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Mental Health Support Society Mk X
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Original post by Sultana
Thanks
I dunno why but am feeling this increasingly urgent need to go. It sounds stupid, especially as I don't believe in any kind of life after death, but I'd like to know where she is now. **** crying like a baby again aha.
Thanks
I dunno why but am feeling this increasingly urgent need to go. It sounds stupid, especially as I don't believe in any kind of life after death, but I'd like to know where she is now. **** crying like a baby again aha.Not stupid at all hun - it's natural when you've lost someone to wanna visit them and spend time at the place where they're buried
PM me if that would help, yeah?
I've started doing quizzes and mental puzzles when i'm slipping into a bad mood, it seems to be working. Anyone else use this technique?
Original post by james1211
I've started doing quizzes and mental puzzles when i'm slipping into a bad mood, it seems to be working. Anyone else use this technique?
I used to do Sudoku to get me to sleep. It worked well at first, except then I actually had a breakthrough and became able to actually do Sudoku. Then it stopped being as effective
Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd
I used to do Sudoku to get me to sleep. It worked well at first, except then I actually had a breakthrough and became able to actually do Sudoku. Then it stopped being as effective
Then it becomes more a time waster and keeps you awake i guess
I've started it because reading books hasn't helped procrastination wise, i get too into them and cant put them down for less then 4 hours a day.
Feel quite low atm. For the past few days really I've been down and I can't talk to anyone or express it. Pushing it in more and more and it's just hurting me inside. Want to do stuff I haven't done for almost 5 months, should have known this would happen. Want to do something 'bad' cos it wouldn't be bad, it would be so so good for me. And it would be so sensible to do it without telling anyone who could stop me. But I don't feel like I'd be ready to until I'd articulated it to someone and I can't do that because expressing emotions isn't ok. I'm so glad I feel like this. It hurts so much but makes so much sense.
Original post by asdfgah
Feel quite low atm. For the past few days really I've been down and I can't talk to anyone or express it. Pushing it in more and more and it's just hurting me inside. Want to do stuff I haven't done for almost 5 months, should have known this would happen. Want to do something 'bad' cos it wouldn't be bad, it would be so so good for me. And it would be so sensible to do it without telling anyone who could stop me. But I don't feel like I'd be ready to until I'd articulated it to someone and I can't do that because expressing emotions isn't ok. I'm so glad I feel like this. It hurts so much but makes so much sense.
I know Chat is a bit impossible right now but you can always send me a private message on Facebook, just blurting out how you're feeling and I'll respond
So I last posted in this thread about a year ago I'd say. For those who can't remember me (don't blame you, I could barely remember posting here until I had a look) about 18 months ago I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. Since then a lot has happened. I started university got checked out by a doctor there in October time, but since then I've been living under the hope that going to university had helped me get the better, because for the first time in a long time I was consistently happy for weeks on end. Now I'm back for summer though, I've come to the realisation that it was a very false hope, and I'm back to where I started. Broke down to my best friend and told her everything (she had some idea about my condition, but no idea that I was as bad as I am) on her BIRTHDAY NIGHT OUT and she's been brilliant despite the whole me ruining her birthday thing.
I thought I could deal with it, but I've come to realise some very deep-rooted things about my psyche that has scared me quite a lot to be honest. It reached a low point today when my mum was a few hours late in coming back from a date, and all I could do was worry and think that something was wrong, to ultimately thinking that something horrible had happened...she came back and the date went really well, but I'm sat here 4/5 hours later and I keep forgetting that everythings ok and am thinking about what I was earlier. It's awful really.
Sorry about the ramble, there's nothing like venting to random people in the internet
I thought I could deal with it, but I've come to realise some very deep-rooted things about my psyche that has scared me quite a lot to be honest. It reached a low point today when my mum was a few hours late in coming back from a date, and all I could do was worry and think that something was wrong, to ultimately thinking that something horrible had happened...she came back and the date went really well, but I'm sat here 4/5 hours later and I keep forgetting that everythings ok and am thinking about what I was earlier. It's awful really.
