Kissed/touched another guy but does my boyfriend have to know?

Last weekend I went out with a couple of my friends and got fairly drunk, there was this guy who kept coming up to me/dancing with me and I was kind flirting with him. I ended up getting quite intimate with him, we kissed and touched each other a bit but we NEVER slept together nor did I go back to his. Now my friends have all told me not to say anything to my boyfriend because it meant NOTHING and it is complete out of character for me to do such a thing but I can't cope with it and I feel so guilty because it is so unlike me.

What do you guys think I should do?

I don't want to give too much away in terms of my boyfriend/how long we have been together because I know he goes on this site quite a bit hence why I am anon.

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Reply 1

shezshez

Original post by Anonymous

Honesty is the best policy, how would you feel if he'd have done that to you? Whether you slept with him or not - it's irrelevant.

Original post by kenanandkel

Girls like you make me sick. I got cheated on by my long term girlfriend and it took me a good year to get over it, that year was HELL for me. I have no respect for people like you, he deserves to know the truth and then dump your ass. SLUT.

Slut was a bit harsh, but yeah. Cheaters are the worst.

Reply 2

gumtrees

tell him. Seriously, imagine if he done it to you

Reply 3

zaback21

Original post by Anonymous

Girl this is so not cool.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 4

im so academic

Original post by Anonymous

So because you didn't have sex with him it's all OK? Would you have been happy for your boyfriend to have done the same?

That's pathetic. He deserves better than that, and I hope he finds out (one way or another) and gets rid of you. People shouldn't be treated like that.

Don't play "oh it's so unlike me" bull****. You did it.

Reply 5

IlexBlue

If it was completely out of character for you, you wouldn't have done it. :rolleyes:

Reply 6

Mockery

You should tell him. Usually I don't recommend honesty over such trivial, one off, things that your partner might blow out of proportion, but this isn't trivial. Alcohol being involved doesn't matter, on every night out you will be hounded by guys. If you can't learn how to say no then you shouldn't be in a relationship or you shouldn't go out. If you've done this once you could easily do this again

Reply 7

zaback21

Original post by im so academic

Haha lol !

Reply 8

aspirinpharmacist

Way I see it, you should treat it as bad as if you had slept with this guy, and I think you should definitely tell your boyfriend. Nothing else you can do really, you should be honest though.

Reply 9

FilmNerd1989

Original post by im so academic

I totally agree with this. Don't go acting like a cheap tart, then making out because it was only once it's ok, because it's not.

Reply 10

pinkbullets

If you don't want the guilt to eat you up inside and in all likelihood ruin your relationship anyway, then yes you do have to tell him.

Reply 11

LordVoldemort1

Original post by Anonymous

would u wanna know if he did the same?

Reply 12

Anonymous #2

Would you really have even thought about doing that kind of thing if you were absolutely sure you wanted to be in your relationship?

Reply 13

im so academic

Original post by FilmNerd1989

I totally agree with this. Don't go acting like a cheap tart, then making out because it was only once it's ok, because it's not.

It's disgusting. If that happened to her, she would be all over here crying about it, but because she did it, it's OK?

The fact that she stressed she didn't have sex with him made it worse. So it's OK to get off with someone as long as you don't do the deed?

I may be wrong, but I'm of the belief that if you're in the relationship, you stay faithful with that person.

People these days, they take their partners for granted. If I ever have a boyfriend, I would never do any of this **** and make him feel appreciated.

Disgraceful woman.

Reply 14

Zarek

What a linch mob response these type of posts throw up - you don't even know anything about the relationship. Sure it is not a good thing and you should 'fess up to your boyfriend and take the consequences, whatever they may be. But these things do happen - in my experience men and women can be equally as susceptible. People are fallible in this area with out always being irredeemable. I also think there is a sliding scale of seriousness from thoughts, flirting, kissing, sex, and sometimes demeanours can be forgiven.

Reply 15

FilmNerd1989

Original post by im so academic

Exactly. She should feel thoroughly ashamed of herself and I hope her boyfriend finds out a dumps her. Cheating lowlife skank.

Reply 16

Gorwell

Do what you would want him to do.

Reply 17

dav14

Original post by im so academic

Beautifully put.

I'd would just like to add and emphasise that nobody deserves to be cheated on.

When he looks at you he sees a girl that he probably thinks is amazing and perfect, but really you are just a ****ing liar. You tell him everything and let him decide what to do. Can't believe ur asking random peoples advice rather than tell him.

PS Your friends are cows also.

Reply 18

im so academic

Original post by Zarek

So if your girlfriend did the same thing, it would be OK, right?

If she wasn't happy in her relationship, she still should have shown him some respect by breaking up previously.

Reply 19

im so academic

Original post by FilmNerd1989

Exactly. She should feel thoroughly ashamed of herself and I hope her boyfriend finds out a dumps her. Cheating lowlife skank.

Agreed.

I have no sympathy for the OP. Why would you ruin a relationship by cheating on your boyfriend who's been faithful to you all this time?

You know what? In a way I'm glad this happened sooner or later as now the boyfriend has seen the OP's true colours and get rid as soon as possible.