TSR Non-Drinkers Freshers Thread 2013

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Oh god. I went to a some pub with my flatmates and it was so awkward so I just left. Literally, just came here. I think my flatmates will be looking for me :s But I couldn't find them :s

Why was it awkward? :s-smilie:

I'm sure things will get better as the week progresses :console:

Reply 761

Cryl

Original post by BaconEmperor

Why was it awkward? :s-smilie:

I'm sure things will get better as the week progresses :console:

Well I went out with my flatmates and we took like an hour to get to some lemon groove pub thingy (because originally we couldn't find it). And they already knew each other a bit more as they had arrived early. So we went and ended up sitting in a huge group full of loud talking people and everyone was drinking and having a great time. My flatmates then went away to get a drink but didn't return and I didn't know what to do so I just panicked, loaded up Google Maps on my phone and just walked away. xD It was all so intimidating.

At least my flatmates seem okay and everything isn't that bad. Tbh, I want freshers week to be over now. :tongue:

I just want to study. :c Tell me how your experience goes when you arrive :tongue:

Reply 762

amylia_aelb

Original post by Cryl

I just want to study. :c Tell me how your experience goes when you arrive :tongue:

where abouts are you staying? Im moving into Lafrowda tomorrow :smile:

sorry to hear your first night didnt go to well.

Reply 763

amylia_aelb

Original post by BaconEmperor

That's awesome! So few schools offer Russian. Oh that's right on campus great if you ever wake up late :tongue:

13:45 for me, and you? How are you getting to Exeter out of interest? I live in a nearby city so will be getting a lift which is lucky because I'm taking way too much stuff :colondollar:

I probably would have carried it on but my college didnt offer it! So ive practically forgotton most of it now haha! 16:00 :smile:

coming by car as i live about 3 1/2 hours away. Oh i know im really worried all my stuff isnt going to fit in the car!

Reply 764

Cryl

Original post by amylia_aelb

where abouts are you staying? Im moving into Lafrowda tomorrow :smile:

sorry to hear your first night didnt go to well.

James Owen Court :smile:

and it's fine; hopefully it'll get better :smile:

And Lafrowda is really close to university! Long gaps in the timetable won't be a problem for you!

Reply 765

amylia_aelb

Original post by Cryl

James Owen Court :smile:

and it's fine; hopefully it'll get better :smile:

And Lafrowda is really close to university! Long gaps in the timetable won't be a problem for you!

I know i was really lucky! Where abouts is james owen court? Oh I hope theres someone in my flat whose not into clubbing...

Reply 766

Cryl

Original post by amylia_aelb

I know i was really lucky! Where abouts is james owen court? Oh I hope theres someone in my flat whose not into clubbing...

It's in the city center. Dw, there probably be :smile:

Reply 767

amylia_aelb

Original post by Cryl

It's in the city center. Dw, there probably be :smile:

Ahh ok. Well I just got a message from one of them saying "I hope you like your drink" ...somebody help me! :s-smilie:

Reply 768

Byrks

My Freshers experience so far has been really mixed.

I've been through Freshers before, so I know I don't want to go partying, I know I mustn't (it's counterproductive in the end, since there are inevitably impasses with other people I'm talking with), and I decide not to go. Which is good, that I'm following through with my decision.

Bad thing is, even if that's the case, I feel sort of bad, inadequate, wrong, or something, even though I rationally know it's a perfectly valid choice. Or at least I feel like I'm being judged that way and feel bad (even though I know it would be a wrong judgment). :s-smilie:

Ah well. It's just a couple of weeks. I'll just have to put up with it now. :sigh:

Reply 769

-Tigs-

Original post by Byrks

Bad thing is, even if that's the case, I feel sort of bad, inadequate, wrong, or something, even though I rationally know it's a perfectly valid choice. Or at least I feel like I'm being judged that way and feel bad (even though I know it would be a wrong judgment). :s-smilie:

Ah well. It's just a couple of weeks. I'll just have to put up with it now. :sigh:

I completely understand that feeling. It's horrible, cause you're in your room all alone (at least in my case) while your flatmates go out and have fun.. I tried going to a freshers party yesterday, and it just sucked. I hated every second, which I pretty much knew I would, but I'm glad I tried it at least. But now I kind of feel like I have to justify myself to my flatmates, and I know a couple of the girls I went out with will definitely be judging me. The problem is that there genuinely aren't many student events (especially in the evenings) that don't involve alcohol in some way) - at least where I am. This whole thing is making my anxiety so much worse, I just can't wait for my course to start now.