Sorry about the ramble, there's nothing like venting to random people in the internet
Original post by Ben,
So I last posted in this thread about a year ago I'd say. For those who can't remember me (don't blame you, I could barely remember posting here until I had a look) about 18 months ago I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. Since then a lot has happened. I started university got checked out by a doctor there in October time, but since then I've been living under the hope that going to university had helped me get the better, because for the first time in a long time I was consistently happy for weeks on end. Now I'm back for summer though, I've come to the realisation that it was a very false hope, and I'm back to where I started. Broke down to my best friend and told her everything (she had some idea about my condition, but no idea that I was as bad as I am) on her BIRTHDAY NIGHT OUT and she's been brilliant despite the whole me ruining her birthday thing.
I thought I could deal with it, but I've come to realise some very deep-rooted things about my psyche that has scared me quite a lot to be honest. It reached a low point today when my mum was a few hours late in coming back from a date, and all I could do was worry and think that something was wrong, to ultimately thinking that something horrible had happened...she came back and the date went really well, but I'm sat here 4/5 hours later and I keep forgetting that everythings ok and am thinking about what I was earlier. It's awful really.
Sorry about the ramble, there's nothing like venting to random people in the internet
I thought I could deal with it, but I've come to realise some very deep-rooted things about my psyche that has scared me quite a lot to be honest. It reached a low point today when my mum was a few hours late in coming back from a date, and all I could do was worry and think that something was wrong, to ultimately thinking that something horrible had happened...she came back and the date went really well, but I'm sat here 4/5 hours later and I keep forgetting that everythings ok and am thinking about what I was earlier. It's awful really.
Sorry about the ramble, there's nothing like venting to random people in the internet
A ramble is the best way to get things off your chest, sometimes just knowing someone else has seen what you're concerned about makes it feel slightly better. Your friend sounds extremely understanding about it, i don't think i could say i have many friends who would react as well as she seems to have!
Original post by Kindred
Let's try this again and not leave it blank this time 
My birthday is tomorrow but my party is today so i'm kinda just shuffling my birthday over to today so I get presents and cake at my party :P
Thank you
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My birthday is tomorrow but my party is today so i'm kinda just shuffling my birthday over to today so I get presents and cake at my party :P
Thank you
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happy birthday for tomorrow :3
***
been going between feel extremely low and extremely amazing a lot recently, and mostly too quickly to even attempt to work out why or if I should try tell someone... it's been really exhausting so i've just generally been a bit rubbish and not keeping up with the thread or outside world, oops, sorry.
good vibes and warm wishes to all those who are in need.
Original post by octoberbaby
been going between feel extremely low and extremely amazing a lot recently, and mostly too quickly to even attempt to work out why or if I should try tell someone... it's been really exhausting so i've just generally been a bit rubbish and not keeping up with the thread or outside world, oops, sorry.
good vibes and warm wishes to all those who are in need.
good vibes and warm wishes to all those who are in need.
See thats exactly what i'm having, one morning i'll wake up and feel cheery and as if i was never feeling down at all, then the next morning i'll wake up and feel like i'm utterly depressed. Making it hard to evaluate whether i should see a GP, because when i'm not feeling down i feel a bit silly asking for help!
So frustrating.
Original post by james1211
See thats exactly what i'm having, one morning i'll wake up and feel cheery and as if i was never feeling down at all, then the next morning i'll wake up and feel like i'm utterly depressed. Making it hard to evaluate whether i should see a GP, because when i'm not feeling down i feel a bit silly asking for help!
So frustrating.
So frustrating.
I know that feeling very well, mostly from last year, feeling very low and thinking 'I really HAVE to do something about this' and then by the time I'm getting close to an appointment or work up the courage to ring my GP I'm like actually, you know what, I'm fine. Eventually someone forced me along and was like 'nope, we are sorting this now'. It was most definitely what I needed. Do you have anyone close to you that know what you are struggling with, or do you think you have anyone you could tell? Once she'd made me go to the doctors I was like, you might as well come in with me or I'll end up lying and talking about non-MH stuff.
