Relationships & Me

I had difficulty posting this because I feel like I already know what the answer is. However, I want to hear what people think.

Well I'll start this talk with a relationships. I'm a guy and I have pretty normal life at university - got friends, go out occasionally, not part of too many societies. I've hooked up with people in the early weeks of university, but after that it just didn't feel right so I decided on stopping with that. I think the reason for it is because I wanted more then that. Now, I pretty much just feel like getting everything done and diving straight into the world of work. This is what bothers me about the relationship thing though, I seriously can't be asked to do any one night stands or just hook up with random people. I want to find someone who is an equal, understands me and we just generally get along. Does this seem unreasonable?

The main reason I mention he above is I've met someone I like and I'm pretty sure she likes me to. I want to, but I don't want to. It's like I feel like if she isn't the one I would just be wasting my time, but at the same time I realize if I approach things like this I'll never find the one. Even then, if I was to give it a go I'm worried that I may run out of things to talk about and then in turn lose this person who was the potential 'one'. Does that make sense? I've realized that I can make conversation with people for a while, but there reaches a point where I get bored or there isn't much to talk about and I end up asking questions about what the other person is talking about - which I assume is boring conversation for them. I hate reaching that dry spot, because it just indicates that clearly we aren't compatible. When I speak to her we haven't gotten to this point yet, but there is the potential for it right?

This opens up yet another concern. I act slightly different when I'm out. Not like a completely different person, but just more extrovert - if that's the right term. When I am out with mates, I am funnier and talkative. However, I always tend to be like that when I haven't seen people for a while because I have stuff to talk about. But, after a while of his I just don't see the point to conversations sometimes. I can never have a serious conversation without throwing a joke or saying something witty because I just find it far too boring and serious. Even then, I still find most conversation to be really boring. Like I'm a bit nerdy in the sense, that I enjoy talk about trying to find the answer to something. Like philosophical question, talks on medicine or the sciences. I enjoy a good debate with people, but some interpret it as arguments.

Most of the time, I find conversation pointless. It's just something I engage in because it's just the convention isn't it. I don't know how I would tell someone this though, it's seen as weird. I personally don't mind, but I always think about the person I would settle down with and I don't think they would be able to tolerate such a feature. I thought about just keeping up an act, but I wouldn't want to do that around some I believe is the one. I would much rather prefer a honest relationship.

I believe the only things I really care about has always been myself, my friends, my goals in life. But I wouldn't mind having a partner who is an equal. At the same time, something which I find really strange is, I want kids when I older. I am quite mature but act immature because it's so more funnier, I reckon that would be a great trait with a father haha. I don't want kids straight away, but I don't want to be one of those people who get together and don't have kids or just be the person all alone.

Reply 1

Lotus_Eater

Forgive me if this sounds sarcastic but if you had to condense the above into a single question or point, what would it be?

Reply 2

Chwirkytheappleboy

Original post by Anonymous

I've realized that I can make conversation with people for a while, but there reaches a point where I get bored or there isn't much to talk about and I end up asking questions about what the other person is talking about - which I assume is boring conversation for them

Wait, you think people don't like talking about themselves and the things that they're interested in? Have you ever met... Uhm... Anyone?

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by Chwirkytheappleboy

Wait, you think people don't like talking about themselves and the things that they're interested in? Have you ever met... Uhm... Anyone?

I've just always assumed it must be boring just answering questions about things, because the other person doesn't understand.

Reply 4

AristoBrat!

How about stop thinking so much and go with the flow if you really like her?

Reply 5

Mickey the idiot

Original post by AristoBrat!

How about stop thinking so much and go with the flow if you really like her?

Hi, how are you today?

Reply 6

AristoBrat!

Original post by Mickey the idiot

Hi, how are you today?

Ermm hello, I'm fit as a fiddle, thank you. You good?

Reply 7

Mickey the idiot

Original post by AristoBrat!

Ermm hello, I'm fit as a fiddle, thank you. You good?

I'm fit as a fiddle too, I even have a six pack, alongside almighty abs.

and yes, I'm good, wuu2 today?

Reply 8

AristoBrat!

Original post by Mickey the idiot

I'm fit as a fiddle too, I even have a six pack, alongside almighty abs.

and yes, I'm good, wuu2 today?

I'm in a 'Derail the thread' mood, sure let's continue this convo.
Why are you an idiot?

Reply 9

Mickey the idiot

Original post by AristoBrat!

I'm in a 'Derail the thread' mood, sure let's continue this convo.
Why are you an idiot?

It's actually from doctor who, one of the characters got called 'mickey the idiot' hence the username. What's the deal with your username, are you itallian?

Reply 10

AristoBrat!

Original post by Mickey the idiot

It's actually from doctor who, one of the characters got called 'mickey the idiot' hence the username. What's the deal with your username, are you itallian?