Eating Disorders and life with one - Discussions, Opinions, Advice.
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Original post by YogaQueen
I've struggled with one for the past few years and depression but thought id managed to beat it till 3 months ago when I went back there again and ended up on about 150 cals a day and exercising. I think in the last couple of weeks im feeling better cos i've increased it, but its still actually quite low and i still can't get rid of those nagging feelings as much as I want to.
Seem to struggle so much between me and the voice.
Trying to get better in a year.. maybe im rushing it, who knows.
Seem to struggle so much between me and the voice.
Trying to get better in a year.. maybe im rushing it, who knows.
First off, well done for getting better in the first place!
Second, don't beat yourself up. We are all entitled to relapses, think of how many smokers quit and then 'have a couple at a party'. That doesn't mean they are then back to smoking 20 a day. You're still in control, you've had your 'couple at a party', and you're getting back on track. You said you're increasing it, and I'm so proud of you! The fact you are getting better is great, and it's only natural to get those voices, as Toto has said before - it's something you've battled with a long time, and it wont just vanish like that. But you're making steps in the right directions, so just keep heading that way!
Have you got people to help you? It will probably be a lot easier for you!
I guess, its a bit of a war in me brain i find a lot of time if im honest.
And yea i see a counsellor and psychologist. I almost got put into hospital recently because id just got so ill and was still exercising and I think they worried and told me if it didn't change it would happen. So I am trying, its just difficult not to either eat too much or fall back into having like 200 a day. Guess its just something that will come with time.
Although I am enjoying having more energy so I can do things like yoga, muscle pump and running and not feel like night of the living dead!
And yea i see a counsellor and psychologist. I almost got put into hospital recently because id just got so ill and was still exercising and I think they worried and told me if it didn't change it would happen. So I am trying, its just difficult not to either eat too much or fall back into having like 200 a day. Guess its just something that will come with time.
Although I am enjoying having more energy so I can do things like yoga, muscle pump and running and not feel like night of the living dead!
Thanks everyone. Don't know what I'd do without you! I wish I could move out right now but it's not an option -- my parents fund everything.
Well I went to register with my GP surgery temporarily, which is only down the road... and they said because my mum is with a surgery on the other side of town i'm not allowed to register with them.
The one on the other side of town has said that i'm not in their catchment.
The one on the other side of town has said that i'm not in their catchment.
Original post by YogaQueen
I guess, its a bit of a war in me brain i find a lot of time if im honest.
And yea i see a counsellor and psychologist. I almost got put into hospital recently because id just got so ill and was still exercising and I think they worried and told me if it didn't change it would happen. So I am trying, its just difficult not to either eat too much or fall back into having like 200 a day. Guess its just something that will come with time.
Although I am enjoying having more energy so I can do things like yoga, muscle pump and running and not feel like night of the living dead!
And yea i see a counsellor and psychologist. I almost got put into hospital recently because id just got so ill and was still exercising and I think they worried and told me if it didn't change it would happen. So I am trying, its just difficult not to either eat too much or fall back into having like 200 a day. Guess its just something that will come with time.
Although I am enjoying having more energy so I can do things like yoga, muscle pump and running and not feel like night of the living dead!
You sound good in yourself though, the fact that you're noticing the positives is great - and who doesn't love more energy hey!
Your 'overeat/undereat' tendencies are all you, so if you stay strong and keep battling through, I'm sure in no time you'll get through them! They wont go overnight, and it will no doubt be difficult, but you can do it
Just think of the energy you'll have when you're eating better, the ease of every day living - from walking up a set of stairs to having a family/friends get together. Less panicking about whether you'll be made to eat! And you seem to enjoy working out, it'll be so much nicer when you've got energy, you might even enjoy it more. I know if I go to the gym and I'm tired from having not slept, its a real struggle, whereas if I'm alert and ready to go, it's so much more enjoyable. Maybe that one's just me!Either way, I'm really glad to hear you're getting better. Keep it up chick
Original post by jazzykinks
Having a tough time, not necessarily with an ED but with depression and I know a lot of you guys can sympathise.