Reply 770

Byrks

Original post by -Tigs-

Yeah, I know! I went last year to one (restarting from first year now), and I had a horrible time as well. I definitely wouldn't want to be at tonight's party right now, I'm sure of it. But even so... It sucks. Feeling like you have to justify yourself really sucks as well. Seriously, the rigidity of 'the fresher experience', despite announcing itself as an open, fun, great time, really ruins it. Why can't someone saying 'no thanks, going out partying isn't my thing' be an acceptable thing to do?

For now, though, I'm the same as you, feeling anxious and waiting for my course to start. I'm not a native English speaker, but my English is still good and I usually speak well, but lately due to my anxiety I've been stumbling over my words often, which makes me feel more anxious in turn haha. :sigh:

Have you checked with your Student Union? Some societies sometimes organise a few... Maybe some at your uni will.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 771

-Tigs-

Original post by Byrks

Have you checked with your Student Union? Some societies sometimes organise a few... Maybe some at your uni will.

Sometimes it feels like this taboo thing, like if you don't drink and party you're some kind of outcast who just doesn't know how to have fun. That might just be my perception, but people definitely look at you differently. Seriously, university advertises itself as this great place where everyone can just be themselves... But apparently only if 'being yourself' involves getting drunk, and suffocating slowly in a room full of other drunk people with music so loud that you can't actually tell what song is playing! Sorry, bit of a rant there!
I guess I might be judging the whole thing a bit too quickly, as I'm a first year so haven't actually gotten to the proper university stuff yet! (And I'm stuttering all over the place now too, so I wouldn't worry!)
I haven't checked with them, but that's a good idea! I'll do that - thanks :smile:

I know there's some societies around, and the freshers fair is yet to come, so at least there's that!
Whereabouts are you at uni?

Reply 772

textbookloser

completely agree with you guys, I'm a non-drinker at bristol uni (starting in a week) and I hope I find people who like doing things other than getting drunk and partying, like cultural activities, going for coffee and anything fun which doesn't require drinking. Really quite afraid of being the outcast when I go and having to justify my decision.

Reply 773

BlindingLight

Original post by -Tigs-

I know there's some societies around, and the freshers fair is yet to come, so at least there's that!
Whereabouts are you at uni?

Spot on.

Reply 774

Byrks

Original post by -Tigs-

I know there's some societies around, and the freshers fair is yet to come, so at least there's that!
Whereabouts are you at uni?

You're spot on with the social side of university. Most (although there are definitely a few exceptions) encourage you to 'be yourself' and then force you to be a partygoer. It's like forcing you to 'enjoy'. The academic side of uni and the societies side is different, though, so you'll find some refuge there. :smile:

I'm looking forward to the societies events and the fair as well. You know, to actually have a social life in a way I like and not feel 'inadequate' or 'excluded' for doing what you supposedly should do, 'being yourself'.

I'm in London, how about you?

Reply 775

KiranH

Original post by j0sephine

I'm at Bristol too! :smile:

I'm in Nelson House and I'm doing English.

Awesome.

Original post by WhamBamJam.

Oh cool - sounds sensible! Would you rather be in halls or don't really care? I've already had my own place in Bristol for (nearly) 3 years.. so been through the can't look after yourself stage.. eating pizza and fish finger sandwiches.. not cleaning for 3 weeks at a time.. now I'm all house proud and cook properly all the time so wouldn't fit in to a student house now haha. Plus I like my own space so accommodation would be a step backwards for me now.

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I'm not really bothered to be honest. There are some downsides such as isolating me from some people so it might be harder to make friends, but there are plenty of upsides too - such as having a double bed, a decent sized room, more control over decorations/furniture, and peace & quiet whilst trying to revise or do work. And, oh yeah, my sister has some really cute cats that stay there. :tongue:

Original post by Rosepaws

Hello