Ask a Transwoman!
Mod Edit: Please keep the conversation on topic and keep it civil. No spamming; no insulting; no attacks. Please read through the thread to see if your question has already been asked.
Right.. - over the past few days/weeks even, its became quite clear, through many different threads - that the public's general knowledge of trans issues, is quite lacking..
This is of course, very understandable.. there are so few of us - its rare to know one of us.. but its a problem that can fairly easily be changed
I'm always more then encouraged by peoples want, and desire to educate themselves on these issues. The amount of times that I meet an individual, where I am the first trans person they have ever met - and all they want to do is ask questions. They are not trying to be rude, or insulting.. its just not something they know about, and its something which can be quite interesting.
I am of the opinion that the acceptance of trans people by society, directly correlates with the general public's knowledge and awareness of trans issues... once people understand the situation, how it works, why it happens etc.. - they are usually very tolerant and understanding..
So that brings us to this thread.
An open free space, where you can ask me, what ever you like(within reason) - and I will do my best, to try and answer it...
hopefully through this, some of you, can gain a slightly better understanding of this, and other gender minorities... so that next time you see one on the street, you meet one at work etc. - you will know what they are, what they are going through, and how to treat them - instead of the usual 'oh my god, a she-male' - type thoughts..
so, ask away...
(By request, there are some pictures on post #84 http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2230088&page=5&p=41531944#post41531944 )
Brief explanation of our current thinking of 'gender'
[video="youtube;NRcPXtqdKjE"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRcPXtqdKjE&feature=youtu.be[/video]
Right.. - over the past few days/weeks even, its became quite clear, through many different threads - that the public's general knowledge of trans issues, is quite lacking..
This is of course, very understandable.. there are so few of us - its rare to know one of us.. but its a problem that can fairly easily be changed
I'm always more then encouraged by peoples want, and desire to educate themselves on these issues. The amount of times that I meet an individual, where I am the first trans person they have ever met - and all they want to do is ask questions. They are not trying to be rude, or insulting.. its just not something they know about, and its something which can be quite interesting.
I am of the opinion that the acceptance of trans people by society, directly correlates with the general public's knowledge and awareness of trans issues... once people understand the situation, how it works, why it happens etc.. - they are usually very tolerant and understanding..
So that brings us to this thread.
An open free space, where you can ask me, what ever you like(within reason) - and I will do my best, to try and answer it...
hopefully through this, some of you, can gain a slightly better understanding of this, and other gender minorities... so that next time you see one on the street, you meet one at work etc. - you will know what they are, what they are going through, and how to treat them
- instead of the usual 'oh my god, a she-male' - type thoughts.. so, ask away...
(By request, there are some pictures on post #84 http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2230088&page=5&p=41531944#post41531944 )
Brief explanation of our current thinking of 'gender'
[video="youtube;NRcPXtqdKjE"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRcPXtqdKjE&feature=youtu.be[/video]
(edited 10 years ago)
Scroll to see replies
can a mod move this to society?
not sure its really in the correct place in health.. - as it was more geared to/about society
not sure its really in the correct place in health.. - as it was more geared to/about society
Original post by fallen_acorns
*mods - please move to appropriate location, if this is wrong*
Right.. - over the past few days/weeks even, its became quite clear, through many different threads - that the public's general knowledge of trans issues, is quite lacking..
This is of course, very understandable.. there are so few of us - its rare to know one of us.. but its a problem that can fairly easily be changed
I'm always more then encouraged by peoples want, and desire to educate themselves on these issues. The amount of times that I meet an individual, where I am the first trans person they have ever met - and all they want to do is ask questions. They are not trying to be rude, or insulting.. its just not something they know about, and its something which can be quite interesting.
I am of the opinion that the acceptance of trans people by society, directly correlates with the general public's knowledge and awareness of trans issues... once people understand the situation, how it works, why it happens etc.. - they are usually very tolerant and understanding..
So that brings us to this thread.