Sorry guys. I just want to cry.
Spoiler
Sorry guys. I just want to cry.
Are your friends available to talk to? Would your parents pay for a gym/swimming pool membership? Or maybe go on a bike ride? Sometimes I used to go swimming for the afternoon to get out of my house and to unwind? And if you're looking to lose a bit of weight, two birds one stone! (it's a phrase! don't kill me NSCPA!). It sounds like a bit of a crap position to be in
I really feel for you. Depression is awful when people around you don't seem to understand or care. But I'm sure there's someone you can talk to? Or maybe find something that makes you unwind/happier and go with it! Sometimes I'd feel really unhappy, but then going for a bike ride would take my mind off it and I'd come home feeling a lot happier.Original post by dani_1991 Are your friends available to talk to? Would your parents pay for a gym/swimming pool membership? Or maybe go on a bike ride? Sometimes I used to go swimming for the afternoon to get out of my house and to unwind? And if you're looking to lose a bit of weight, two birds one stone! (it's a phrase! don't kill me NSCPA!).
It sounds like a bit of a crap position to be in I really feel for you. Depression is awful when people around you don't seem to understand or care. But I'm sure there's someone you can talk to? Or maybe find something that makes you unwind/happier and go with it! Sometimes I'd feel really unhappy, but then going for a bike ride would take my mind off it and I'd come home feeling a lot happier.
Are your friends available to talk to? Would your parents pay for a gym/swimming pool membership? Or maybe go on a bike ride? Sometimes I used to go swimming for the afternoon to get out of my house and to unwind? And if you're looking to lose a bit of weight, two birds one stone! (it's a phrase! don't kill me NSCPA!). It sounds like a bit of a crap position to be in
I really feel for you. Depression is awful when people around you don't seem to understand or care. But I'm sure there's someone you can talk to? Or maybe find something that makes you unwind/happier and go with it! Sometimes I'd feel really unhappy, but then going for a bike ride would take my mind off it and I'd come home feeling a lot happier.I already have gym membership but you can't really spend all day there. Unfortunately, I don't have many friends here -- they're mostly all from uni and their hometowns are far away. I just feel a bit empty and sad all the time and I can't seem to stop crying. Mum's already said she's fed up with me, despite this not being my choice. My parents made me come back due to financial reasons. x
Just an update:
On another note, I wrote an article on the Huffington Post about anorexia, which you can read here if you'd like (shameless self promotion
). Writing is a huge passion of mine, so it's been a huge motivation for me to stop any weight loss and carry on going.
So my advice to all of you - find your passion in life that will keep you motivated and keep going. Hobbies, interests, friends. If your ed wins it will steal all of that from you. Don't let it.
Alsoo.. did any of you watch "Don't Call Me Crazy" last night on BBC Three?
Spoiler
On another note, I wrote an article on the Huffington Post about anorexia, which you can read here if you'd like (shameless self promotion
). Writing is a huge passion of mine, so it's been a huge motivation for me to stop any weight loss and carry on going.So my advice to all of you - find your passion in life that will keep you motivated and keep going. Hobbies, interests, friends. If your ed wins it will steal all of that from you. Don't let it.
Alsoo.. did any of you watch "Don't Call Me Crazy" last night on BBC Three?
