This discussion is now closed.

Check out other Related discussions

Why is it viewed as weird if a guy has a sex toy, but normal if a girl has one?

I don't understand this. It's commonly known that most girls have some form of sex toy (such as a dildo or vibrator) that they use to pleasure themselves. Many girls may discuss sex toys privately among their girl friends but it probably isn't something they would openly discuss in front of guys. If you find out a girl has a sex toy, it is a little embarrassing for both parties but after a short while, you shrug it off as normal and carry on living your life. Overall it is seen as perfectly normal for a girl to possess as sex toy.

The opposite couldn't be more true for guys. If someone found out a guy owned a sex toy (such as a fleshlight or pocket pussy) that he used to pleasure himself, he would immediately be viewed as a creepy loser. He can't talk about it among his guy friends because they would take the piss and ridicule him for the rest of his life.

I don't get this difference. Somehow it's perfectly okay for a girl to own a sex toy and pleasure herself with a bit of plastic but once a guy has a sex toy, it's seen as creepy and sad and if any girl found out, she would probably never want to be your girlfriend.

Reply 1

pane123

16

Because guys don't need their hands to vibrate.

Reply 2

alexmagpie

15

A lot of women can't, or find it very difficult to orgasm without stimulation from a vibrator

Reply 3

Le Nombre

16

Original post by pane123

Because guys don't need their hands to vibrate.

I don't know about you but my cock does not vibrate and nature has deemed that worthy of doing the job.

Reply 4

christopher23

15

Society man, its fked up like that.

I dont own a sex toy, besides the only one i can think of is a pocket pussy...

Also guys arent as open about these sort of things like women are.

Reply 5

Katie_p

15

Girls need a dildo to simulate penetrative sex, whilst guys can use their hands. I know it's not that similar a sensation, but it's far closer than a girl can get with her hands unless she's incredibly flexible!
Personally I find it weird because I'm really not keen on penises, so anything designed to stimulate that is a bit "ewwww" in my mind. Otherwise I really wouldn't have much issue with it.

Just an afterthought, having discussed with female friends, I know there is a lot of desire to have the "best" orgasm, and a lot of girls think this is only achievable with a toy. I don't discuss it as much with guys, but my perception is they;re more concerned with either quantity, or existence at all, than with quality, hence the hand is good enough to do the job and toys aren't needed.

Reply 6

Bassetts

OP

17

Original post by alexmagpie

A lot of women can't, or find it very difficult to orgasm without stimulation from a vibrator

Original post by Katie_p

Girls need a dildo to simulate penetrative sex, whilst guys can use their hands. I know it's not that similar a sensation, but it's far closer than a girl can get with her hands unless she's incredibly flexible!
Personally I find it weird because I'm really not keen on penises, so anything designed to stimulate that is a bit "ewwww" in my mind. Otherwise I really wouldn't have much issue with it.

Just an afterthought, having discussed with female friends, I know there is a lot of desire to have the "best" orgasm, and a lot of girls think this is only achievable with a toy. I don't discuss it as much with guys, but my perception is they;re more concerned with either quantity, or existence at all, than with quality, hence the hand is good enough to do the job and toys aren't needed.

That still doesn't explain why it is viewed as weird for a guy. Toys are better for guys than their hand is.

Reply 7

Michaelj

10

I for one can get more pleasure with my hands than I could with a crappy sex toy that would get ruined after one go.

Reply 8

Katie_p

15

Original post by Bassetts

That still doesn't explain why it is viewed as weird for a guy. Toys are better for guys than their hand is.

Righhht, so I explained why I personally find it a bit weird, and gave a potential explanation for why girls are more likely to "need" or at least want a toy.
Not saying I'm right, because it's just anecdotal or opinion, but I've at leasted attempted to explain it.

Reply 9

alexmagpie

15

Original post by Bassetts

That still doesn't explain why it is viewed as weird for a guy. Toys are better for guys than their hand is.

I imagine that it's probably something to do with the fact that men are expected to get laid more - masturbation has been accepted amongst males for necessity, but needing to go and buy a fake vagina perhaps makes you seem a bit desperate.

It's not the same for women buying fake penises because nobody really cares if women aren't getting lots of real sex - in fact it's probably preferred if they aren't.

Reply 10

canadamoose

5

I far prefer the real thing or my hand to any kind of vibrator or dildo, but that's just my opinion. I wouldn't judge a guy for having a toy, but I don't really see the need, and from what I've seen of toys for guys, they get kind of gross and take a fair bit of effort to clean properly. My biggest concern would be cleanliness. I don't think it's weird for guys or girls.

Reply 11

Kgooding

2

I think people view it as peculiar because it's not openly discussed by men. Women who have they tend to gossip about it with people whereas the guys I know will only talk about the latest girl they've had rather than the last time they used a flesh light or got themselves off

Reply 12

ChocoCoatedLemons

17

Hmm. Sex toys for girls are quite easy to clean, fleshlights really aren't.

And Hell, I don't know. I personally wouldn't care if a guy owned a toy, the more the merrier I say. :colone:

Reply 13

Bassetts

OP

17

Original post by alexmagpie

I imagine that it's probably something to do with the fact that men are expected to get laid more - masturbation has been accepted amongst males for necessity, but needing to go and buy a fake vagina perhaps makes you seem a bit desperate.

It's not the same for women buying fake penises because nobody really cares if women aren't getting lots of real sex - in fact it's probably preferred if they aren't.

But there are a huge number of guys who don't get laid at all. They are expected to but they don't or can't. If it's preferred for women not to get a lot of real sex, what are these guys supposed to do?

Reply 14

Katie_p

15

Original post by ChocoCoatedLemons

Hmm. Sex toys for girls are quite easy to clean, fleshlights really aren't.

And Hell, I don't know. I personally wouldn't care if a guy owned a toy, the more the merrier I say. :colone:

I would have thought it was the same level of effort to clean them? Sure, guys probably make more mess, but you can't just wipe a dildo with a tissue and put it back in your drawer?

Reply 15

455409

17

It's considered weird because it is, in my opinion. Sorry. I don't even really know why you'd need one as a guy.

Reply 16

alexmagpie

15

Original post by Bassetts

But there are a huge number of guys who don't get laid at all. They are expected to but they don't or can't. If it's preferred for women not to get a lot of real sex, what are these guys supposed to do?

I didn't say it was logical, I said it might be an explanation. Women aren't going to ridicule each other for not having sex - men frequently do.

Feel free to get a sex toy, but I don't know why you'd even feel the need to discuss it.

Reply 17

ChocoCoatedLemons

17

Original post by Katie_p

I would have thought it was the same level of effort to clean them? Sure, guys probably make more mess, but you can't just wipe a dildo with a tissue and put it back in your drawer?

You can wipe them with the cleaning wipes they sell in Ann Summers :colonhash:

THEN put it back in your drawer. Or in the box, wherever.

Whereas a guy is gonna have to rinse out a fleshlight, surely.

Reply 18

StretfordEnd

15

I genuinely thought it was pretty common knowledge that there is a vast, vast difference between a clitoral orgasm and a vaginal orgasm. Unless a girl is either insanely double jointed or has freakishly long fingers then it's rather difficult to give herself a vaginal orgasm.

Whereas for guys, an orgasm is an orgasm. You don't really need a toy to do anything you can't do with your hands.