Online dating

I am chatting to a guy that has got in contact through a dating site and has asked me to go and visit him but the thing is that we have been chatting for only 2 days and I'm abit concerned that it make be too good to be true. I have mentioned that I'm not ready for that sort of trip especially as he lives in Leicester and I live near Leeds. Have I done right by saying I'm not going or have i made a fool of myself?

Reply 1

kiara139

Original post by ClairSweeting

In my opinion, you did it right by denying.

Reply 2

jimmyclyro

Yeah, I'd say give it a bit more time than that before you meet up, especially with that distance. You definitely haven't made a fool of yourself, it's normal to have reservations about things such as online dating, so just take your time and only meet up with someone when you are ready.

Reply 3

Aniaa

I met my boyfriend online. We exchanged like literally 5 texts when he came to see me. And we are couple since 7 months now :smile:

Reply 4

lizlaz350

You've not made yourself look stupid, you should only meet up with someone once you feel comfortable about it and 2 days isn't very long at all.

Reply 5

Musie Suzie

You were very sensible, OP. Keep chatting, see each other over a video call (make sure he's not a catfish) and when you do meet, try and find a halfway point so that you're in neutral territory, as it were. And somewhere public in the daytime, of course! Gotta look after yourself :smile:

Reply 6

Zarek

Original post by ClairSweeting

Done right. You know it makes sense.

Reply 7

ForgetMe

Original post by Aniaa

I met my boyfriend online. We exchanged like literally 5 texts when he came to see me. And we are couple since 7 months now :smile:

Not always things turn like for you did :smile:

Back in my country, 14 years old girl went to meet up with 16 years old guy whom she met on Facebook and knew only for few days. She was found raped and dead.

Lucky you, but it's a risk to meet someone you only knew for few days.

Reply 8

Aniaa

Original post by ForgetMe

Not always things turn like for you did :smile:

yes I know but I actually had few dates with guys whom I met on internet. Beside fact they all wanted me just for sex (so our 'realationships' didn't last long) they weren't dangerous.
And my boyfriend...well, he also at first took me for a slut but fell in love quickly and so we lasted together.
Also my friend met her boyfriend online (at the same website actually) and they make a perfect couple !

Reply 9

Voyager_2002

Original post by Aniaa

Which website?

Reply 10

gemmanewman

2 days isn't very long at all, no matter if you guys spoke for 24 hours a day or 2 hours a day, doesn't make a difference.
You made the correct choice by saying no :smile:

Reply 11

Aniaa

Original post by Voyager_2002

Which website?

www.twoo.com

Reply 12

lizlaz350

Original post by Aniaa

I'm a big advocate for internet dating, I met my boyfriend on twitter and I know lots of people who met partners online. I've also made friends online and met up with them.

However, you still need to be safe and can't assume that everyone you talk to online will be okay. If you've only spoken to someone for 2 days, it's perfectly reasonable and actually incredibly sensible to not want to meet up with them especially if they want you to stay round their house. Every time I've met someone, I've taken precautions to make sure I'd be safe if they turned out to not be who they said they were.

Stick to meeting in public places and don't agree to go round their house until you've met them a few times and know them better!

Reply 13

ClairSweeting

Thanks guys for the advice. I feel much better and happy in knowing that I'm doing the right thing by not going

Reply 14

Voyager_2002

Original post by ClairSweeting

Thanks guys for the advice. I feel much better and happy in knowing that I'm doing the right thing by not going

Good. Of course you can continue to chat, and arrange a meeting once you feel ready. Going to visit him on his territory is never likely to be a good idea for a first real-life meeting.

Reply 15

ForgetMe

Original post by Aniaa

As I've said before, sometimes it turns out fine but sometimes it's a huge risk :smile:

My sister met with a guy online and after few months he invited her to come to his country. She was too scared and didn't come, so later he started to insult her and threaten.

There are good stories but how are you going to ensure that the person hasn't got any bad intentions?

If she wants to go, it's safer if he comes to visit her and she's accompanied by few friends.

Personally, I've met with few people that I have met online. Some turned out to be good, some not. I did take risk to go to visit a guy in another town alone but if I would need to go now, I would think carefully before going.

I definitely support meeting in public places!

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 16

Aniaa