Original post by jazzykinks
I already have gym membership but you can't really spend all day there. Unfortunately, I don't have many friends here -- they're mostly all from uni and their hometowns are far away. I just feel a bit empty and sad all the time and I can't seem to stop crying. Mum's already said she's fed up with me, despite this not being my choice. My parents made me come back due to financial reasons. x
Well (not that this helps really) we are all here for you 100%. I know Mel and Toto always have the ability to make me smile, and even if they are online friends, friends are friends! And we care about you so don't forget that! If you feel upset, come and post on here! But try and find something that makes you happy. I know it can be really hard to get out of that 'dark' funk, where you just feel like crying all the time. Sometimes, you just need a good cry and to feel sorry for yourself, but it's not healthy all the time, you need to try and pull yourself out. If no one else is around to help, then try doing it yourself. You are, after all, stuck in the prison of your own mind at the moment! You CAN get yourself happy, and keep remembering that. Instead of thinking about how sad you are, try and clutch at the happy things and happy times. Plan things to look forwards to - a sleep over, a trip to see one of your mates far away?, a birthday party you're going to? Little milestones to keep you above water, not drowning. Even if it's just treading water for now, it will do till you're able to stay above water without trying I've found forcing myself to go out and be with other people when I feel like just sitting inside and crying really helpful sometimes when I'm at uni. I find it works in two ways. A) I not want to show my mates that I'm really upset so I pretend I'm not and by doing that I start to actually feel a bit better because I stop wanting to cry b) By being with other people, they cheer me up because I have fun with them.
Maybe try that? Even if it's just hanging out with your mum/dad if your friends arent around? You said your mum doesnt like you being upset, so try and pretend to be happy. You never know, you might start feeling happier?
Original post by dani_1991 Well (not that this helps really) we are all here for you 100%. I know Mel and Toto always have the ability to make me smile, and even if they are online friends, friends are friends! And we care about you so don't forget that! If you feel upset, come and post on here! But try and find something that makes you happy. I know it can be really hard to get out of that 'dark' funk, where you just feel like crying all the time. Sometimes, you just need a good cry and to feel sorry for yourself, but it's not healthy all the time, you need to try and pull yourself out. If no one else is around to help, then try doing it yourself. You are, after all, stuck in the prison of your own mind at the moment! You CAN get yourself happy, and keep remembering that. Instead of thinking about how sad you are, try and clutch at the happy things and happy times. Plan things to look forwards to - a sleep over, a trip to see one of your mates far away?, a birthday party you're going to? Little milestones to keep you above water, not drowning. Even if it's just treading water for now, it will do till you're able to stay above water without trying
I've found forcing myself to go out and be with other people when I feel like just sitting inside and crying really helpful sometimes when I'm at uni. I find it works in two ways. A) I not want to show my mates that I'm really upset so I pretend I'm not and by doing that I start to actually feel a bit better because I stop wanting to cry b) By being with other people, they cheer me up because I have fun with them.
Maybe try that? Even if it's just hanging out with your mum/dad if your friends arent around? You said your mum doesnt like you being upset, so try and pretend to be happy. You never know, you might start feeling happier?
Well (not that this helps really) we are all here for you 100%. I know Mel and Toto always have the ability to make me smile, and even if they are online friends, friends are friends! And we care about you so don't forget that! If you feel upset, come and post on here! But try and find something that makes you happy. I know it can be really hard to get out of that 'dark' funk, where you just feel like crying all the time. Sometimes, you just need a good cry and to feel sorry for yourself, but it's not healthy all the time, you need to try and pull yourself out. If no one else is around to help, then try doing it yourself. You are, after all, stuck in the prison of your own mind at the moment! You CAN get yourself happy, and keep remembering that. Instead of thinking about how sad you are, try and clutch at the happy things and happy times. Plan things to look forwards to - a sleep over, a trip to see one of your mates far away?, a birthday party you're going to? Little milestones to keep you above water, not drowning. Even if it's just treading water for now, it will do till you're able to stay above water without trying I've found forcing myself to go out and be with other people when I feel like just sitting inside and crying really helpful sometimes when I'm at uni. I find it works in two ways. A) I not want to show my mates that I'm really upset so I pretend I'm not and by doing that I start to actually feel a bit better because I stop wanting to cry b) By being with other people, they cheer me up because I have fun with them.
Maybe try that? Even if it's just hanging out with your mum/dad if your friends arent around? You said your mum doesnt like you being upset, so try and pretend to be happy. You never know, you might start feeling happier?
