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Mental Health Support Society Mk X
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Original post by SciFiRory
im really not that great 
I just try to be nice to people and look after the people I care about is all 
I just try to be nice to people and look after the people I care about is all Hey, if I say you're great, then you're great, you silly billy!
Original post by rmhumphries
9 hours after I first started trying, I finally have all of Wolf's mice out of their cage so I can clean it. I am so not cut out for this!
Haha bonding with the meeces are you?
shell appreciate it even more due to the effort Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Sabertooth
Last night was really bad. My wife and I had a 2 hour argument about the government. Now she's threatening to get them to take me to hospital. She doesn't realize that's exactly what they want, what could be better than locking me up and giving me all kinds of mind-altering drugs, I'd be right under their thumb with no escape. There's no way in hell I'm letting that happen, last time it was so bad. I have a psychiatrist appointment on friday to decide my fate and my wife is coming with me so I can't lie about everything, I don't know what to do, I want to run away and hide.
Feeling so stupidly **** 
ill ill ill 
Posted from TSR Mobile
ill ill ill Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by PonchoKid
Haha bonding with the meeces are you? shell appreciate it even more due to the effort
Posted from TSR Mobile
shell appreciate it even more due to the effort Posted from TSR Mobile
Hmm, I think they are just getting more and more scared of me
I didn't want to remove all their nesting / safe place - hence why it took so long, I had to entice them into a knitted tube or eggbox with treats and then transfer them. Didn't help that I was shaking from being scared of dropping them and they run away.Done the easy bit of cleaning the cage, need to let it dry, and then do the second easy bit of putting bedding and stuff before I have to try and get them back into the cage. At least this time there are in a much smaller cage so *should* be easier to catch, and they *shouldn't* want to have a nap for a few hours like earlier!
Don't know what to do. Hating myself a lot at the moment. I'm doing stuff I don't even want to do anymore to try and cope and my feelings about it are all over the place. Everyone thinks I'm doing OK but I don't know how to keep doing this. Everything just feels so horrible. Don't know what to do.
Original post by rmhumphries
Hmm, I think they are just getting more and more scared of me I didn't want to remove all their nesting / safe place - hence why it took so long, I had to entice them into a knitted tube or eggbox with treats and then transfer them. Didn't help that I was shaking from being scared of dropping them and they run away.
Done the easy bit of cleaning the cage, need to let it dry, and then do the second easy bit of putting bedding and stuff before I have to try and get them back into the cage. At least this time there are in a much smaller cage so *should* be easier to catch, and they *shouldn't* want to have a nap for a few hours like earlier!
I didn't want to remove all their nesting / safe place - hence why it took so long, I had to entice them into a knitted tube or eggbox with treats and then transfer them. Didn't help that I was shaking from being scared of dropping them and they run away.Done the easy bit of cleaning the cage, need to let it dry, and then do the second easy bit of putting bedding and stuff before I have to try and get them back into the cage. At least this time there are in a much smaller cage so *should* be easier to catch, and they *shouldn't* want to have a nap for a few hours like earlier!
You feed them therefore they wont be scared of you
Wolfie will be proud because your looking after her babies and doing so well!
I couldnt even go near them let along pick them up and stuff! So you should be proud!
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd
Huge hugs 
Thanks.
Hope you feel better before your birthday.Original post by los lobos marinos
Be strong man. You know, deep down, that telling the truth is the only forward....
I'm not so sure it is. Last night my wife kept shouting that all she needs to do is tell the psychiatrist what I told her and that's it I'll be in a hospital and that terrifies me. What you said before was right on the money, I just want to be left alone, live happily with my wife and get on with my life making the best of things and telling the truth isn't going to lead to a situation where that's possible.
Need to get out of the mindset and place i am in at the moment or i'm gonna get seriously behind but there's just 0 in life i care about right now.
Original post by PonchoKid
You feed them therefore they wont be scared of you
Wolfie will be proud because your looking after her babies and doing so well!
I couldnt even go near them let along pick them up and stuff! So you should be proud!
Posted from TSR Mobile
Wolfie will be proud because your looking after her babies and doing so well!
I couldnt even go near them let along pick them up and stuff! So you should be proud!
Posted from TSR Mobile
Thanks
*****
My CMHT referral form asks do I have a disability? Do you think they mean other than mental health problems?
Original post by rmhumphries
My CMHT referral form asks do I have a disability? Do you think they mean other than mental health problems?
