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No friends at uni

After having finished my first year at uni, I have to say that although I enjoyed the course, I have not made a single friend at uni. Everytime I go there, I'm mostly invisible. I do have a few conversations with some people sometimes, but never who I really go out with. None of the societies interest me and are mostly asking me to train for national championships (unfortunately I have commitments and can't leave London) or are race/religion based societies. I did decide to go to one event in the Economics society. Everyone was just drinking tons of alcohol and then some of them just left to get high on shisha. I feel that uni is not the best time socially for me. Maybe it's just meeting the wrong people but I feel that I will never will be able to get along with them.

And it's really strange because outside of uni, I never usually struggle to make friends. Maybe I ruined it because I was laughed at before freshers. I don't know - maybe I was not destined to make friends at uni?

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Reply 1
I'm sure it just takes some people longer to make friends than others. Out of curiosity which uni are you currently at?
Reply 2
Original post by ummi1
I'm sure it just takes some people longer to make friends than others. Out of curiosity which uni are you currently at?


QMUL. Really feeling lonely :frown:
Reply 3
What about volunteering or joining sports clubs etc. outside of the university? You won't be under as much pressure and there may even be other students who are members and in the same position as you.
Reply 4
Original post by beccac3
What about volunteering or joining sports clubs etc. outside of the university? You won't be under as much pressure and there may even be other students who are members and in the same position as you.


I could do volunteering (as I had fun when I was doing at school and met people) but not sports clubs. They all require commitments which I can't make :frown:
I have commitments at home.
I won't have any friends at uni either. You are not alone :frown:
Reply 6
Original post by Maid Marian
I won't have any friends at uni either. You are not alone :frown:


Good to see someone else in my position - I'm just really dreading coming back and seeing the classmates again. They will most probably ignore me yet again. I'm sorry I'm not their flatmate. And I'm really sorry that they think me as stupid.
Reply 7
I did make a friend in my summer work experience and he and I both made the effort to get to know each other.

But when it comes to uni, make all the effort and they don't care. Best time of my life, my ass.
You see, that's the problem with QMUL. If it wasn't for me already knowing some people, I wouldn't have had made friends. Ironic, isn't it?
Reply 9
Original post by JulietheCat
You see, that's the problem with QMUL. If it wasn't for me already knowing some people, I wouldn't have had made friends. Ironic, isn't it?


Maybe I'm just in an unlucky environment, with the wrong sort of people. You know, after that horrible event, I have started to resent all my classmates and felt that making effort is just in vain. Everyone is already in their cliques and that's it. It's going to be another two years with those people :sigh:
Original post by Anonymous
Maybe I'm just in an unlucky environment, with the wrong sort of people. You know, after that horrible event, I have started to resent all my classmates and felt that making effort is just in vain. Everyone is already in their cliques and that's it. It's going to be another two years with those people :sigh:


If you resent them all, then why bother? As you said, they will ****ing ignore you. Stupid ****ers - have never met such mean people in my life. Just get your degree and get the **** out.
Reply 11
Original post by JulietheCat
If you resent them all, then why bother? As you said, they will ****ing ignore you. Stupid ****ers - have never met such mean people in my life. Just get your degree and get the **** out.


Yeah and cry all the time. School was SO much better. Even with my stuck up primary school classmates. I'm such in deep **** that I actually miss them. :cry2:
Original post by Anonymous
Yeah and cry all the time. School was SO much better. Even with my stuck up primary school classmates. I'm such in deep **** that I actually miss them. :cry2:


You see. Even they are better than your classmates. Face it - it's reality and you went to the wrong uni. Life's a bitch.
Reply 13
Original post by JulietheCat
You see. Even they are better than your classmates. Face it - it's reality and you went to the wrong uni. Life's a bitch.


But I like the course, support and staff. Just the social side is ****
Reply 14
Original post by Anonymous
Maybe I'm just in an unlucky environment, with the wrong sort of people. You know, after that horrible event, I have started to resent all my classmates and felt that making effort is just in vain. Everyone is already in their cliques and that's it. It's going to be another two years with those people :sigh:


what horrible event?
Reply 15
Original post by JPL9457
what horrible event?


That Economics society event. Big waste of time. Everyone was too busy talking with their little groups, mostly ignoring me even when I tried to make the effort and then some people just left me all alone to get high on shisha. I then decided I was not going to bother with uni events at all anymore. My only hope is ULU society events - at least there is a chance that I can speak to people who I will get along with.
Some people attract friends and people into their lives naturally , others have to make an effort . Sounds to me like your not trying that hard tbh but thats just what it looks like from this angle.
Reply 17
Make friends at a job?
Reply 18
Original post by Jaegon Targaryen
Some people attract friends and people into their lives naturally , others have to make an effort . Sounds to me like your not trying that hard tbh but thats just what it looks like from this angle.


The trouble is that I make all the effort in the world at uni but no-one wants to be friends with me. Then, I went to my summer work experience and the opposite happened. I actually found people who I get along with - problem is that they really live in another country and will be able to only visit me a few times every year in London after this work placement is over. But there was none of this "make the effort anyway cuz but I'm going with my homies because I'm better off with them".
Original post by Anonymous
The trouble is that I make all the effort in the world at uni but no-one wants to be friends with me. Then, I went to my summer work experience and the opposite happened. I actually found people who I get along with - problem is that they really live in another country and will be able to only visit me a few times every year in London after this work placement is over. But there was none of this "make the effort anyway cuz but I'm going with my homies because I'm better off with them".


Well, making friends isn't out of the question - just not at uni? I personally tried my best there too but never made new friends either. Maybe it's just the uni?


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