BF said i could sleep around - how to make less tempting

im just horny in general. I would love it if my boyfriend could visit more. I only think about wanting to have sex with him. I've never fantasised about anyone else. But when I'm horny and it seems as if other guys are interested in me then it can become slightly tempting.

If you're tempted, and considering sleeping with someone else the relationship is over. Simple as that.

I'm currently in a long distance relationship, and of course I fancy a **** while she's gone, but not with anyone else, just her, hence why I'm trying to make it work despite the distance.

Which is why one of my theories i stated is that he is doing 'damage limitation'. He probably feels/fears you're going to cheat/sleep with someone else, and so in his mind, if he says its ok, it will either hut him less as he expected it (and controlled it - again in his mind), or that he is making it less attractive to you by giving his "permission".

Are you actually asking how to make it less tempting to sleep with someone else?

Do you actually realise what you are saying makes no concieveable sense? Why would someone with rock bottom confidence want their girlfriend to sleep with someone else? Hardly going to do them any favours is it?

But he had also said that he trusts me. Either make it less tempting or clearly friend zoning a guy (without it being awkward) so they won't flirt with me.

He said that if someone was flirting with him then it would also be tempting. But he never picks up on flirting anyway and even if he did, his confidence is so low that he wouldn't act on it. I trust him and he trusts me.

By the sounds of it he's submissive and lacks the confidence to believe that he is worthy of his girlfriend. He has therefore put her needs before his and disregarded any of his own feelings, or perversely he may get off on the fact that she is going to pleasured by a bigger, better man in his opinion.

The ultimate mix of weakness and sweetness. He essentially wishes to be a cuckold while his girl is taken by a "bull".

...

OP, has he elaborated on who he wants you to sleep with or was it vague?

So you'd both be tempted to cheat on one another? In my opinion that's pretty much cheating, or not far from it, This won't last long term. Finish it and **** random lads at uni as that seems to be what you want.

I hope you're right. He said he wouldn't mind if it was nice guy who respects me.

he hasn't had anyone flirt with him so it doesn't apply to him. Neither of us consider that cheating, especially if we are in an open relationship. And that's not even what's being discussed, it's how to deal with my hormones which isn't being helped by the medication I'm on. It's being in an honest relationship with each other. I don't want to sleep with other people and even if I was single, I have no desire to be a slut, it's not the kind of person I am.

He said that if someone was flirting with him then it would also be tempting. But he never picks up on flirting anyway and even if he did, his confidence is so low that he wouldn't act on it. I trust him and he trusts me.

****ing hell maybe he's so insecure because you keep saying he's socially retarded

you better check yourself before you shrek yourself

As weird as it sounds you should find out whether he gets a thrill from this or whether he's just solely putting your needs before his.

Try find out whether he wants you to be ****ed by a big, strong, dominant man or whether somebody like him.

If it's the former he might be getting off from it in his mind (probably won't admit it).

Stay away from said guy.
Do not flirt with said guy.
Make it obvious to said guy you won't be sleeping with him.
Talk about your bf to said guy plenty of times.

Any or a combination of these might help.

I'd be more concerned why as soon as a guy shows you interest, you're tempted. Is your relationship with your bf strong?

Why is it tempting? Does he not satisfy you? Sounds like you're better off splitting up if you are tempted.

He's not socially retarded. He has plenty of friends, he's just got no confidence with girls.
I doubt it's that. Anyway those kinds of guys you mention are usually the douchey man-sluts that he said he wouldn't want me to sleep with.

My classes are sausage-fests though, I can't avoid guys, including the ones who have flirted with me. Everyone's now in their friendship groups and I've ended up with two guys plus a 3rd who neither of us three like, but he tries to hang around with us. But this 3rd guy does want to sleep with me, although I easily said no to him as he's weird, creepy and not very good looking, even if I was single I could probably say no to him. I'm not used to male attention, when I was at school it would be the guys who would bully me for being fat and ugly. So suddenly getting attention from guys + being rather horny, does make it somewhat tempting. But I would rather have my boyfriend though.

I find your post patronising and full of ignorance. Did you even read my opening post!?! I don't want to cheat on him. That's the point of this thread. I wanted advice on how to cope, not lectures calling me a slut, telling me to end it or masturbate. But I love him and trust him and want to be with him. That's the point of this thread. I'm after advice on how to feel less tempted. I don't want to sleep with other guys, but I can get rather horny.

"Too many guys like me and follow me around, some are weird and creepy and ugly"
You sound like a bitch.

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Agreed, to be honest. I can't imagine ever being tempted to sleep with anyone other than my partner, because I'm head over heels in love with him.