An open free space, where you can ask me, what ever you like(within reason) - and I will do my best, to try and answer it...
hopefully through this, some of you, can gain a slightly better understanding of this, and other gender minorities... so that next time you see one on the street, you meet one at work etc. - you will know what they are, what they are going through, and how to treat them - instead of the usual 'oh my god, a she-male' - type thoughts..
so, ask away...
Right.. - over the past few days/weeks even, its became quite clear, through many different threads - that the public's general knowledge of trans issues, is quite lacking..
This is of course, very understandable.. there are so few of us - its rare to know one of us.. but its a problem that can fairly easily be changed
I'm always more then encouraged by peoples want, and desire to educate themselves on these issues. The amount of times that I meet an individual, where I am the first trans person they have ever met - and all they want to do is ask questions. They are not trying to be rude, or insulting.. its just not something they know about, and its something which can be quite interesting.
I am of the opinion that the acceptance of trans people by society, directly correlates with the general public's knowledge and awareness of trans issues... once people understand the situation, how it works, why it happens etc.. - they are usually very tolerant and understanding..
So that brings us to this thread.
An open free space, where you can ask me, what ever you like(within reason) - and I will do my best, to try and answer it...
hopefully through this, some of you, can gain a slightly better understanding of this, and other gender minorities... so that next time you see one on the street, you meet one at work etc. - you will know what they are, what they are going through, and how to treat them
- instead of the usual 'oh my god, a she-male' - type thoughts.. so, ask away...
If you are pre-op, do you experience gender dysphoria? If so, what sort of symptoms are experienced? Do you ever think about mutilation?
Original post by Enigmatic Spirit
If you are pre-op, do you experience gender dysphoria? If so, what sort of symptoms are experienced? Do you ever think about mutilation?
oh hey
thought this thread had rather died.. but nice to get a question
Yes, would be simple answer to the first part.
Dyshporia is horrible, but its very hard to get many people to empathise with, as its a feeling so alien to most. Having your own body, something thats usually so personal to a person, be the thing causing them so so much pain, is very hard. For me it manifests in feelings of intense sadness, hatred, hopeless-ness, and pain - over what I am, what I should have been, the life I should have been able to live, And the life I will now have to live. - Its very much best avoided, and to be honest, the only way its possible to lead a 'normal' life, is to forget who and what I am.. something which takes fairly constant effort.
Do I think about Mutilation? - yes, I have.. would I ever do it? No..
It would ruin the one chance I have of one day bieng normal, and as a person with a history of self-harm, I know very well the ramifications of ijuring yourself, and how it destroys lives.. so.. - quite simple, yes, as a thought its came before.. but no, I would never consider actually doing it.
Lily x
What is the difference between transwoman and transsexual woman?
If you google trans woman you get a wikipdia entry saying the two are different and that a trans woman is a transgender with a female identity. But if you click on the transgender link you get 6 different transgender identities, one of which is transsexual but none of which is trans woman/man:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender#Transgender_identities
As far as I can make out transsexual is you are born with a penis but want a vagina (and vice versa).
If you google trans woman you get a wikipdia entry saying the two are different and that a trans woman is a transgender with a female identity. But if you click on the transgender link you get 6 different transgender identities, one of which is transsexual but none of which is trans woman/man:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender#Transgender_identities
As far as I can make out transsexual is you are born with a penis but want a vagina (and vice versa).
Original post by danny111
What is the difference between transwoman and transsexual woman?
If you google trans woman you get a wikipdia entry saying the two are different and that a trans woman is a transgender with a female identity. But if you click on the transgender link you get 6 different transgender identities, one of which is transsexual but none of which is trans woman/man:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender#Transgender_identities
As far as I can make out transsexual is you are born with a penis but want a vagina (and vice versa).
If you google trans woman you get a wikipdia entry saying the two are different and that a trans woman is a transgender with a female identity. But if you click on the transgender link you get 6 different transgender identities, one of which is transsexual but none of which is trans woman/man:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender#Transgender_identities
As far as I can make out transsexual is you are born with a penis but want a vagina (and vice versa).