I'd think so.
Well done with the mice btw, I'm sure superwolf will really appreciate it.
Today was mixed . Once again I woke up too late to be able to have breakfast before going to lecture . Then when I did go in I sat next to the people I knew but there were others there that were incredibly distracting, plus it was right at the back and I couldn't get a word of what the lecturer was mumbling . Then for the tutorial I decided that I'm going to do the mature thing and sit at the front away from all these people and I got some work done . Then after that several of us went to the bar and one of the girls was clearly drinking too much and she did something stupid and got kicked out (getting on top of the pool table 
). She keeps smiling at me and was flirting with me earlier 
. Then I had to go with a girl who lives on my floor to the bank because she needed to sort something out, and that went good. And then in the evening I went back home for the night which is where I am right now.
. Once again I woke up too late to be able to have breakfast before going to lecture . Then when I did go in I sat next to the people I knew but there were others there that were incredibly distracting, plus it was right at the back and I couldn't get a word of what the lecturer was mumbling . Then for the tutorial I decided that I'm going to do the mature thing and sit at the front away from all these people and I got some work done . Then after that several of us went to the bar and one of the girls was clearly drinking too much and she did something stupid and got kicked out (getting on top of the pool table ). She keeps smiling at me and was flirting with me earlier . Then I had to go with a girl who lives on my floor to the bank because she needed to sort something out, and that went good. And then in the evening I went back home for the night which is where I am right now.Original post by asdfgah
Don't know what to do. Hating myself a lot at the moment. I'm doing stuff I don't even want to do anymore to try and cope and my feelings about it are all over the place. Everyone thinks I'm doing OK but I don't know how to keep doing this. Everything just feels so horrible. Don't know what to do.
You have us, to tell! Original post by Sabertooth
... telling the truth isn't going to lead to a situation where that's possible.
... telling the truth isn't going to lead to a situation where that's possible.
I don't think so. Telling the truth will show your wife you understand her worries and want to get better. Going to hospital won't be the end, but a new beginning. The thing is, you only get away forever (that is what you fear, or? ), if you trust the voices, if you don't trust them, you won't and will live with your life. You know that this is the logic, not by not telling the truth avoiding treatment (which will get you in a better state, as you know). Anyway, you will battle and win!!!
Original post by octoberbaby
Need to get out of the mindset and place i am in at the moment or i'm gonna get seriously behind but there's just 0 in life i care about right now.
What would you like to care about? (Can be a point to start and if it is just eating a cake...)
Original post by Sabertooth
I'd think so.
Well done with the mice btw, I'm sure superwolf will really appreciate it.
Well done with the mice btw, I'm sure superwolf will really appreciate it.
Original post by PonchoKid
You feed them therefore they wont be scared of you
Wolfie will be proud because your looking after her babies and doing so well!
I couldnt even go near them let along pick them up and stuff! So you should be proud!
Posted from TSR Mobile
Wolfie will be proud because your looking after her babies and doing so well!
I couldnt even go near them let along pick them up and stuff! So you should be proud!
Posted from TSR Mobile
Mousies in their proper cage, and looking fairly happy now
Elliott persisted in being trouble to get back (he was the cause of the 9 hour transfer), I think the problem is he is the smartest, so he isn't as easily tricked by 'treat-in-a-box'. Thanks for your support Original post by Sabertooth
Is there anything you can do that you really enjoy which is also productive? Maybe once you start something enjoyable but productive it might be easier to get yourself to do less enjoyable productive things? I know how tough it is when you've got no motivation though. Even just playing a computer game might count perhaps, enjoyable and distracts you.
Even just playing a computer game might count perhaps, enjoyable and distracts you.Original post by Sabertooth
Is there anything you can do that you really enjoy which is also productive? Maybe once you start something enjoyable but productive it might be easier to get yourself to do less enjoyable productive things? I know how tough it is when you've got no motivation though. Even just playing a computer game might count perhaps, enjoyable and distracts you.