Tried a million tactics for going to the GP and literally having someone there that called me out whenever I downplayed things was the only thing that came close to working.
I'm a bit drunk I'm not going to lie.
The past few weeks have been pretty awful, it is like a cloak of sadness is hanging over me which I just can't shake. I try and go out with some friends even though I'm riddled with anxiety and don't feel like it and I just feel so uncomfortable and get these un logical feelings that everyone hates me. The brain is such a weird thing
The past few weeks have been pretty awful, it is like a cloak of sadness is hanging over me which I just can't shake. I try and go out with some friends even though I'm riddled with anxiety and don't feel like it and I just feel so uncomfortable and get these un logical feelings that everyone hates me. The brain is such a weird thing
Original post by octoberbaby
I know that feeling very well, mostly from last year, feeling very low and thinking 'I really HAVE to do something about this' and then by the time I'm getting close to an appointment or work up the courage to ring my GP I'm like actually, you know what, I'm fine. Eventually someone forced me along and was like 'nope, we are sorting this now'. It was most definitely what I needed. Do you have anyone close to you that know what you are struggling with, or do you think you have anyone you could tell? Once she'd made me go to the doctors I was like, you might as well come in with me or I'll end up lying and talking about non-MH stuff.
Tried a million tactics for going to the GP and literally having someone there that called me out whenever I downplayed things was the only thing that came close to working.
Tried a million tactics for going to the GP and literally having someone there that called me out whenever I downplayed things was the only thing that came close to working.
I haven't really told anyone, i'm ashamed to make a big deal about it when other people have their own problems. I've always been reactive instead of proactive so i guess i've been waiting till it's got to the point where i have no choice but to take myself into the GP's but i know i should really go now so i can try and make things happen while it's easier to tackle. I don't have a partner i could tell and my friends would most likely not take it seriously so that leaves my parents really, who i guess would be helpful even without seeing a doctor.
Original post by Idle
I'm a bit drunk I'm not going to lie.
The past few weeks have been pretty awful, it is like a cloak of sadness is hanging over me which I just can't shake. I try and go out with some friends even though I'm riddled with anxiety and don't feel like it and I just feel so uncomfortable and get these un logical feelings that everyone hates me. The brain is such a weird thing
The past few weeks have been pretty awful, it is like a cloak of sadness is hanging over me which I just can't shake. I try and go out with some friends even though I'm riddled with anxiety and don't feel like it and I just feel so uncomfortable and get these un logical feelings that everyone hates me. The brain is such a weird thing
When i feel like this i find getting my mates out and all of us trying some kind of new sport works, because i'm so focused on the task itself that my anxiety goes out the window. We've done stuff like indoor climbing before which none of us had ever done and i felt like the pressure to be social and comfortable was lifted because we were all out our comfort zone from being afraid of the height.
May not work for everyone but it's something to think about. Hope you find a way to shake it soon.
Feeling very overwhelmed by feelings currently BUT also feeling quite calm. Its odd. Like the calm before a storm. Im actually quite worried 
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Original post by Idle
I'm a bit drunk I'm not going to lie.
The past few weeks have been pretty awful, it is like a cloak of sadness is hanging over me which I just can't shake. I try and go out with some friends even though I'm riddled with anxiety and don't feel like it and I just feel so uncomfortable and get these un logical feelings that everyone hates me. The brain is such a weird thing
The past few weeks have been pretty awful, it is like a cloak of sadness is hanging over me which I just can't shake. I try and go out with some friends even though I'm riddled with anxiety and don't feel like it and I just feel so uncomfortable and get these un logical feelings that everyone hates me. The brain is such a weird thing
Was feeling like this back in March. Was generally not having a very good time, and I couldn't get out of it... Every time I attempted to go out and distract myself I'd end up in an awful state crying and convinced no one wanted me there to the extent I spent my best friends 18th hid in his pool house playing Solitaire on my phone until my mum could come pick me up :'). There isn't really much I can say apart from that it will pass and I'm sure you aren't hated at all, the fact that you were out with friends proves this even if only a little bit. Perhaps maybe going out with them but not drinking might help the feeling pass? I know that's what I did, because these thoughts were only really coming out when I was drinking. Did any of your friends notice you seemed to be feeling this way?
