Is it wrong to finish a girl because she&#x27;s getting too fat?

No. If it bothered her that much she would have lost the weight. Unless she was a normal weight and you just bullied her or something.

Simply put, if you make an effort with your weight is it too much to ask that you expect your partner to do the same a little?

If she stopped finding you attractive she would probably dump you if you refused to change, so not too harsh IMO.

Reply 2

AlexanderStuart

OP

2

No she literally got huge, she was never ultra skinny to begin with but she just seemed to balloon, anyway an ex-mate of mine thought he'd spite her and tell her and now her and all her mates are giving me ****!

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Reply 3

xoxAngel_Kxox

21

If you don't find her attractive anymore, it's not something you can force. As somebody who was on the other side of this scenario, I know that it's not nice to be with somebody who doesn't seem to care about themselves- and I felt guilty that my boyfriend stuck it out for so long.

Maybe don't end it right away, just say what you're thinking. But try and put it as tactfully as possible. There's no easy way to say it though.

Reply 4

Original post by AlexanderStuart

No she literally got huge, she was never ultra skinny to begin with but she just seemed to balloon, anyway an ex-mate of mine thought he'd spite her and tell her and now her and all her mates are giving me ****!

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They sound like losers. If she gets fat don't tell her to lose weight, just be like "oh babes your beautiful what a horrible boyfriend". If you can't tell I can relate to your experience :tongue:

Reply 5

AlexanderStuart

OP

2

[QUOTE=Mourinho

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I know a bit of tough love is what she needs!!

Reply 6

DeadGirlsDance

17

The title makes it sound like you killed her :tongue:

.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 7

Ice Constricter

If you're not attracted to her anymore, what can you do?

And inb4 Jimbo1234 screams "dump that fatty dump that fatty".

Reply 8

kat91s

11

In my opinion, it's worse to stay with someone even though you don't find them attractive.

It was one of the reasons I broke up with a past boyfriend. It grossed me out during sex too, and who wants that? In a relationship you should be attracted and excited about who you're with.

Reply 9

Original post by AlexanderStuart

[QUOTE=Mourinho I know it's hilarious, a bit of tough love is what she needs!!

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Some people may say you were harsh but ask them this; would they go out with a girl who they didn't find attractive? I mean if she could not help the problem (medical problem, depression or whatever) I would try and be supportive and not dump her. But failing that you aren't asking anything from her. Your just asking her not to do something-not much effort in that!

For me, if I am prepared to spend hours a week working out I expect a girl to at least have some care in what she looks like. I don't care if they are a little overweight, but too much no. Like I said, if she didn't want to lose you then she could change easy.

As for her friends giving you hassle, it sounds they are just angry that you could do better :tongue:

Reply 10

Aries1992

13

I would be hurt if it was me but I know it would be my fault. Too be honest, if the only problem was her weight I would have preferred you to tell me so I could loose it. Although everyone's right, you didn't sign up to the relationship when she was fat so I understand. It's not shallow, some people value attraction more than personality vice versa.

This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

Reply 11

Ice Constricter

And OP, how is she giving you grief? Examples?

Reply 12

on-acid

5

If you're not attracted to them anymore then it's only natural for you to break up. I would hate for my boyfriend to 'force' himself to stay with me, and vice versa.

Reply 13

linney

13

If I was the girl I would be horribly embarrassed and probably not understand. This is irrational though and an emotional response.

However, as an outsider, if you no longer found her attractive then of course it is natural to break up. Perhaps if it was a longer relationship (5+ years) then it would be different as I'd imagine your emotional connection would be stronger than a physical one, but otherwise, it doesn't seem that wrong.

Reply 14

llessur123

9

It's fine. Once you become unattracted to someone then there is little you can do. Although you probably should have told her that she was gaining weight before you ended it as she probably could have lost it relatively quickly and saved a relationship, although most people don't take it well.

Reply 15

ZRO

Original post by Ice Constricter

If you're not attracted to her anymore, what can you do?

And inb4 Jimbo1234 screams "dump that fatty dump that fatty".

Who is this jimbo guy lol? I've seen his name mentioned a few times :ninja:

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Reply 16

Original post by ZRO

Who is this jimbo guy lol? I've seen his name mentioned a few times :ninja:

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A man unafraid to speak his mind. In the process he has the largest collection of red gems in recent TSR history amongst unbanned users. According to himself he starts threads in areas with growing problems such as females with "princess syndrome" and overweight people.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 17

jreid1994

10

Jimbob1234? but he's not a troll, really if you think about it princess syndrome does exist, how many rich girls would actually marry a poor man?
Don't tell me more than how many rich guys would marry a poor girl. That's just delirious. The reason behind this is because girls want guys with power, guys want girls who look good, both as bad as eachother, really, being rich in a capitalist society means being powerful, don't try telling me otherwise, you would make yourself look stupid. If I was to mentioned to a girl I was a ceo I would sound taller to her already, if I mentioned I was a sales assistant for Tesco shed image a short, probably fat guy.

As for aesthetic problems, obesity is a massive issue, do you think that heart attacks becomimg common and having to buy bigger ambulances are good for the economy? Because in America there are ambulances that are specifical ly designed for people weighing over thirty stone, the cost: $100,000 330% the cost of a normal ambulance: $30,000

He is a troll because he has a opinion? He may be very biased, but his opinion does have a glint of truth in it.

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(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 18

AlexanderStuart

OP

2

Original post by Ice Constricter

And OP, how is she giving you grief? Examples?

We split over the summer but I just did the whole 'it's not you it's me' so I wouldn't hurt her feelings, but confided in a mate about the whole thing.

My mate sort of ****ed me off around September/October and then told one of her friends over Christmas, so now I'm getting sly texts off her like "you're not that hot yourself hun" and all this, quite hilarious really. And I bumped into one of her friends in town and I'm "out of order" apparently.

Reply 19

Ice Constricter