Even just playing a computer game might count perhaps, enjoyable and distracts you.Sorry for late reply - even things like replying to posts about me I put off ><
I am able to do things unproductive such as watch TV / play games (usually) without issue, although if playing a game and it goes badly, makes me feel worse. Unfortunately, that is all I can do. An example of just how useless I am - I have been meaning to post some presents to my sister for her and her family for about 2/3 months now, I can't even get myself to wrap presents ><
Original post by rmhumphries
Sorry for late reply - even things like replying to posts about me I put off ><
I am able to do things unproductive such as watch TV / play games (usually) without issue, although if playing a game and it goes badly, makes me feel worse. Unfortunately, that is all I can do. An example of just how useless I am - I have been meaning to post some presents to my sister for her and her family for about 2/3 months now, I can't even get myself to wrap presents ><
I am able to do things unproductive such as watch TV / play games (usually) without issue, although if playing a game and it goes badly, makes me feel worse. Unfortunately, that is all I can do. An example of just how useless I am - I have been meaning to post some presents to my sister for her and her family for about 2/3 months now, I can't even get myself to wrap presents ><
You just managed Operation Mice Clean Out successfully, not that useless.
Original post by avhhs
Today was mixed . Once again I woke up too late to be able to have breakfast before going to lecture . Then when I did go in I sat next to the people I knew but there were others there that were incredibly distracting, plus it was right at the back and I couldn't get a word of what the lecturer was mumbling . Then for the tutorial I decided that I'm going to do the mature thing and sit at the front away from all these people and I got some work done . Then after that several of us went to the bar and one of the girls was clearly drinking too much and she did something stupid and got kicked out (getting on top of the pool table ). She keeps smiling at me and was flirting with me earlier . Then I had to go with a girl who lives on my floor to the bank because she needed to sort something out, and that went good. And then in the evening I went back home for the night which is where I am right now.
. Once again I woke up too late to be able to have breakfast before going to lecture . Then when I did go in I sat next to the people I knew but there were others there that were incredibly distracting, plus it was right at the back and I couldn't get a word of what the lecturer was mumbling . Then for the tutorial I decided that I'm going to do the mature thing and sit at the front away from all these people and I got some work done . Then after that several of us went to the bar and one of the girls was clearly drinking too much and she did something stupid and got kicked out (getting on top of the pool table ). She keeps smiling at me and was flirting with me earlier . Then I had to go with a girl who lives on my floor to the bank because she needed to sort something out, and that went good. And then in the evening I went back home for the night which is where I am right now.Having some cereal bars/packets of dried fruit/bananas on hand might be an idea for when you're too busy for breakfast. Glad you had a pretty good day
Original post by Sabertooth
Last night my wife kept shouting that all she needs to do is tell the psychiatrist what I told her and that's it I'll be in a hospital and that terrifies me. What you said before was right on the money, I just want to be left alone, live happily with my wife and get on with my life making the best of things and telling the truth isn't going to lead to a situation where that's possible.
Is it not possible that your wife, as part of that wonderful shared and trusting relationship, is trying to act as some kind of informal navigator for you during periods of ill-health? Might it be that her intervention, as an informal and trusted navigator, is an attempt to map out a route so you can both live happily, get on with your lives together and make the very best of all that you share? She may feel that the truth is the shortest and safest way back home...
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by asdfgah
Don't know what to do. Hating myself a lot at the moment. I'm doing stuff I don't even want to do anymore to try and cope and my feelings about it are all over the place. Everyone thinks I'm doing OK but I don't know how to keep doing this. Everything just feels so horrible. Don't know what to do.
What's happening that's causing you to feel so bad?
What happened to the old Depression Society on TSR? I used to post there sometimes a couple of years ago.
And why the hell can I not sleep. I am about as stable and 'normal' as I could ever hope to be. But I can't sleep or do my bloody work/study 'cos I know it's all going to go pear-shaped sometime soon and it all seems...well..what's the point...I've already managed to start an argument with my tutor during group tutorial...I thought he was inferring things about me with his looks and gestures and had to walk out so I could swear and shout in the main corridor...how the hell am I going to get a degree when this is as well as I can ever get?
And why the hell can I not sleep. I am about as stable and 'normal' as I could ever hope to be. But I can't sleep or do my bloody work/study 'cos I know it's all going to go pear-shaped sometime soon and it all seems...well..what's the point...I've already managed to start an argument with my tutor during group tutorial...I thought he was inferring things about me with his looks and gestures and had to walk out so I could swear and shout in the main corridor...how the hell am I going to get a degree when this is as well as I can ever get?
Original post by Nathanielle
I don't think so. Telling the truth will show your wife you understand her worries and want to get better. Going to hospital won't be the end, but a new beginning. The thing is, you only get away forever (that is what you fear, or? ), if you trust the voices, if you don't trust them, you won't and will live with your life. You know that this is the logic, not by not telling the truth avoiding treatment (which will get you in a better state, as you know). Anyway, you will battle and win!!!