Original post by james1211
I haven't really told anyone, i'm ashamed to make a big deal about it when other people have their own problems. I've always been reactive instead of proactive so i guess i've been waiting till it's got to the point where i have no choice but to take myself into the GP's but i know i should really go now so i can try and make things happen while it's easier to tackle. I don't have a partner i could tell and my friends would most likely not take it seriously so that leaves my parents really, who i guess would be helpful even without seeing a doctor.
Again a feeling I can definitely empathize with... I was never very good at actively trying to get better myself. If you feel like telling your parents is a viable option then that's great that you're close enough to them, and also they could be the best people to tell and very likely to support you.
Original post by asdfgah
Thanks, yeah things have been much better lately. I'm still depressed but not regularly suicidal anymore, and flashbacks are infrequent atm. 
Yeah, not going over it isn't necessarily the same as not dealing with it, though. Personally I'm of the opinion that you can deal with bullying without "going over" the bullying at all - you can do it indirectly by discussing how other people are giving opinions rather than facts, and by working on self esteem etc. It sounds to me like you did deal with some of those aspects of bullying, so just wanted to point out that stuff can be dealt with without necessarily going over it.
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Yeah, not going over it isn't necessarily the same as not dealing with it, though. Personally I'm of the opinion that you can deal with bullying without "going over" the bullying at all - you can do it indirectly by discussing how other people are giving opinions rather than facts, and by working on self esteem etc. It sounds to me like you did deal with some of those aspects of bullying, so just wanted to point out that stuff can be dealt with without necessarily going over it.
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Well that's at least something. The fact the flashbacks are infrequent at the moment must be such a huge relief and must make things a little easier and you a little more hopeful of recovery.
Uh yeah, I guess I did deal a little with the types of things you've mentioned. It's hard to disagree with anything you've posted about therapy and what I experienced. I also guess my view on dealing with my bullying is a rather one dimensional view and rather narrow minded. I really can't disagree with anything you've said.
Original post by PonchoKid
the bullying is part of my issue, but there are so many factors relating to my depression that bullying is only 1... but ill give anything ago, cant be any worse than my last counsellor. a whole hour talking about how i put shoes on 
my drs taking me off citalopram with a view to taking me off meds completely, but currently im doing worse on a lowered dose than i was before, so who knows...
my drs taking me off citalopram with a view to taking me off meds completely, but currently im doing worse on a lowered dose than i was before, so who knows...
Well if you can get therapy to help deal with 'some' of the parts relating to your depression that should hopefully make the other parts a little easier to deal with and sortout-able. That's only one counsellor/therapist. The one you've experienced sounds rather awful but they won't all be like that.
I'm also abit surprised your GP has the view of taking you off medication completely without at least trying another drug. I found Citalopram to do more harm than good personally, so they switched my medication to another which is like a million times better than Citalopram. I'd of thought they'd have tried another before taking that view.
(edited 10 years ago)
How do you handle being ignored by your best friend?
She's being going through family stuff at the moment so I've given her space but 95% of the time she doesn't reply to my messages or texts. I was totally blunt and asked if I've done something wrong. She said no and I believed her.
It hasn't really got to me because I know she is busy so I think 'I'll just wait till she contacts me' but she never does. I brush it off and just assume she hasn't had time but then I see on Facebook her posting loads on her other friends walls and it's hard not to think about it and feel hurt because it's like I'm blatantly being ignored.
I feel horrible for being so selfish when she is having some issues at home but surely if she can post and have little
conversations with another friend, she can reply to my messages?
I've been home since April after my placement abroad and we have only met up once for like 30 mins when it suited her... that's it.
