is expensive, it's a lot as you can probably tell by the fact that we're engaged, we have a pretty intense relationship - we know what we want in the future and we've planned it in detail, so we're not exactly in any danger of breaking up!
I think I'm handling the distance better than he is, he sees Facebook pictures of me partying and drinking and feels left out, but he's said he never wants me to not go out or miss anything for fear of how it would affect him - he's incredibly selfless and always puts others first, which can sometimes result in him being left out. I text him so often, we call each other every day and video chat frequently too, which makes it a little easier, but I do miss him - I used to see him so often that even the past two weeks it's been really difficult, because the distance feels a lot more than it is. We know we're going to get through it - the whole reason I'm at uni is so that I can get a job and we can support a family! - but I hope I'm ok to post in here... I think having somewhere to rant about the distance will help

It's really upsetting that my boyfriend isn't fussed about the last time we're going to see each other. It really hurts.

I can vouch for this, with my girlfriend I tried to hold back the emotion till the day I had to say goodbye and the tears came flooding. Have to try so hard to be brave, so as to reassure her and make sure she sees that if I am strong she can be too. Guess a balance is needed between being strong and showing emotion, but don't doubt that he'll be having mixed emotions.

I am doing exactly the same CupcakeFaerie :\

Ahh it's really hard though! Cause texting is just not the same as seeing someone face to face Had a really nice skype session the other day and we spoke loads about missing each other and how we can get through this, and how its not long before we see each other again Only problem is he only does this through skype or when we're seeing each other. I never know how he's feeling through text And we only skype about once or twice a week >.<

Hope you're feeling ok though x

Hello everyone! I've been on this thread before and my LDR relationship didn't work out so I was hoping that I wouldn't be back on here, but alas, I stupidly fell in love with a royal marine.

We've been together for just over a year and things have been great - I was at uni last year nearby where he was based and we spent pretty much every weekend together, plus whenever he got leave.

However, 3 weeks ago he was deployed to Afghanistan for a seven month tour. I knew about it the whole time we were dating but I really didn't anticipate how hard it would be. Not only is it long distance, but the times we can contact each other and by what means are so limited. I send him a letter every day and he calls me once or twice a week but that's it. It's horrible.

Also, I am going back for my second year of uni tomorrow and I am dreading it. I associate that place with him as we spent a lot of time there together. Plus, the people I am living with are very bitchy girls who I fell out with over the summer so am not particularly looking forward to going back. Also, I am worried about leaving my family as they have been vital the last couple of weeks getting me through adjusting to him being gone. So I am very nervous and scared about going back to uni.

And in addition to all of this, he may be killed at any minute! I know that it's still very unlikely and in most cases the troops return home unscathed but I know that he is in the most dangerous place out there and its easy to think the worse and so many what ifs.

I will scour this thread to see if I can find some similar experiences but otherwise any advice is welcome! I just feel very lost right now and a bit hopeless. How do people cope with something like this?


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If someone is kind enough to not object to an uncontrolled rant, I really would like to talk to someone about what's going on with my LDR. Is there a possibility that I could PM someone?

Me?

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Thank you so much - I'm just writing it now.

I've replied

If someone is kind enough to not object to an uncontrolled rant, I really would like to talk to someone about what's going on with my LDR. Is there a possibility that I could PM someone?