I'm worried about the government having me under their thumb and able to do whatever they please to me. Right now I'm in danger but I still have choices, I don't want those choices to be taken away.
As for the truth, well, I haven't really got much say in it unless I can somehow convince my wife not to come with me.
Original post by rmhumphries
Sorry for late reply - even things like replying to posts about me I put off ><
I am able to do things unproductive such as watch TV / play games (usually) without issue, although if playing a game and it goes badly, makes me feel worse. Unfortunately, that is all I can do. An example of just how useless I am - I have been meaning to post some presents to my sister for her and her family for about 2/3 months now, I can't even get myself to wrap presents ><
I am able to do things unproductive such as watch TV / play games (usually) without issue, although if playing a game and it goes badly, makes me feel worse. Unfortunately, that is all I can do. An example of just how useless I am - I have been meaning to post some presents to my sister for her and her family for about 2/3 months now, I can't even get myself to wrap presents ><
No worries about the late reply I can appreciate it's difficult when you're having such motivation problems.
You cleaned out the mice that's a pretty big thing. Maybe you could try writing a list of things that need doing? Once it's down on paper you might have a better idea about everything and you can start with the smaller tasks and work up. Even something like opening the mail counts as doing something, then try rewarding yourself once you've crossed it off the list?
(and yeah, i've been meaning to send a parcel to someone for the past 2 months and it's still not even wrapped so I know what you mean.
)Original post by los lobos marinos
I cannot imagine what it is like to have that sort of relationship with someone. To have that level of trust, where everything can be shared, even the most dark and private thoughts, emotions and fears. Which brings me to a couple of questions (hope I'm not being too heavy. Let me know if I am)
Is it not possible that your wife, as part of that wonderful shared and trusting relationship, is trying to act as some kind of informal navigator for you during periods of ill-health? Might it be that her intervention, as an informal and trusted navigator, is an attempt to map out a route so you can both live happily, get on with your lives together and make the very best of all that you share? She may feel that the truth is the shortest and safest way back home...
Is it not possible that your wife, as part of that wonderful shared and trusting relationship, is trying to act as some kind of informal navigator for you during periods of ill-health? Might it be that her intervention, as an informal and trusted navigator, is an attempt to map out a route so you can both live happily, get on with your lives together and make the very best of all that you share? She may feel that the truth is the shortest and safest way back home...
Tbh man, I never thought I'd have such a relationship, it still amazes me that everything turned out how it did.
As for your second paragraph, well, that's the idea. She made me promise to trust her and her opinion on the voices and other stuff, but I'm a crappy guy I broke my promise because I don't believe her. I want to trust her but there are too many things that make way more sense with my interpretation. That's why she's so angry, I broke my promise.
Original post by los lobos marinos
What happened to the old Depression Society on TSR? I used to post there sometimes a couple of years ago.
And why the hell can I not sleep. I am about as stable and 'normal' as I could ever hope to be. But I can't sleep or do my bloody work/study 'cos I know it's all going to go pear-shaped sometime soon and it all seems...well..what's the point...I've already managed to start an argument with my tutor during group tutorial...I thought he was inferring things about me with his looks and gestures and had to walk out so I could swear and shout in the main corridor...how the hell am I going to get a degree when this is as well as I can ever get?
And why the hell can I not sleep. I am about as stable and 'normal' as I could ever hope to be. But I can't sleep or do my bloody work/study 'cos I know it's all going to go pear-shaped sometime soon and it all seems...well..what's the point...I've already managed to start an argument with my tutor during group tutorial...I thought he was inferring things about me with his looks and gestures and had to walk out so I could swear and shout in the main corridor...how the hell am I going to get a degree when this is as well as I can ever get?
The depression society was renamed this to try and better include those with mental health conditions other than depression.
It might be that you've got a lot on your mind, walking out the tutorial is probably running over in your mind a million times and you've mentioned worries about getting your degree so that's another thing. I might be completely wrong there though, I dunno. Have you applied for DSA? That might be worth doing, I know some people on here found the stuff it paid for invaluable - for instance someone to talk to about work/mental health.
Don't beat yourself up about the argument, it's not going to stop you getting a degree if that's what you really want. Maybe apologize though if it'll make you feel better?
