I'm so uptight around guys in bed

How will I ever lose my virginity?

I'm 24.

I have had one long term bf and one "fling" minus the sex.

I can't let go, talk dirty, start screaming, be forward, etc etc

It makes me feel shy and embarrassed.

I don't even want to take my top off.

I know I am pretty so I don't know why I hold back so much.

No guy will want to be with me long term at this rate :frown:

Reply 1

SannaS

Woman no one is forcing you! Your not ready!!!

Booze helps.

Original post by Anonymous

No guy will want to be with me long term at this rate :frown:

Don't worry about it. Most people are nervous and have insecurities when it comes to intamcy and sex, especially when relationships are new. Just take your time until you feel comfortable and build some trust with a partner. :smile:

Reply 4

RichyFrench

If you don't feel comfortable in bed with the guy, he's obviously not right for you. When you find someone you like, who likes you back, it'll feel natural and you'll just go with it. Seriously don't worry about it, because if you keep thinking it's a massive problem, it will become bigger than it is, and a lot more difficult to deal with.

Reply 5

GenialGermanGent

Original post by SannaS

Your not ready!!!

If someone's "not ready" at 24, something's wrong...

OP, see a sexual therapist.

Reply 6

Michaelj

Original post by TitanicTeutonicPhil

If someone's "not ready" at 24, something's wrong...

OP, see a sexual therapist.

Agreed, this is a psychological problem and/or anxiety problem imo. Especially if she's as 'pretty' as she claims.

Reply 7

dendodge

Don't worry about it. Everyone's nervous before their first time (guys don't like to admit to it, though, so we hide it better).

If you don't feel ready, then don't feel like you "should" or "have to" do anything. Nobody should pressure you into it, and the right person will be happy to wait until you are ready. I'm sure you feel like you're being silly or uptight or whatever, but you're really not. Losing your virginity often seems like a big deal (it's not, but it seems like one), and it's totally normal to not feel ready for it.

Of course, it could also be linked to an anxiety disorder. If you feel like there's something wrong, you should consider seeing a specialist.

Reply 8

pandabird

You're not a Virgo by any chance are you? :tongue:

Some people are a bit awkward in bed initially, I'm sure it'll get better with practice but you just need to persevere and get past the awkward stage.

Reply 9

Namige

Preaching to the choir sister.

Reply 10

Dragonfly07

Original post by Anonymous

I don't know about anyone else, but none of those things are necessary to have sex.

Reply 11

Serano

Original post by Anonymous

If you're pretty I'm sure a guy would love to date you.. don't think of it as you being bad in bed, think of it as the guy teaching you :wink:

Reply 12

Sassy12

Original post by Namige

Preaching to the choir sister.

This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

Reply 13

anjola

Original post by Dragonfly07

I don't know about anyone else, but none of those things are necessary to have sex.

Totally agree. I think that screaming and all of that is a bit overrated and mostly happens in some of those American teen movies. Most of the houses in the UK have walls made of paper, if you scream...the whole neighbourhood would hear :wink:

Reply 14

Journeyzap

Sex is mostly psychological.

Do you masturbate often? If not, try and make a thing of at least doing it once a day, and each time you do it try and fantasise a bit more, how it would go, what the guy does to you, what you do to the guy- pay attention to your breathing and if you are alone, then you can probably "make a noise".

Basically, the more comfortable you are with yourself, the more comfortable you will be presenting yourself to someone else. You have to realise there is nothing to be ashamed about, and that actually, enjoying sex and being sexual is awesome - and sharing it with someone else you want to share it with is awesome as well. :smile: