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Mental Health Support Society Mk X

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Original post by shaylux
hey there! I'm not a regular, and this is certainly a pretty embarrassing issue for me, but I was wondering if there's anyone around who suffers from dermatillomania and could dish out some tips? I've been up and down with it for the past 4yrs or so, with it being pretty horrendous during my worst ED months. I've 'stopped' several times only to restart during stressful times, and being in the middle of exams I can't stop myself from doing it at least once a day.. I've tried doing my nails up all pretty but hasn't worked so far. I've also considered writing on my arms & legs which might be my next strategy. Either way any tips would be lovely.


heya, having googled what it is, id guess keeping your hands busy would help you massively. a few people have bought a "twiddly" because there really good to fiddle with and keep your hands busy, i swere by mine and a few others on MHSS have bought them cos there so good, look on amazon for "Tangles" it might help massively
Original post by shaylux
hey there! I'm not a regular, and this is certainly a pretty embarrassing issue for me, but I was wondering if there's anyone around who suffers from dermatillomania and could dish out some tips? I've been up and down with it for the past 4yrs or so, with it being pretty horrendous during my worst ED months. I've 'stopped' several times only to restart during stressful times, and being in the middle of exams I can't stop myself from doing it at least once a day.. I've tried doing my nails up all pretty but hasn't worked so far. I've also considered writing on my arms & legs which might be my next strategy. Either way any tips would be lovely.


Hey I don't suffer it and don't really get what it is completely but if it comes around at times of stress relaxation techniques may help. I have a bit of OCD (wiki said they were slightly similar) which comes around when I'm stressed and I found that dealing with the stress has helped reduce it a bit.
Keeping your hands busy like the last person said sounds like a great idea too. If you're getting the urge (if that's how it works) you could try tapping your fingers or picking at a ball of blue tack?

I hope I helped a tiny bit. Good luck :smile:


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Had a slice of pizza today :h: struggled to finish it.. but I managed it in the end... had a quite nice time with the family today :smile:.. just trying not to purge now :/
Reply 1443
Feeling really vulnerable. I've sort of lived in the past today and nothing seems real anymore. I feel as though I'm just reliving things again and I feel really really alone and a bit scared.


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Reply 1444
Original post by 08batee
Feeling really vulnerable. I've sort of lived in the past today and nothing seems real anymore. I feel as though I'm just reliving things again and I feel really really alone and a bit scared.


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I know it's hard for you, but we're all riiiiiight here for you and wish you all the best. You're never truly alone as long as someone on this thread is around hun!! :hugs:
Reply 1445
Original post by IDukem
I know it's hard for you, but we're all riiiiiight here for you and wish you all the best. You're never truly alone as long as someone on this thread is around hun!! :hugs:


Thank you, I really appreciate your support. I know, am just quite scared right now. Hope you're alright :hugs:


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Original post by IDukem
.....


Your inbox is full mister.. so I cannae reply back :redface: :tongue:
Reply 1447
Had a crap evening :sad: Probably stupid and delusional but here goes:

I really want to go on holiday this year. Told my dad around 3 weeks ago and asked him to look at it, but he didn't do that. Now I've showed him what I want and the usual crap comes out. First of all he is going on about it being too expensive. I'm certain we could manage up to £2,500 if we don't get a new car (current one drinks too much petrol although I think there is something wrong with it) and not put laminate flooring upstairs (carpet is 5 years old and still very good compared to the **** some people have, and we don't have visitors that often). Then comes the food, and he is saying that there will be nothing for us to eat as we are Asian. Erm, hello, that is part of what holiday is about, trying something new. I wasn't happy about this and said in my school (majority Asian) most people will happily eat anything from the canteen but I can't and how it is his fault I've been brought up like that. Only to receive a lecture how everyone eats their food and stuff despite living in a different country. And I know there are going to be arguments about what my mum will wear as she is very modest. Then they wouldn't want to go to the evening entertainment which I really want to do, causing more problems.
I want a holiday where I can have a great time that I will remember for my whole life. After all, I'm 18 and a half now and how much longer would it be possible for the whole family to go on holiday together? Or how much longer would I want to go on holiday with them? This is the age where some people start to go on holiday with their mates.

Sorry, blurted it out. Not bothered if it doesn't make sense. No wonder I've turned out so withdrawn and isolated. Negative reinforcement is what I've had for most of my life, and the results show. Spent 10 minutes crying earlier, something that hasn't happened for ages.
Reply 1448
Original post by -FireFlies-
Had a slice of pizza today :h: struggled to finish it.. but I managed it in the end... had a quite nice time with the family today :smile:.. just trying not to purge now :/


Yay well done :smile: !
Reply 1449
God I literally cannot do this. What the **** is going on


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Reply 1450
Original post by avhhs
Had a crap evening :sad: Probably stupid and delusional but here goes:

I really want to go on holiday this year. Told my dad around 3 weeks ago and asked him to look at it, but he didn't do that. Now I've showed him what I want and the usual crap comes out. First of all he is going on about it being too expensive. I'm certain we could manage up to £2,500 if we don't get a new car (current one drinks too much petrol although I think there is something wrong with it) and not put laminate flooring upstairs (carpet is 5 years old and still very good compared to the **** some people have, and we don't have visitors that often). Then comes the food, and he is saying that there will be nothing for us to eat as we are Asian. Erm, hello, that is part of what holiday is about, trying something new. I wasn't happy about this and said in my school (majority Asian) most people will happily eat anything from the canteen but I can't and how it is his fault I've been brought up like that. Only to receive a lecture how everyone eats their food and stuff despite living in a different country. And I know there are going to be arguments about what my mum will wear as she is very modest. Then they wouldn't want to go to the evening entertainment which I really want to do, causing more problems.
I want a holiday where I can have a great time that I will remember for my whole life. After all, I'm 18 and a half now and how much longer would it be possible for the whole family to go on holiday together? Or how much longer would I want to go on holiday with them? This is the age where some people start to go on holiday with their mates.