It can get quite confusing.. and thats mainly because there isn't one set term/idea, even within the LGBT community, there is arguments over terms/names.
Il try and make my understanding,(and one which is commonly used by LGBT communities in the UK) as clear as possible:
Trans* - Umbrella term for many gender minorities, inclusive of most things.
Transsexual - Someone who is in the wrong phyiscal body, your sex is wrong etc - and you wish to medically transition.
Transgender - someone whose gender is other then what it was assigned at birth, may or may not want to transition medically (though by and large, they do)
The difference between transsexual and transgender though - is confusing. The term transgender was created as 'transsexual' had quite negative medical connotations, and also - stupidly - in the US, they wanted a word which didnt contain 'sex'.
Transgender is the polite term to use these days, but ofcourse the vast majority of transgender people, are also transsexual - and wish to transition medically..
Transsexualism, is how its refered to by medical proffesionals, - or GD (gender dyshporia) - or GID (gender Idenity disorder)
So to answer your question: a transwoman is usually the same as a transsexual woman - however not always, and it can mean other things.
Confusing eh? :P
I always get confused when people say 'transsexual man' or transsexual woman' - is that the sex they feel like they should be, or the sex they were born with? (Excuse my rubbish terminology there)
Also, when people say they're 'gay transsexual/transgender', does that mean that they're gay in their original sex or in their identified gender.
EG a 'gay MTF transsexual' - do they like women or men?
ETA: Not sure why I've been negged for this, I'm trying to learn about something I don't know much about.
Also, when people say they're 'gay transsexual/transgender', does that mean that they're gay in their original sex or in their identified gender.
EG a 'gay MTF transsexual' - do they like women or men?
ETA: Not sure why I've been negged for this, I'm trying to learn about something I don't know much about.
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by RibenaRockstar
I always get confused when people say 'transsexual man' or transsexual woman' - is that the sex they feel like they should be, or the sex they were born with? (Excuse my rubbish terminology there)
Also, when people say they're 'gay transsexual/transgender', does that mean that they're gay in their original sex or in their identified gender.
EG a 'gay MTF transsexual' - do they like women or men?
Also, when people say they're 'gay transsexual/transgender', does that mean that they're gay in their original sex or in their identified gender.
EG a 'gay MTF transsexual' - do they like women or men?
Hi
Transsexual man, or trans man - refers to a female-to-male individual,
The man, refers to what there gender is, not the sex they were born...
(this can be confusing for people at first..)
(vice versa, with trans women)
+ a gay trans man, would date men
- there sexuality is based on their gender/idenity, not their birth sex. In your exsample, a gay MTF transsexual - would be a lesbian transwoman, - and would only date women
x
Original post by AndrewD95
what gender public toilet do you use?
female.
Or disabled/child changing - if its late at night, and I dont feel safe in the female ones.
havent been in a male toilet in a year or so..
Original post by Ilyas
what are the main differences between a normal female and a trans female down there? e.g. do you urinate the same? is the new vagina very similar to a normal vagina? etc.
those are some of the things that fascinate me.
those are some of the things that fascinate me.
ok, Il put a warning here - that im going to get into sexual/medical things, so dont carry on reading if you dont want to know the answer to his question
Post-surgery, the differences are as such: (though it depends on the person, and what they had originally/what sugeon they go with)
- asthetically, if they are done by a good surgeon, will look near perfect. these days surgery is so good, just by looking, its near impossible to tell...
- they dont self lubricate. Unlike a regular vagina, under arousal they dont self-lubricate, which means lubricaiton is always required for sex
- size, depends on the male genitelia that came before, so can vary in size quite alot.
- sensitivity, similar sensitivty to male genitelia (as they are made with the same nerve endings) - so will create the same level of plesure, not quite as high as a normal womans..
- Urination is exactly the same
- ofcourse, and I shoudlnt need to say this, they have no reproductive function..
- dialation is required, less and less as life goes on, but they are required to be self dialeted frequently, to keep it from healing over, as the body natrually wants to do..