N'aw, this warmed my heart.
Friends, online friends. But yes, I back up this point; it's difficult due to everyone going their own separate ways with Uni, work, relationships etc so I take friendship with both hands in whatever form it's offered. We can all feel lonely at times at that really does make us vulnerable in terms of negative thoughts and depression but you can only count on yourself to snap out of it; unfortunately there's not a hindsight fairy to come and slap us out of our momentary glitches. If you ever feel like you need a chat, I'm sure one of us are never too far away!
Original post by porridgeandrhi
Just an update:
Alsoo.. did any of you watch "Don't Call Me Crazy" last night on BBC Three?
Alsoo.. did any of you watch "Don't Call Me Crazy" last night on BBC Three?
yep. possibly not watching the others.
Original post by .snowflake.
yep. possibly not watching the others.
Agreed. Not sure I liked it too much.
Original post by dani_1991
Agreed. Not sure I liked it too much.
it was ok until Beth got her diary out/ the scene with the diet coke..
Original post by .snowflake.
it was ok until Beth got her diary out/ the scene with the diet coke..
Triggers for ED suffers you think?
I had mixed feelings about the documentary.. but overall I felt like it could be triggering for young people because it kind of made it look superficial and even bordering on appealing (running away, bragging about stuffing pens in your arm). Maybe that's just me.
(edited 10 years ago)
Decided to make myself accountable to you all re: sleep. Noticed a lot of my panic either happen around midnight or in the wee hours and well, that ain't good. I'd probably be better forgetting everything by that time , sit down with a cuppa and a fun book or chill-out music if I can't sleep, or something?
Haven't watched anything ED or MH-related for a long time (not even Supersize v Superskinny) because I don't want to dwell on this anymore. Every time I end up stuck in a rut again it's always because I started turning my attention back on it
Haven't watched anything ED or MH-related for a long time (not even Supersize v Superskinny) because I don't want to dwell on this anymore. Every time I end up stuck in a rut again it's always because I started turning my attention back on it
(edited 10 years ago)
A decaf cuppa and a book work for me
Original post by Riku
Decided to make myself accountable to you all re: sleep. Noticed a lot of my panic either happen around midnight or in the wee hours and well, that ain't good. I'd probably be better forgetting everything by that time , sit down with a cuppa and a fun book or chill-out music if I can't sleep, or something?
Haven't watched anything ED or MH-related for a long time (not even Supersize v Superskinny) because I don't want to dwell on this anymore. Every time I end up stuck in a rut again it's always because I started turning my attention back on it
Haven't watched anything ED or MH-related for a long time (not even Supersize v Superskinny) because I don't want to dwell on this anymore. Every time I end up stuck in a rut again it's always because I started turning my attention back on it
I find sleeping really tricky, always have! I've found listen to music or falling asleep watching something really helpful. Occasionally I still wake up at either 1am or like 3am, and I find watching something or listen to music helps me fall back to sleep most of the time. You could try it!
I'm rarely triggered but found it horribly triggering. Especially when she was sat in front of the Ensure/supplement drink. It just brought back memories...
I almost turned it off at the diary scene (where she logged days she didn't eat), but curiosity kept me watching... It was good and strangely accurate portrayal of an adolescent ward. But still.. triggers.
I almost turned it off at the diary scene (where she logged days she didn't eat), but curiosity kept me watching... It was good and strangely accurate portrayal of an adolescent ward. But still.. triggers.
I have mixed feelings about the documentary... It really hit home because the unit was very similar to the one I was in 2 years go. Made me really miss it tbh... You get really close to the others, and the banter is brilliant at times. The 'safety' is also really comforting... you don't have to think about anything in the "outside world", because you're essentially cut off from it. Found some bits difficult to watch; making the girl drink the calorie drink, the close up on a seeping SI wound ( don't know why they put that in :/ ). Hopefully it will convince the people who still believe in the straight-jacket and padded room stereotype that that's not the case though!
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