It just feels like I'm losing my best friend.. one of the very few friends I have
.
On a positive note I am not utterly distraught and thinking it's all my fault, which I am surprised about because that's how I would normally think.
She's being going through family stuff at the moment so I've given her space but 95% of the time she doesn't reply to my messages or texts. I was totally blunt and asked if I've done something wrong. She said no and I believed her.
It hasn't really got to me because I know she is busy so I think 'I'll just wait till she contacts me' but she never does. I brush it off and just assume she hasn't had time but then I see on Facebook her posting loads on her other friends walls and it's hard not to think about it and feel hurt because it's like I'm blatantly being ignored.
I feel horrible for being so selfish when she is having some issues at home but surely if she can post and have little
conversations with another friend, she can reply to my messages?
I've been home since April after my placement abroad and we have only met up once for like 30 mins when it suited her... that's it.
It just feels like I'm losing my best friend.. one of the very few friends I have
. On a positive note I am not utterly distraught and thinking it's all my fault, which I am surprised about because that's how I would normally think.
(edited 10 years ago)
I've turned into the pj wearing, milky tea drinking, blanket covered settee monster. So worried that I won't be able to shake this off by Wednesday and then I'll be stuck trying to fake emotions during summer camp.
Original post by luno Feeling bored all the time is awful. I've been through stuff like that in the past. No matter what I was doing I just didn't care for it.. probably more losing interest than feeling bored though.
What normally interests you? Have you tried doing things you normally enjoy? Or maybe something new?
Thank you. Some sort of not feeling well is expected I suppose!
Why would you say I'm lucky? Because I mentioned how my family are not religious? Nah it's not really the pressure to conform... if that was the case my parents would be a lot more strict with my rebellious brother haha.
I think not being religious is definitely a part of it... but it's mainly how he grew up. He just did what he wanted and my parents weren't that strict with him. But then I can say the same for me and the rest of my family! Haha yeah it's like any other month for him. The only thing different is my sister has refused to drive him to the pub!
Must be tough, especially with a religious family. If someone doesn't fast in my house no one really cares.
Maybe do something on your own? Or with people from college?
Feeling bored all the time is awful. I've been through stuff like that in the past. No matter what I was doing I just didn't care for it.. probably more losing interest than feeling bored though. What normally interests you? Have you tried doing things you normally enjoy? Or maybe something new?
Thank you. Some sort of not feeling well is expected I suppose!
Why would you say I'm lucky? Because I mentioned how my family are not religious? Nah it's not really the pressure to conform... if that was the case my parents would be a lot more strict with my rebellious brother haha.
I think not being religious is definitely a part of it... but it's mainly how he grew up. He just did what he wanted and my parents weren't that strict with him. But then I can say the same for me and the rest of my family! Haha yeah it's like any other month for him. The only thing different is my sister has refused to drive him to the pub!
Must be tough, especially with a religious family. If someone doesn't fast in my house no one really cares. Maybe do something on your own? Or with people from college?
That is my problem too, losing interest and not being able to concentrate. I started watching stuff on iPlayer but within a couple of days I couldn't be bothered to watch anymore because of difficulty concentrating.
They really go against the stereotype then
Some people need to learn that there is more to life than religion, those that put religion above everything else and take all the fun out of life . I guess you are happy with your upbringing? Yeah it is tough. Later on I'll have to pretend to be religious by reading the Quran and praying
. It is 40 days since my uncle died.I do things on my own every now and then, but now I've started getting bored of doing it. I guess I need to find something else then.
Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd
I have skillz when it comes to deleting things! 
I'm OK thanks. Though my sister is cross with me coz she text me an hour ago and I was fast asleep
I'm OK thanks. Though my sister is cross with me coz she text me an hour ago and I was fast asleep
Haha yeah
many many years ago I did the same on Windows 98 when messing around with settings it wasn't connected to the internet so it didn't matter, somehow got it back eventually That's good
don't worry about being asleep 
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(edited 10 years ago)