--- thats about all I can think of, off the top of my head..
What would you do if you ever dated outside of the LGBT community and they assumed your birth gender was female and you didn't get the chance to tell them until later on? As a matter of fact, would you date a straight guy if they were accepting (and if you're straight)?
Original post by H0ls
How did you realise that you identify more as a woman than a man? Was it always prevalent growing up, as you often see cases on the news now of very young children adamant they're a different gender, or was it not until later in life?
oo, well it differes for everyone - some realise very young (more and more common)
most relise in their teen years,
and some very late in adulthood..
-- I fall into the middle one.. the realisation first happened when I was around 14-15. First just small thoughts - and later the fact that I wasnt normal/regular, the same as the other boys etc..
however these thoughts were always pushed down/suprsessed.. - i found little ways to get through the days: I had long hair, dressed quite femine, had female friends etc. etc. - and that+ constantly ignoring the thoughts, allowed me to live fairly normally... not happily, but normally..
But for all trans people, who try and ignore it - it comes to a point in your life where you cant. For me that was at the age of 20.. a year and a half ago. when it was no longer possible just to ignore it, it was making my life an absolute missery, I was falling deeply into deprsesion, and droping away from society..
Lukily then, thanks to those around me at the time, I was able to tell people - and slowly, over the past year, ive re-built my life, into that of a reasonalby normal person
To the point where now, Im leading a fairly normal female life, Talking and raising awarenss for trans issues, and even running my own anti-bullying buisness
I wish I had acted on it sooner.. how much better my life could have been, if I had acted on this, at age 15 - instead of 20.. isnt worth thinking about
- at the same time though, I feel very fortunate to live in a society, where I can easily do things now.. Compared to some of the older transwomen I know, transitioning at 50-60 etc... who just couldnt do this whne they were my age, and had to miss such a great part of their female lives..Original post by und3niable_
What would you do if you ever dated outside of the LGBT community and they assumed your birth gender was female and you didn't get the chance to tell them until later on? As a matter of fact, would you date a straight guy if they were accepting (and if you're straight)?
Well, it would never happen to me
- sadly, I look trans.. and ugly as **** but hypothetically.. if I looked good enough to convince anyone.. - then I still feel like it would be something I would be completly open with, and talk about with.. - this is a huge part of my life, and my history.. hiding it from someone would not be fair, to both of us.
So if they didnt already know, I would tell them straight away.
(it is a difficult issue though, and different people will have different opinions on when they should tell people.. there have been whole threads on here, arguing this..)
For the second.. would I date a straight guy?
yeah.. If they wanted to date me, and didnt care about me being trans.. - sure
Original post by fallen_acorns
Well, it would never happen to me - sadly, I look trans.. and ugly as ****
but hypothetically.. if I looked good enough to convince anyone.. - then I still feel like it would be something I would be completly open with, and talk about with.. - this is a huge part of my life, and my history.. hiding it from someone would not be fair, to both of us.
So if they didnt already know, I would tell them straight away.
(it is a difficult issue though, and different people will have different opinions on when they should tell people.. there have been whole threads on here, arguing this..)
For the second.. would I date a straight guy?
yeah.. If they wanted to date me, and didnt care about me being trans.. - sure
- sadly, I look trans.. and ugly as **** but hypothetically.. if I looked good enough to convince anyone.. - then I still feel like it would be something I would be completly open with, and talk about with.. - this is a huge part of my life, and my history.. hiding it from someone would not be fair, to both of us.
So if they didnt already know, I would tell them straight away.
(it is a difficult issue though, and different people will have different opinions on when they should tell people.. there have been whole threads on here, arguing this..)
For the second.. would I date a straight guy?
yeah.. If they wanted to date me, and didnt care about me being trans.. - sure
Re: Bold I doubt it. And yeah I guess it depends on the person
Original post by fallen_acorns
Well, it would never happen to me - sadly, I look trans.. and ugly as ****
but hypothetically.. if I looked good enough to convince anyone.. - then I still feel like it would be something I would be completly open with, and talk about with.. - this is a huge part of my life, and my history.. hiding it from someone would not be fair, to both of us.