Sorry, blurted it out. Not bothered if it doesn't make sense. No wonder I've turned out so withdrawn and isolated. Negative reinforcement is what I've had for most of my life, and the results show. Spent 10 minutes crying earlier, something that hasn't happened for ages.


I'm going to be honest, because I'm tired and a bit grumpy and I kind of feel like it. Firstly, given this is MHSS and people actually experience delusions as part of their illness, I hope you realise that what you're saying isn't delusional in the slightest? Delusions are part of serious MH conditions, not about feeling upset about a holiday, and they involve having firm, false beliefs held contrary to all evidence.

Secondly, I think you might be overreacting. Not going on holiday hardly constitutes major suffering - I don't think you can really claim that this sort of thing has caused you serious problems... I think it's kind of ridiculous that you just expect your parents to spend £2500 of their own money on something because you want it. Sure, maybe it would be nice if they did, but they certainly don't have any obligation to. In all honesty, you don't know what your parents can and can't afford. If my parents tell me they can't afford something I accept it because a) I have no idea what they have in their bank accounts and b) even if they're not telling the truth, it's their money! They earned it, and it's pretty much up to them what they do with it, aside from taxes etc.

Just my two cents. Sometimes it's helpful to get perspective, so I hope I don't come across as rude even if it's blunt.
Reply 1451
Original post by asdfgah
I'm going to be honest, because I'm tired and a bit grumpy and I kind of feel like it. Firstly, given this is MHSS and people actually experience delusions as part of their illness, I hope you realise that what you're saying isn't delusional in the slightest? Delusions are part of serious MH conditions, not about feeling upset about a holiday, and they involve having firm, false beliefs held contrary to all evidence.

Secondly, I think you might be overreacting. Not going on holiday hardly constitutes major suffering - I don't think you can really claim that this sort of thing has caused you serious problems... I think it's kind of ridiculous that you just expect your parents to spend £2500 of their own money on something because you want it. Sure, maybe it would be nice if they did, but they certainly don't have any obligation to. In all honesty, you don't know what your parents can and can't afford. If my parents tell me they can't afford something I accept it because a) I have no idea what they have in their bank accounts and b) even if they're not telling the truth, it's their money! They earned it, and it's pretty much up to them what they do with it, aside from taxes etc.

Just my two cents. Sometimes it's helpful to get perspective, so I hope I don't come across as rude even if it's blunt.


So in other words I was being stupid :sad:

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Reply 1452
Original post by avhhs
So in other words I was being stupid :sad:

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I wouldn't say stupid - maybe just expecting a bit much?
Reply 1453
Original post by asdfgah
I wouldn't say stupid - maybe just expecting a bit much?


Maybe about the holiday only. Nothing else.

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Reply 1454
Original post by avhhs
Maybe about the holiday only. Nothing else.

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Mhh I'm not sure really. I know you feel awfully hard done by, but in all honesty from what you've posted it doesn't sound like your parents are THAT awful. I mean the stuff the other day about the car tyres is just another financial thing, where maybe they don't have as much money as you expect them to. And cultural things are tricky, but if they've grown up really ingrained into one culture and you're pretty integrated into a different one it must cause clashes - I don't think that necessarily means that they are bad people or that you have 'suffered' because of them or whatever.
Reply 1455
Original post by asdfgah
Mhh I'm not sure really. I know you feel awfully hard done by, but in all honesty from what you've posted it doesn't sound like your parents are THAT awful. I mean the stuff the other day about the car tyres is just another financial thing, where maybe they don't have as much money as you expect them to. And cultural things are tricky, but if they've grown up really ingrained into one culture and you're pretty integrated into a different one it must cause clashes - I don't think that necessarily means that they are bad people or that you have 'suffered' because of them or whatever.


Don't worry about the financial stuff. Its just everyone I see in school seems to be more well off and I seem to be basing the expectations on that. Been bullied about being poor before. Just being stupid really.

The culture thing is really annoying. Again, most people in school seem to have parents who have grown up here too and have big families. And I've not been given the freedom when growing up because my parents don't trust anyone. See, I'm being stupid again :cry2:

Doesn't sound like much but have been a significant contribution to my depression.

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Reply 1456
Shocked that someone here considers my problems to not be important :eek: :cry:

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Reply 1457
Original post by avhhs
Shocked that someone here considers my problems to not be important :eek: :cry:

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I didn't ever say that, so please don't twist it.

I don't think it's always helpful to be told that everything is everyone else's fault and you're right to be upset about it. Sometimes you need some perspective in order to change your attitude - that's all.
Reply 1458
Original post by asdfgah
I didn't ever say that, so please don't twist it.

I don't think it's always helpful to be told that everything is everyone else's fault and you're right to be upset about it. Sometimes you need some perspective in order to change your attitude - that's all.


I also seem to be having problems with jealousy :sad: and I've grown up with miserable sods. Sums up why I'm like that today.

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Original post by avhhs
Shocked that someone here considers my problems to not be important :eek: :cry:

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I think you're out of line here - asdfgah was giving a valid opinion, and to me what you've posted above just seems like you trying to get an emotional response from people. Nobody is belittling your problems, but when people such as myself have given (hopefully) gentle hints as to when you come across as unreasonable in some way (as all of us are every once in a while) you do have a tendency to ignore it, so I don't blame asdfgah for being blunt.

Sorry to be weighing in here and I don't want you to feel ganged up on, but equally I don't want asdfgah to feel like she's done something wrong.

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