So if they didnt already know, I would tell them straight away.
(it is a difficult issue though, and different people will have different opinions on when they should tell people.. there have been whole threads on here, arguing this..)
For the second.. would I date a straight guy?
yeah.. If they wanted to date me, and didnt care about me being trans.. - sure
- sadly, I look trans.. and ugly as **** but hypothetically.. if I looked good enough to convince anyone.. - then I still feel like it would be something I would be completly open with, and talk about with.. - this is a huge part of my life, and my history.. hiding it from someone would not be fair, to both of us.
So if they didnt already know, I would tell them straight away.
(it is a difficult issue though, and different people will have different opinions on when they should tell people.. there have been whole threads on here, arguing this..)
For the second.. would I date a straight guy?
yeah.. If they wanted to date me, and didnt care about me being trans.. - sure
Three questions, 1) did you have any thoughts before puberty that made you wonder if you wanted to be female?
2) about gender dysphoria, was there clear signs socially? That you were obviously assigned the wrong sex? gender is I believe neuroligally assigned.
3) how many surgical procedures do you go through?
Sorry if I sound a little blunt
Posted from TSR Mobile
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by jreid1994
Three questions, 1) did you have any thoughts before puberty that made you wonder if you wanted to be female?
2) about gender dysphoria, was there clear signs socially? That you were obviously assigned the wrong sex? gender is I believe neuroligally assigned.
3) how many surgical procedures do you go through?
Sorry if I sound a little blunt
Posted from TSR Mobile
2) about gender dysphoria, was there clear signs socially? That you were obviously assigned the wrong sex? gender is I believe neuroligally assigned.
3) how many surgical procedures do you go through?
Sorry if I sound a little blunt
Posted from TSR Mobile
1) for me personally, no. I dont remember ever thinking about it before puberty.
2) what do you mean by clear signs socially? - not quite sure what you are asking here..
3) Depends on the trans person, and what they want
- the NHS (for transwomen) will only cover Lower sugery, which is just 1 sugery.. (and top sugery if hormones are not effective) - so thats a possible 2.. however some transwomen will have many more, including Facial-recongstruction-sugery, to make their face more feminine.. more top sugery, other parts of plastic sugery etc.. Surgery for trans men, is much more complicated, and lower sugery alone, can take multiple procedures.. - and top (chest) sugery for most is nessasery, so that could be a much higher number..
Original post by fallen_acorns
1) for me personally, no. I dont remember ever thinking about it before puberty.
2) what do you mean by clear signs socially? - not quite sure what you are asking here..
3) Depends on the trans person, and what they want - the NHS (for transwomen) will only cover Lower sugery, which is just 1 sugery.. (and top sugery if hormones are not effective) - so thats a possible 2.. however some transwomen will have many more, including Facial-recongstruction-sugery, to make their face more feminine.. more top sugery, other parts of plastic sugery etc..
Surgery for trans men, is much more complicated, and lower sugery alone, can take multiple procedures.. - and top (chest) sugery for most is nessasery, so that could be a much higher number..
2) what do you mean by clear signs socially? - not quite sure what you are asking here..
3) Depends on the trans person, and what they want
- the NHS (for transwomen) will only cover Lower sugery, which is just 1 sugery.. (and top sugery if hormones are not effective) - so thats a possible 2.. however some transwomen will have many more, including Facial-recongstruction-sugery, to make their face more feminine.. more top sugery, other parts of plastic sugery etc.. Surgery for trans men, is much more complicated, and lower sugery alone, can take multiple procedures.. - and top (chest) sugery for most is nessasery, so that could be a much higher number..
1) ah okay
I was just wondering, it's just I was thinking the earlier it's spotted the more effective it becomes surgically and hormone treatment. 2) like social things, like being attracted to someone, wanting to do feminine things... Ect
3) oh, so there is multiple surgery processes to cover. Makes sense.
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